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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Taking baby to work

67 replies

creameyespinklips · 16/12/2017 07:39

My job requires me to work one evening and ever other weekend. There's no way around this.

It involves calling on vulnerable people. Most of them are 15 min calls, they don't need much. A cup of tea and medication usually.

My marriage has been awful lately, I'm feeling like i can't possibly stay. The problem is money. I am not a high earner anyway and I can't afford to give up my job.

Since I can't get childcare for evenings and weekends wibu to take my baby with me in my car and leave her for short periods as I make my calls?

OP posts:
GnomeDePlume · 16/12/2017 08:33

just a thought but is there anyone you could double up with? you both go out in the same car and cover both rounds. At their clients you can stay in the car with your baby and at your clients you go in and they stay in the car?

Not ideal but might work?

Addictedtothisbloodyforum · 16/12/2017 08:33

Why can't your dh look after the baby ??

Original poster
creameyespinklips · 16/12/2017 08:34

Because in this hypothetical situation we would have split up.

OP posts:
AreThereAnyUsersnamesLeft · 16/12/2017 08:34

Are you sure you can't manage maths?
As long as you take it slowly and put in the time, most people who think they can't do maths, absolutely can manage to do GCSE maths.

Colleges often do courses for people who missed out on English or maths GCSE first time round. But if you really really struggle with maths, you'll need to practice loads outside class. If you are thinking about signing up with a College find out how much support they offer outside of lessons - including do they offer online help that you can access without having to go into the building.

There are brilliant online (simple) online lessons as well.There are loads on Youtube If you really struggle with maths, don't expect to understand something on your first try. If one video that you watch or lesson you try makes no sense, watch someone else explain it.

You will find that you learn something - you think "yay I get it now!" and then forget it almost straight away - this is normal - once you've re-learned it a few times, it will go in. I do know it won't be easy if you have childcare and work as well.

I hope you do find an answer - it sounds like a big challenge. I would check that you are being paid minimum wage by the way.

LIZS · 16/12/2017 08:38

Just because you split up doesn't mean he can't look after his child while you work. Or pay a babysitter? How many evening calls would you do?

brummiesue · 16/12/2017 08:39

Can't believe you are actually asking this, quite worrying really Hmm9

MsJaneAusten · 16/12/2017 08:39

Reciprocal babysitting? So you agree to mind a friend’s child one evening each week and they mind yours?

MessyBun247 · 16/12/2017 08:42

IF you split and are a single parent on a low income you will get most of your childcare paid for by tax credits, so you can start working during the day rather than evenings and weekends.

MessyBun247 · 16/12/2017 08:46

Also if you explain your situation to your boss they might take you off the evening/weekend shift and put you on days. As really, you don’t have a choice if you can’t get childcare. And I’m sure they wouldn’t want you bringing your baby to work.

Munchyseeds · 16/12/2017 08:47

Please don't take the baby to work and either leave it in the car or take it into clients
You need to work for a decent care company....one that does minimum 1 hour calls, will give you decent pay and help you improve skills.
They do exist in the uk
Good luck

Original poster
creameyespinklips · 16/12/2017 08:50

Lizs I could pay a babysitter but the babysitter would cost more than I'd earn and I need to work to make money not lose it lol.

I don't have any friends who need babysitters.

Messy I would prefer to work during the day but there just aren't jobs. And my boss is actually very understanding she let's me do one evening a week instead of two but I do have to do at least one evening otherwise it's not fair on everybody else. In any case I've still got the same problem during the day. Morning runs start any time between 6 and 7 am and nursery is not open then, but I'd just have to ask not to be put on mornings.

It's not really doable I know. It's hard knowing what to do because I am very scared and unhappy but it isn't right to leave if I can't look after my own children.

OP posts:
SandyBeachandtheDeckchairs · 16/12/2017 08:53

oh, OP, it's horrible when you don't feel like you have any choices in life. I'm not going to lecture you, but just wanted to wish you luck because it sounds like things are tough for you.

ghostyslovesheets · 16/12/2017 08:53

You might get a childminder who would work weekends and maybe evenings - my friend does similar work and her cm does.

Also you can usually do functional skills maths at college or via Learn direct for free - easier than gcse and level 2 is the equivalent of a c at GCSE

WorraLiberty · 16/12/2017 08:53

I would be in and out and she'd be in view at all times.

No she wouldn't I'm afraid.

You'd be making hot drinks, reading medication labels, making eye contact with your clients etc.

You just wouldn't be able to keep an eye on her the whole time.

Ceto · 16/12/2017 08:55

Become a babysitter yourself? It doesn't have to be just for friends.

NeedsAsockamnesty · 16/12/2017 08:56

Seriously your actually thinking this might be even a tiny bit ok?

Both tax credits and UC pay a decent sack towards childcare if your income entitles you to it.
That’s what childcare is for

BunsOfAnarchy · 16/12/2017 08:58

Even if you split up with hubby will he not have access enough to your child to look after baby eow and 1 evening a week?!
Whether he's a reliable or unreliable dad isn't the point. You have to still parent a child together even if you split.

redcaryellowcar · 16/12/2017 09:05

I think others have already said it’s not a great plan to take baby to work, I wanted to add that you need to prioritise keeping yourself safe, don’t stay in a relationship where you aren’t. Secondly you need to speak to your employer about flexible working, it needs to be considered for people with caring responsibilities, you might find acas or citizens advice bureau would be able to advise better on what you can reasonably ask for and expect. Lastly, please believe in yourself, some people find maths tricky, but it’s completely possible to get support in getting the qualifications you need. You probably find you’ve been really unlucky in having not very good maths teachers, it might be worth checking local colleges and asking about maths courses, you will probably be pleasantly surprised that teaching methods have moved on. This will (as you rightly say) open up lots if opportunities for you. Wishing you very best.

Notinmybackyard · 16/12/2017 09:10

Apply to be a childminder? I did this for 10 years to be at home with my children. There’s quite a demand in most places.

Allthecoolkids · 16/12/2017 09:11

Its not ideal, it’s far from ideal, but the OP knows that. OP if I had to do it, I’d take the baby in her car seat (assuming baby seat with handle?) out with me to each visit and leave her just inside the front door while I did my work each time.

Original poster
creameyespinklips · 16/12/2017 09:16

Not sure I was thinking seriously. Just trying to think of a way forwards and thinking lots of different things. If and I don't think we will but if we did split I don't know what would happen with children but you don't always get the same shifts per week so even if he had themade every Wednesday it wouldn't work. Plus I won't leave if he gets unsupervised access I don't think and he would so I will stay but like I say I'm just thinking of different stuff.

OP posts:
DontCallMeCharlotte · 16/12/2017 09:18

Could you apply to work as admin in the head office of this - or perhaps a bigger - company? Your language skills are fine and you have relevant "product" experience. It's 9-5, the salaries are better so hopefully it would make it economically viable for nursery etc. until your child starts school. Good luck Flowers

Kitsharrington · 16/12/2017 09:19

Is there another parent at work that you could take turns looking after each other’s children that one night a week and every other weekend?

Original poster
creameyespinklips · 16/12/2017 09:20

I did apply for a couple of those in fact Charlotte but didn't have any luck, some companies can be quite nepotism based

OP posts:
Original poster
creameyespinklips · 16/12/2017 09:21

No kit it is quite difficult getting people to have your kids

OP posts:
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