I need a bloody toy soldier like 'the grand old duke of York'

[SkaPunkPrincess]

So I have just sat and done DC1's Santa letter with him. We have talked a lot about how it would be really cool for Santa to bring him a super cool blue big boy scooter with two wheels (His main gift) and for months this has been agreed that it's what he would ask Santa for.

But noooooo this morning he insists he has changed his mind and won't accept anything other than a fucking 'grand old duke of York toy soldier.

I am now panicking and cant find anything that hits the mark online. please help mumsnet!

Like an old fashioned tin soldier?

There's loads of nutcracker type soldiers in the shops now, would that work?

What does he mean? Little model soldiers or more of a nutcracker toy? If you Google nutcracker toys you gets kits of soldier puppetry. How old is he?

Im sure you can get nutcrackers like this. Would this do? www.amazon.co.uk/gp/aw/d/B00QE2U2VK/ref=mp_s_a_1_4?ref=plSrch&dpPl=1&dpID=41hKxuWN4lL&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_FMwebp_QL65&tag=mumsnetforum-21&ie=UTF8&qid=1513416465&sr=1-4

He is 4. Would a nutcracker be safe as a toy?

We have one of these wooden Xmas decorations - it's on a stand but the mouth moves

The story, not a real nutcracker.

Lots of wooden ones, fewer metal unless you want to spend a lot. www.amazon.co.uk/s/?hvlocphy=1006816&hvptwo&hvnetw=g&keywords=wooden+toy+soldier&hvadid=196722907320&index=aps&hvpone&hvlocint&ref=pd_sl_zvvvbl9xw_b_p27&hvpos=2t1&hvdev=t&hvdvcmdl&hvqmt=b&tag=mumsnetforum-21&ie=UTF8&hvtargid=kwd-304587848344&hvrand=11439138155322214301

I didn't mean an actual nutcracker, there's some wooden ones that are just decorative.

I have just tried to probe a bit further and he doesn't know what he means 😐

He was a general in the Coldstream Guards in the Napoleonic Wars, so any of those specialist shops for grown ups who want to play soldiers should have something close enough.

He was actually Prince Frederick of somewhere (ex-boyf who was ex-Coldstream Guardsman told me, I don't actually know this shit!)

The basic uniform in those days was white or off-white trousers, red cutaway coat (like a tailcoat, but more cut away at the front) for officers and someone as senior as a general would probably have had one of those fore-and-aft hats.

You could possibly improvise, if you're one of those creative, crafty people. Now I've thought about it, it would be a lovely outfit for a teddy bear.

Sorry, just realised I've got completely the wrong end of the stick!

Show him some pictures?

TKMaxx, have a big selection of the wooden toy type things, I think they're intended to be Christmas decorations but my son loves them and plays with them whenever we're in there. They're about a foot tall.

My concern with the ornamental nutcrackers is they won't be designed or tested as children's toys?
I don't want it falling apart in 5 minutes or risk of small parts as I also have a 18 month old DC2 that will definitely get hold of it.

A lot of the old metal ones for sale will be lead so avoid those.

This is extortionate but accurate www.mklmodels.co.uk/wb43024-private-2nd-coldstream-guard-1822-3881-p.asp

Se are sold as skittles, but might be acceptable? www.orangetreetoys.com/soldier-skittles.html

Budkins sell a soldier: www.countysleepshop.co.uk/toys/dolls-houses/le-toy-van-budkins-sentry-box-and-soldier-shrewsbury-shropshire-uk.html?tag=Budkin

Try looking at traditional toys shops. Particularly anywhere that sells castles?

Bear factory bear and an outfit? Teddy bears are Santa's speciality

What about these skittles? There’s only one set left though.

You could always write him a letter back saying I will do my best but it's very close to Xmas and my elves are very busy in the toy shop. Maybe get mummy to help you think of something and next year write to me early.
I did that with DS once.. I can't remember what he asked for but it was impossible and as you have I'd already got everything and thought I'd convinced him what he would ask for

He was made up with that letter.. Sweetened with some choc coins. And then they normal letter saying the normal you've been. Good boy stuff lol

As in Medieval Edward Duke of York or "Grand old Duke" rhyme? Not actually build a bear but a similar company who also stuffs bears and has clothes etc that does a lot big trade shows has a medieval soldier type costume if that would work? Can't remember the name but they're everywhere, maybe build a bear does too I haven't been in.

Ask him to draw a picture of what he means?

He’s 4, give it a week and he will want an astronaut that spurts rockets. He won’t be disappointed or scarred for life once he sees his scooter and realises what he wants is a toy not basically an ornament. Which he’s probably seen on an advert somewhere so once Christmas is over he won’t be reminded of it

Thewhy as in the nursery rhyme.

Leave a note with his scooter (which I assume you already have) saying that "mummy told me you might like this" or something.

Pretty certain he'll be too busy playing with his new scooter to be disappointed!

How about this?

Playmobil Beefeater Plush soft 12" - Deluxe Edition https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B074XLSHWR/ref=cmswwrcppapi_eqsnAb86907S4