Why do some people feel the need to describe themselves as ‘middle class’?

[lottieandmia22]

I met a man who said

‘I am incredibly lucky. I’m a middle class, white, straight male which puts me at an advantage’

Frankly, this made my teeth itch. I thought ‘what a tosser’

Why do people feel the need to do this? I couldn’t care less which class I am.

I too would be interested in why you would say you aren't MN, OP even though you say both the fact you were privately educated and your hobbies and interests are ??

Obviously, you were the only one there OP, and generally I'd say that so much of what is said, isn't down to the words, but the tone of voice, body language, and facial expression, as well, of course as the context. As you have said you do miss social meanings however, then we are probably all guessing at what he meant . So, why not read back over the 250 odd posts and realise that there are lots of ways he could have said it, that actually make him socially aware, or 'emotionally intelligent' as someone else has said, and - if you like him otherwise - give him the benefit of the doubt. If it is still worrying you, then ask him. Tell him that you sometimes miss social cues, so apologise if you read it wrong, but that the fact he mentioned it has been bothering you.

I'm laughing at working class people having a Yorkshire accent! Yorkshire has a bigger population than Scotland. Are they all working class?

Frankly I think it is quite self aware for someone so steeped in privilege (i.e. A white, mc, educated male) to own up to it!!

"It was the tone of how he said it. However, since I'm autistic I definitely miss social meanings so that could be the reason for my confusion."

My guess would be that you read the smug tone correctly but misunderstood why it was smug.

As pp have said: he was virtue signalling.

Not sure why he would need to say it, surely the facts would speak for themselves

Royalty aren't upper class. They are royalty.

sorry. is not are.
Silly me, betraying my middle class ignorance to MN.

Why would I say I'm not MC? Because I'm such a mixture. One of my parents is from a very WC background and the other MC. I would have a reasonable inheritance from my parents & I went to quite a 'posh' school but I'm a beauty therapist. Most of my family have professional jobs on my dad's side but administrative on my mums side. I suppose my underachieving has partly to do with my autism I have to do things I'm comfortable with. But I love beauty. My interests are quite MC and I read many many books. But reading books is the way I understand the world because I'm autistic. So I'm a prolific reader.

I do see what you mean about this guy though now that you have explained it.

From that description it seems to me that you have as clear an idea as any of us about what 'middle class' means - socially culturally and economically! Sure, these are not clear-cut categories and none of us fit the box precisely - my two sets of grandparents come from about as opposed ends of the class spectrum as it's possible to get - but by and large the English are schooled from the earliest of ages to know the nuances of different class positions, including down to where you don't 'fit'. This isn't a good thing, clearly, but it is what it is, and I do think it's a bit disingenuous when people say 'oh I have no idea what class is' - they do, really, they just don't want to spell it out.

I think unlimited has it right though!

I'd rather date someone who admits he's middle class than a working class man who disses successful people which I find is often the case. I am not british so I don't give a fuck about class but I think it's almost a national sport to diss richer, more successful people here.

My definition of mc is so standard that it even matches the wiki definition .....Note the professions. Doctors, managers, even lawyers, dont tend to have enough investments to simply not work at all. People who live off investments alone could be middle class but its not a normal definition of middle class that.you could stop work tomorrow (interestingly tho wikipedia says that was the 19th century definition, which I didnt know, but probably decsribed people like lever, rich but not old aristos)

The following factors are often ascribed in modern usage to a "middle class":[by whom?]

Achievement of tertiary education.

Holding professional qualifications, including academics, lawyers, chartered engineers, politicians, and doctors, regardless of leisure or wealth.

Belief in bourgeois values, such as high rates of house ownership, delayed gratification, and jobs which are perceived to be secure.

Lifestyle. In the United Kingdom, social status has historically been linked less directly to wealth than in the United States,[6] and has also been judged by signifiers such as accent (Received Pronunciation and U and non-U English), manners, type of school attended (public school), occupation, and the class of a person's family, circle of friends and acquaintances.[7][8]

I think public school is more upper middle class isn't it (only 5-7% of population so the more ordinary middle class wouldn't necessarily afford it. Leafy comps and all that.)

But yes having attended private school does tend to mark you as not working class!

lottieandmia - you sound like you come from a solidly middle class background to me. Privately educated, you think being a beauty therapist is underachieving, the main breadwinner in your family had a "professional" job, you have "MC" interests. I wouldn't say working in administration is working class, either - sounds like nice, comfortable, office job, lower middle class work to me... and only if both spouses do it, otherwise the family takes on the class of the spouse with higher status...

Wow he absolutely loves his white male privilege doesn't he? & what's the "advantage" in being straight?

Dickhead

what's the "advantage" in being straight?

Are you joking?

This is actually really eye-opening. I would and have said more or less exactly what he did (minus the male part) in order to acknowledge how much of my material success is luck not hard work. I see that as the opposite of bragging and never imagined it might be interpreted as OP or some others on this thread have. I actually judge people who refuse to acknowledge their privilege in this way.

See, there are still people out there with no clue as to how others are discriminated against ...

I also can't imagine understanding that class is important and continues to affect life chances in the UK, but then to declare that ever discussing this is unacceptable.

@MargaretCavendish I agree. It's a way of saying "I know how lucky I am, through no virtue of my own."

I actually judge people who refuse to acknowledge their privilege in this way

I agree with you on this. I would rather be with somone who recognised the world as it is. Their place in it and was honest about it. Than some middle class twat, refusing to accept their own social mobility. sitting on their degree, good salary and proffesional role claiming to be working class because their parents were or they drink pints.

Refuse to label yourself, fair enough, but trying to clearly pretend your something you're not just makes you look like a twat.

I think I can see what you mean. And yes I do get very irritated when I hear people like David Cameron declaring that anyone can set up thief own business and if they don't they're lazy.

Or indeed cameron declaring himself middle class when married to aristocracy. I suppose that really is the 19th century definition. Theres the aristos, all 100 or so plus families, the 'middle classes' (as rich.or richer but not landed gentry), maybe another 1000 or so of them, then 67 million working class, or serfs, at the bottom

Bluntness Your comment was clearly aimed at me, so is class based on background, attitudes and behaviours or isn't it? Is there social mobility or isn't there?

For every comment stating 'once working class, always working class' and 'class being nothing to do with income or employment status', there seems to be as many opinions that education and job defines a person's class.

But if I say that I have never felt oppressed by being of a working class background that's because either I'm too stupid to realise the disadvantages that I have suffered or it makes me a middle class twat refusing to accept how privileged I am.

Hence I will continue to hold the opinion that class is no longer significant for the vast majority of people who fall somewhere along the working/middle class spectrum.

Lottie- there is a brilliant Freudian Typo in your last post!