To be homesick for the UK

[twiney]

I'm a little hungover and had a rough day yesterday and it's triggered a bout of homesickness for the UK. Any other expat MNers feeling homesick for their country?

I miss...

The humorous trashy aspect of Christmas

The free-form approach to womanhood

Pubs

The love of newness and creativity

The acceptance of difference

My friends

The sea and the faded kitschness of coastal towns

The flexible playfulness of using English

There are more. But as Christmas draws nearer and nostalgia kicks in, having tried to integrate here and doing an okay job ploughing on with it, I just wanted to say it out loud: I miss you, UK, I miss your no-nonsense women, an attitude I can still just about hold onto through the various personalities on MN.

I miss you and love you!

Fuck that. This place is a shithole walking backwards in time to a poorer more racist place. Can’t wait to get out.

OP. What is fun about where you are? Are there any expats you could get together for a trashy Christmas with?

Not at all. I left nearly 30 years ago & have no plans to return.
I has occasion to be in the UK for 2 weeks very recently, it was dreadful.
I am so sad that a once proud, courageous and innovative nation is now so down on its uppers.

I think you're remembering it through rose tinted glasses. I moved out of the UK 10 years ago. Every time I go back to visit it reminds me of why we don't live there anymore.

OP I completely get you. I used to feel dreadfully homesick for the UK especially this time of year.

I used to live in NZ where they don't really focus on Xmas this time of year - it's all about the summer and summer holidays. I remember visiting a shopping mall Xmas week and there was a rugby match playing locally. The shopping mall was deserted and I actually felt really sad!

It never felt quite right taking my DS to see Father Christmas who was wearing shorts and jandals (flip flops)

We ended up returning to the UK five years ago as the homesickness escalated.

Is it feasible to come back for a visit?

You don't say where you are, but I think you're looking back with rose tinted glasses OP. It's all pretty shit here at the moment...politicians who don't know their arse from their elbow, excessive, over the top consumption and spending by the privileged few, while more and more people are struggling to pay their bills and put food in the table. Levels of homelessness have gone through through the roof. NHS and Education system are in a complete mess.

And to top it all, it's freezing cold and raining. Enjoy wherever it is you're living!

OP - ignore the PPs, we love living in the UK! (But I guess it’s a diverse place so some places are faring a lot worse than others.) Can you return for a visit soon?

I love the UK. Overall we are a lovely lot. And things continue to improve in terms of tolerance and kindness. But, the goodness in people is always there wherever you are, just sometimes gets distorted by certain aspects of relgion, culture and govt. Happy Christmas!!

How ridiculous to say 'YABU. It's shit.' Firstly, the OP has said what she misses, and those things aren't shit. Secondly, many of the things that are currently shit here are at least as bad or worse in many or even most other countries (with a side-order of other shit stuff in some of them).

YANBU OP. I love it in the UK and would not choose to live anywhere else. The language alone would be too much for me to miss (and I'm an MFL teacher!).

How long have you been in your new country? The first 5-6 years are a rollercoaster of massive highs as well as lows, but after that it settles unless a major life event triggers the rose tinted nostalgia, I found.

So I guess every other single country is perfect then to everyone who hates the UK?

I always dream about leaving the UK for Australia or America. But in reality I think I'd miss it. Not sure why, just nostalgia and familiarity I suppose.

I love my country I wouldn't want to live anywhere else, I wonder why we aren't the country we was, because we are frightened of upsetting anyone who comes here

If you think the UK is racist then you haven't lived or spent time in many other countries.

I love living here. Whenever I go abroad, I always look forward to coming home.

The country has its problems there's no denying that but sometimes it's better the devil you know!

I went through a phase of wanting to move to Kansas Missouri with our friend who married a stunning American until this American pointed out to me that she lives in a highly racist and rough area and she felt safer in the UK!

There's nothing wrong with missing home.

We lived in NZ for 4 years, and moved back to the UK 2 years ago. I miss NZ terribly by moments, but I'm glad we're back. We only came back as my Mum was seriously ill, and it brought home how far away we were. I think we'd have stayed had it not been for that, and Christmas was always the worst time for homesickness, so I'm sending empathetic vibes your way op.

I have to say, anyone that thinks the UK is racist and dreams of moving to NZ or Aus, you're in for a shock, I've never comes across so much blatant racism, homophobia and sexism as I did from Australian and kiwi people. I still miss the beaches, the space and the weather though :-)

OP it's mild, wet, dark and windy. I bet you don't miss that

Some of the things you have mentioned as British I don't quite see but maybe things look different from outside. I can see you really are homesick... hope you will enjoy Christmas wherever you are.

I lived abroad 15yrs ago for 4 years. I cried with homesickness at least once a week. Didn’t help that my in-laws (who are natives) made me feel unwelcome. When I landed back at Gatwick for the last time, I could have kissed the tarmac!

Those that say the uk is racist clearly have lived in many other countries.
I’ve live in Saudi, Indonesia, Japan and the UAE. Believe me when I say we are one of the most tolerant, diverse, un- racist countries there is!!

YANBU, op. I've been in your position and missed the UK dreadfully, especially at Christmas.
I came back and am very happy here.

It helps to have your home comforts and traditions abroad at Christmas. We'd have a traditional British Xmas dinner and Xmas crackers, while listening to traditional music.

It's OK to miss stuff.
It's ok to grieve for the things you can't have.
It's ok to know the grass can be greener on both sides.
It's ok to be jealous of those flying home for Christmas.

Counting the days til I fly somewhere that there us wine, and tacky music, and build up and excitement. And ideally snow one day (sorry UK, I know your all freezing andcsliping and sliding about)

I rather liked Christmas in nz precisely because it didn't start until a few days before and disappeared on the 26th. Here it is months of tat and whining!

I note that the UK whiners ( who know where the exit is) dont mention our glorious spring, hot summer and beautiful autumn. However they are probably trapped in London, poor buggers.

I can totally understand missing friends, and pubs (if like me you like beer). Perhaps some of the faded towns.

Though if we could earn about two-thirds of current income and did not have elderly relatives, we would have left a long time ago.

YANBU! Can you get hold of some British goodies, just for you? How about downloading a cheesy album, Bradley Walsh has one out ?

The UK is going through a really bad time but its not shit like some other posters are saying. Racism exists in other countries and people who whine about all the immigrants coming over here, well that could be because they're leaving behind worse conditions in their own country. Think of some other countries human and women's rights. On the whole we could have it far bloody worse, imagine having Trump as your president

OP YANBU, I would hate to feel homesick too, can you somehow try and recreate a Cheesy British day somehow? All the things you like and miss? An afternoon cream tea, listening to a CD of British artists, watching British films followed by a good old roast dinner.