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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Can't afford Christmas/summer good behaviour school trip then come in uniform and work all day.

78 replies

Thebandsmostmonthly · 13/12/2017 07:04

Possibly being a bit sensitive.
School run two trips a year which are not educational but purely a treat for good behaviour, usually a theme park and Christmas markets. My children are new to the school.

If you can't afford or can't go for whatever reason then you stay behind with the ones who have been excluded from the trip, have to come in in full uniform when everyone else is in home clothes, they get a special breakfast etc and you have to sit there while they do etc and work all day.
Even though they have to work all day they don't even put on a proper education. Most of the school is out so we've been told on the summer trip they did some worksheets with a teacher in the morning and then spent most of the day on their phones.

AIBU to think they could stump to a couple of dvds and a tub of popcorn for those left behind?

OP posts:
JacquesHammer · 13/12/2017 08:07

I'd keep mine off. Let them have a fun day at home.

It's absolutely appalling that school are puttting on treats that exclude qualifying kids on the basis of income.

At DD's school for treat afternoon they get to pick an arts/crafts session, movies, games up on the field/computers.

Believeitornot · 13/12/2017 08:08

Well you’ve left it a bit late to do something about it.....

I feel sorry for your dcs and I would have spoken to the school as soon as I knew about it.

So I would apologise to the dcs and they’ll have to be sent in I assume because you have to go to work?

g1itterati · 13/12/2017 08:08

OP, I think you should name and shame the school. This is appalling!

My DC are at an independent school where about 15% are bursaries. Every summer each child chooses an "activities week" trip - most of them are abroad and at least £500 plus spending. There is a policy that no child should be excluded from anything, be it trips, uniform, music lessons, etc on the basis of income and there is a fund to support anyone who can't afford anything.

In this case, if school does not have a fund to help those who need it, they should not run the trip at all. How many will not be going today?

g1itterati · 13/12/2017 08:10

And yes, I would just keep the DC home.

YetAnotherSpartacus · 13/12/2017 08:19

I'm on another thread where the big theme is inclusivity for SEN children, but surely inclusivity is also about ensuring that children of all means can attend reward and educational trips? Maybe this might mean subsidising some children or maybe it might mean re-thinking the kinds of trips that the school organises to make them more accessible for all children?

3awesomestars · 13/12/2017 08:23

Yes I think that is appalling. My dc school do similar trips but run fun activities for kids that don’t go. In the summer it was a theme park, my ds and all his mates chose not to go so they could play football all day at school.

I would certainly have a chat with the school if this was my children.

WindyWindy · 13/12/2017 08:26

Another one who would keep them at home.

HuskyMcClusky · 13/12/2017 08:28

That’s really, really off. Angry

Ceto · 13/12/2017 08:28

I love the idea that schools - whose budgets are being slashed left, right and center and who are desperately making cuts so that they can retain teaching staff - have a tidy stash of money just sitting there to pay for a child’s fun outing.

If they can't afford to do good behaviour trips without excluding children whose parents can't afford to pay, then they should either do much cheaper activities or should not have the trips at all.

To those who always advise to “write to the governors” ... have you ever volunteeed to be a governor at your school? Just what magical powers do you think these people who volunteer their free time have?

Longstanding school governor here. In a situation like this, they have the power and indeed the duty to question the head about why they are running these trips in such a blatantly unfair and exclusionary way; and they need to know this is going on.

ReanimatedSGB · 13/12/2017 08:28

I would suggest you write to the governors and complain that these trips are excluding for lower-income pupils and that there should be more affordable alternatives. It's a perfectly reasonable point to make.

Original poster
Thebandsmostmonthly · 13/12/2017 08:30

'Believeitornot

Well you’ve left it a bit late to do something about it.....

I feel sorry for your dcs and I would have spoken to the school as soon as I knew about it.

So I would apologise to the dcs'

Believeitornot did you miss the bit where I said when I spoke to dc they absolutely didn't want me to contact school and ask because they wouldn't have any spends anyway and everyone was planning to go to Five Guys?

we had three days to find the money. I did try to speak to the finance person one day but they weren't in and when dc found out they wanted me to leave it.

Tbh they said they didn't mind not going and it was only this morning when one dc joked they might sneak on the bus to Leeds to meet their mates that they admitted they were bothered.

My issue is not that they can't go on the trip but more that it shouldn't be an all or nothing.
Even if it was a child with disabilities who couldn't walk far, they wouldn't be able to trek round shops and markets for five hours so give an alternative option for those who can't go.

Staff have to remain in school for them so why not allow them to bring in movies, stump up for some popcorn or at least let them do something fun in school they don't usually get time for.

OP posts:
Original poster
Thebandsmostmonthly · 13/12/2017 08:38

From what I've been told last year everyone went to the Christmas markets bar the ones in isolation and around 15 didn't go to the theme park.

There are four not going to the markets this year. Ironically the trip costs £15 to go by bus to somewhere local the kids can go for free and many pass on their way home. We were told much of that cost was insurance.

OP posts:
EtInTerraPax · 13/12/2017 08:38

Yeah, our school do movies in school for good behaviour- the pupils 'pay' with their merit points IYSWIM, which means all those that have been working hard and polite, kind etc can go (many would meet the criteria!).
It's not even a school with many on low incomes, it's just more aware of eliminating differences for those that are.

Sleepyblueocean · 13/12/2017 08:44

The school shouldn't be running any whole school trips where children are excluded because of inability to pay.

g1itterati · 13/12/2017 08:49

I can't believe in this day and age a school would carry on like this!
Maybe if you had rung the school they could have subsidised the trip and given them £10 each for Five Guys? Or worked out a plan - even if you had to pay them back £2 per week or something next term or when you can? The DC wouldn't have needed to know.

astoundedgoat · 13/12/2017 08:51

That's awful, OP. At our schools here there is significant income disparity and both schools my dc's go to are SUPER conscious about avoiding activities that exclude people (parents or children) on financial grounds. It would just never happen.

Definitely bring it up with the school.

whiskyowl · 13/12/2017 08:54

Please, please raise this with the governors.

I was that kid at school. While everyone else went to Alton Towers or ice skating, I was stuck in school. One year they made me clean out the school pond. It was stagnant, full of pondweed, and it stank. Another year I had the privilege of cleaning what felt like 10,000 test tubes. When I got a bit older, I just skived school that day with mates.

e1y1 · 13/12/2017 08:55

Agree with others, there is absolutely no way this should be happening, it’s segragation based on ability to afford.

The kids have either been good or they haven’t. Why haven’t school set up a fund for this? If every parent handed in a £5 per child every month/few months, this would be doable for all but the most hard up of people (and then the excess from the dontations could cover these kids and then the excess is for other events etc, then the school just sort out the trip).

Awful.

ColonelJackONeil · 13/12/2017 08:56

I do think you should speak to the school governors too. As you say there are plenty of people just above the threshold for pupil premium who won't be able to afford this sort of trip where the kids need quite a bit of spending money on top of the price of the trip.

If they do want to do this sort of trip it should be more optional with an equally fun day at school for those who can't afford it as you suggested.

EdinaMonsoon · 13/12/2017 08:58

At all the schools my DV have attended there has been a policy of inclusion irrespective of ability to pay. The practice has been to notify parents of the activity with a statement along the lines of “please contact HT if finance is an issue” (not that blunt but you get my drift). My understanding is that schools are not permitted to exclude on the basis of ability to pay. They can of course cancel a trip if they don’t have a certain number of paying students since it may not be feasible for the school to fund it.

EdinaMonsoon · 13/12/2017 08:59

DC not DV Hmm

DontMakeMeShushYou · 13/12/2017 09:01

Life isn't fair. It's not fair if your parents can't afford the trip. It's also not fair if you have exemplary behaviour but are quiet in class so don't earn the required number of house points to go on the trips, even though people with far more negative consequence points do get to go.

curryforbreakfast · 13/12/2017 09:02

I can't see them being 'punished'. Sounds like a normal school day to me - wear uniform, turn up, do some work

That IS being punished if your friends are having a lovely day out because their parents have more money than you.

OP, I would have sent them for free on the local bus to meet up with their friends. The whole thing is a joke.

Littlelambpeep · 13/12/2017 09:03

I would write a sharp letter to the Board of Gov, stating how discriminatory it is and affecting the self esteem of your pupils.

How awful!

EdinaMonsoon · 13/12/2017 09:04

This might help

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