Not sure if IABU and a bit mean to a friend so was interested in views.
I have a close male friend, let's call him Fred. Fred and I are very close friends and have never been more (I am in a relationship) but recently some things have made me wonder whether I should continue.
Fred is desperate to meet "the one" and get married and settle down and so on, and it's something we end up talking about a lot as I seem to have become is go-to for these sorts of conversations. He dates a lot and seems to have plenty of women keen but the ones he likes back don't seem to work out for various reasons.
But I have been finding some of his comments a little icky and uncomfortable recently, and wondered if I am being too harsh. For example:
- Meeting girls in bars then saying to me "she's not wife material"
- Saying of another female friend of his that he messages often "I'd sleep with her but not marry her" (this unprompted)
- Never saying so explicitly but implying that he is not attracted to me (which is fine in itself but still is uncomfortable)
- Being critical of my partner (I work very hard to shut this down but it keeps popping up)
- Asking me 'can you help me find a wife?'
- Telling me details about his life I'm not sure I want to know ie sex life related things
I find it icky but he's going through a tough time and don't know if I'm being harsh