To be still grinning at such silliness?

[BoobleMcB]

So I was casually minding my own business, plodding along when I heard a fella on the phone state that:

Well it was clearly Thursday that broke the camel's straw...

I just about rounded the corner chuckling to myself hoping he didn't notice 😂

What other common sayings have heard people say wrong?

"Think you're on a sticky wicky there...." (said my work colleague to me today)

My DS says ‘bless me’ when he sneezes .... he’s 25 😂

DH once said (jokingly), ‘Wife or no wife, I can still divorce you’ - he’s a solicitor .

He also said someone was not the sharpest egg in the box.

Then there was the time he told teen DCs to ‘talk to the hand’ and did a sort of talking duck puppet with his hand.

There are many, many more and that’s why I married him!

A friend trying to compliment my ds swimming skills said he’s brilliant he’s “like a fish out of water” several times to me at different swimming lessons.

There’s a long standing doing safreement in our household, is it

Red sky at night, SHEPHERDS delight

Or

Red sky at night, SAILORS delight

long standing argument ffs!

My daughter tonight - Mum keep my chocolate coins in a serious place me - safe place? Dd- no Mum serious place!!

Isn’t his full name Jesus Cried?

Am cracking up at Jester of goodwill and the dog with the normal motions like feeling sad!

My mum used to always say “daytime robbery” instead of “daylight robbery” - sort of makes sense!

My mum is notorious for these
He’s built like a shit brick house (it was years before that made any sense to me, I never realised she was saying it wrong)
It’s a doggy dog world
No holes barred
Nip it in the butt
For all intensive purposesi
And my personal favourite ... it went down like a lead baboon!

Put the shits of God up him 😀

As gay as a badger?

My mum once told me to take a short walk off a long pier. I've never let her forget that. She told me to do it because I was taking the piss out of her for saying "You'll have to speak up, I haven't got my glasses on". This was 20 years ago too, so she couldn't even blame old age .

ex colleague said 'going off on a tandem'

Snorted at this

This thread is fabulous! I've actual for real laughed out loud a a lot of them.

My favourite is a mere morsel 😅

Also I remember years ago I was staying in a hostel and there was a Korean guy who had a phrase book of English sayings, he loved learning them. The only problem was whoever wrote the book either mixed them up by accident or on purpose. So he wanted to know "what means, a husband in the hand is worth two in the bush"...

For ages I thought it was tight legged tiger, not tight like a tiger. It wasn't until I was trying to be funny and draw a tight legged tiger that my hubby realised what I had been saying 😂

in our family, when someone asks something really obvious we all chorus "go and lick the purple cat".
It all started when my DD misheard the saying "is the Pope a Catholic" when she was tiny. (give the purple cat a lick)

DS used to be OCD about having his headphones round the right way. When I said it didn't matter he said 'won't the music be back to front?'

I ended up being branded a racist once after announcing there were too many Indians. I meant chiefs, obvs.

My 13yo DS asked me if the invictus games were like the paraletic games 🤣

I used to work in a department where we dealt with the company's recognised trade unions. One of them once published a briefing (to literally thousands of employees) saying 'sometimes you just have to grasp the bull by the nettles'. Cue great hilarity in our office !!

My sister asked for ‘shitted feet’ in John Lewis instead of ‘fitted sheets’. The Sales assistant replied ‘not the last time I looked’ and looked down at her feet. Had everyone in stitches .... (my sis has come out with many classics over the years).