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AIBU?

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Original poster

To fancy the postman?

52 replies

SaturndayNight · 20/12/2017 10:22

I don't know if it's because he brings me presents - daily at the moment.

Or because he's seen me half-dressed (half-naked I like to think).

Or because he's out there doing the hard work so I don't have to.

Or just because he's so lovely and handsome....

But it's quite a frisson opening the door each morning I have to say. I wonder if he feels it too....dreamy.....

Disclaimer: I'm married with children and am not about to begin a torrid affair with the postman.

OP posts:
MrsMarigold · 20/12/2017 16:32

Wasn't there a Jilly Cooper story "Grab the postman and slim"?

Skinandbones · 20/12/2017 16:43

Think I've blown it with my postie, when I slipped and fell down the stairs, while rushing to get the door.
Bent my foot back and landed on all fours, crawled to the door and opened it on my hands and knees.
Funnily he hasn't knock at my door since, just shoves everything through the letter box.

Original poster
SaturndayNight · 20/12/2017 19:49

What does grab the postman and slim mean?? Although I like the sound of both...

OP posts:
TheBadgersMadeMeDoIt · 21/12/2017 00:13

I'm jealous. Our postman is a gormless, gangly kid who can barely string a sentence together. I once answered to door to find him standing there empty handed. I think what he meant to tell me was "There's a very large and heavy parcel for you on the van, so I thought I'd better ring the bell and make sure you were in before bringing it to the door."

What he actually said was "You've got a really big box."

I'd not long given birth to DD and it was so hard to not reply "Well, bigger than it used to be..."

NobodysChild · 21/12/2017 14:36

I want a sexy postman and not the dork I've currently got. A dirrrrty filthy coalman would be nice too. Oh, and a copper, mmmmm. I'm putting these on my Christmas list right now!

steff13 · 21/12/2017 14:41

We have a new mailman, and he's really attractive. Not super competent though. He keeps leaving us our neighbor's mail.

dubdurbs · 21/12/2017 14:45

I stumbled down the stairs this morning in my PJs, hair all over the place, and several pillow creases in my face, ready to snarl at my postman.

Instead of the sarcastic old grump who likes to tell me I'm lazy for not being up and dressed at cock crow, there was a gorgeous stubbly specimen smiling at me, parcel in hand. Mortified.

ididntmeanitlikethat · 21/12/2017 14:49

He could have just pushed it in without a word, but he obviously wanted to give it to me face to face

^ the opener to your erotic postie novel Grin

BulletFox · 21/12/2017 14:54

Saturn he obviously wanted to catch you unawares

Why have I never had a hot postie, I'll put a complaint to Royal Mail right this instance

Original poster
SaturndayNight · 21/12/2017 14:57

"You've got a really big box."
Grin

OP posts:
Original poster
SaturndayNight · 21/12/2017 14:58

He hasn't knocked today. I feel a bit lost. He did push a couple of cards through but that was it. I think he's playing hard to get.

OP posts:
VerticalBlinds · 21/12/2017 14:59

I used to sometimes shag a local chap when I was a young single person who is now our postman Smile

aintnothinbutagstring · 21/12/2017 15:35

I love our posties, they're both really enthusiast about their job, its quite refreshing.

SpongeBobJudgeyPants · 21/12/2017 18:54

Is it just me that remembers KreecherUnderTheStairs hot postman in Holland when reading this? Xmas Grin

blueskyinmarch · 21/12/2017 18:58

My postman looks like Luigi off Mario cart. No erotic fantasy for me. He is very nice though.

karategirl · 21/12/2017 21:14

I am very jealous of everyone's hottie posties. My two BILs are both postmen, and certainly not my type! And we never seem to have the same chap delivering to us.

Looking forward to the next instalment of laudanum's book Xmas Grin

Tiredtomybones · 21/12/2017 22:06

TheBadgers that is properly funny.

AntarticKittyClaws · 21/12/2017 22:15

Our local postman isn't that hot, but the local tractor contractor is gorgeous. There's something about him sat up high in the John Dere that makes me go weak at the knees. And don't get me started on harvesting. I had the Wurzels stuck in my head for days.🚜

HildaZelda · 21/12/2017 23:07

When I was 16/17 I was absolutely besotted with the local postman. He was about 40 at the time and I'd gone to school with his son!

I bumped into him last year in the supermarket. He's 60+ now, but still an attractive man.
My current postman is a camp as a row of pink tents, so definitely no attraction there.

Fitzsimmons · 21/12/2017 23:14

Mine is lovely. He flags me down in the village if he sees me in the car so he can give my parcels. He also leaves a smiley face on any "while you were out" cards. I like to think I'm the only one getting the smiley faces.

usernameinfinito · 22/12/2017 18:16

I've got post women not post men.

BobbinThreadbare123 · 22/12/2017 18:21

We seem to have two postmen. One of them is an older gentleman who dons shorts irrespective of the weather. The other one is as yet unseen but he concertinas every single bloody piece of mail, no matter how small or if it says do not bend. I don't like him. I like firemen.

longingforalife · 23/12/2017 00:06

The office/reception where I work accepts deliveries for the staff. Been very busy in the run up to Christmas. We don't mind as there's a couple of lovely drivers... one from Yodel! My colleague and I look at each other and say 'I would!' Wink but then the local vicar arrived on his motorbike in his leathers, and, yes, we would Blush Shock. The actual postman, not so much.

Ethylred · 23/12/2017 00:20

Your post would be interesting if you were about to shag embark on a torrid affair.
And then tell us about it.

SisterMortificado · 23/12/2017 14:34

Around here, posties ride small motorbikes.
All I know about my postie is that he is 750% phenomenally wizardy grey beard, 10% huge smile and sunglasses, and 10% bright red bike and 5% "Orright luv, avvagoowun!"

I'm very fond of him. He never bends anything and he seems to have a great time pootling away on his motorbike.