AIBU re finding out sex of baby

[Mummytea24]

AIBU to ask why those people who do not find out the sex of their baby at the 20 week scan look down their noses at those of us who do?

By ‘middle class’ though, do you mean private school and has owned at least one pony as a child, or reasonable state school in a commuter town and owned guinea pigs as a child?

I'm talking private school but no ponies..

Thank you!

I’ve had both experiences. I don’t judge either way. Just as I don’t judge whether people choose breast,bottle or mixed, cloth or disposable, etc. Not my child, not my choice.

Though the only thing I wanted after giving birth was a cup of tea, so I may not be the best person to comment 😂 In my defence, I love my children more than anything.

Struggling to see how some think it's a working class thing. At my antenatal group I was the only one who hadn't found out and everyone else was much better off financially than me :-S we only lived in that very middle/upper class area due to being in tied accommodation with our jobs, but finding out the gender was very much the done thing there.
But that's just my experience of course.
We didn't find out purely because wanted to find out at the birth, but for dc2 I haven't decided whether to find out or not.

My brain works exactly like batshite and Jacqueshammer.

A baby T-rex would be a surprise. A human infant not so much. we

YANBU. It’s definitely considered more posh and cool not to find out. I don’t care though. I’m expecting and found out even earlier than 20 weeks as the sonographer told me at a reassurance scan. It meant a lot to me as the sex is the same as my last baby, which I lost.

Agree with former babe...I work in a finance company, you should have seen the horror at the fact I was finding out the sex. Middle classers never want to find out and like everything from the nursery to outfits to be white and grey, never pink or blue !

Oh n apparently “it gives you more incentive to push”....err trust me the incentive to push is to get the bloody birth done with

formerbabe I totally agree....but again that's just what I have observed from my local area and social circle etc

Formerbabe I think you're onto something there.
That totally fits with my friends and me.

I found out with DS for a few reasons, it helped me with making it feel more real and bonding (3 miscarriages left me unconvinced I would actually ever give birth) and for my DSC to feel involved (they came to the private scan. I definitely had people telling me it's 'better' to not find out and felt as though finding out was a bit common.

I couldn't give two shits what they thought it was our choice and that's that, but I definitely noticed it.

I didn't find out with mine as the trust didn't offer that service DD did with one and three with two she did and her comment was that she was so exhausted she couldn't have cared if she had a boy, girl or elephant .

We didn't find out as we thought, given there were so many not-so-great surprises in pregnancy, that it would be a nice surprise either way.

I also have a friend who found out she was having a boy and then gave birth to a girl so had to hurry 5 months of name choice conversation over a few weeks. We preferred to come up with two names with time on our side.

But can see why people would choose to know so no judgement of others.

I know what you mean
I quite honestly WAS that person until we had the opportunity to find out, in which I crumbled.

I found out, still managed to buy fairly neutral stuff.

I didn't want to find out, not because I wouldn't be able to buy neutral stuff, but because everyone else in my family wouldn't!

Unfortunately my DH was desperate to know, and I didn't want to take that away from him over practical considerations of baby clothes.

So we found out and were duly submerged in pink pink and only pink clothes that wont be as useful for future male children as the neutral ones I would have preferred....