To feel my values are out of place?

[moutonfou]

I was brought up to have a strong sense of conscientiousness and duty to others, i.e. basic manners, kindness, sharing, civic responsibility e.g. recycling, not littering, picking up dog poop, letting buses out, giving to charity, etc.

I always thought this was the norm but increasingly I'm dismayed by the world around me. There seems to be so much crime, greed, meanness, etc. I feel everything has become rather harsh and cynical and self-focused. I know things like littering and pushing into traffic aren't big things but they smack of someone who doesn't think they have a stake in society or a responsibility to others. I just got stung for £120 by someone who stole my card details, and people's reaction has very much been 'it happens'. It shouldn't happen! I can't imagine what kind of person wouldn't think 'no, that money doesn't belong to me.'

Is it just a vocal/visible minority making me feel this way or am I now completely unusual for thinking we should all have some basic decency towards each other?

I don't think your values are out of place. But there are now plenty of people whose only thought is for themselves and possibly their immediate family and fuck anyone else.

I'm with you there OP. I feel like (winning the lottery and) buying a remote island somewhere where I can escape mankind entirely (until I need something fixing)

There's always been rude, dishonest, unkind, thoughtless people. It's not a new thing.

I feel the same way OP. People seem very insular and care only about themselves and their immediate family. I find it quite depressing.

This really isn't new.

It’s not new, but it’s definitely more prevalent.

I think what is different now to say 30 years ago, is people's willingness to challenge others with respect to anti social behaviour.

In the past if people saw someone, especially a teen / child being antisocial they would be more likely to pull them up on it. Now, people don't want to get involved, fear a mouthful of abuse or physical violence. (Some) parents stick up for their child if told off by others, rather than backing up the complaint.

Definitely not a new thing. Dickens made a living writing about the very people you describe. And as for theft, that will always exist where there is inequality in society. Doesn't make it right though!

It really depends on who you are. I see people do this kind of thing all the time but the people that I associate with would never do such things, if I saw an aquaintence behaving this way I would drop them.

i don't think it's more prevalent. In the past we would only know about the examples that happened in our immediate vicinity- now we are aware of arseholery all over the world.

Capitalism

Social media! People are more aggressive and argumentative (and if you don't agree you are screamed down as being whatever-ist).

It may be that things are getting worse as it becomes clearer that the rich and well connected are stealing from everyone else with impunity, and it begins to look more and more like rules and laws are just there to keep the poor submissive and silent...

I think it's an ongoing affect of capitalism too.

I think is just human evolution. People are more selfish and grabby.

great post SGB

social media also plays a part in this

Social media facilitates it I think.

It is more prevalent, even a few years ago, you didnt have these, acid attacks, knife crimes, mind you, a lot of people are their own worst enemies, they walk along on their megga bucks phones. Off to my local shop, now and will be picking up litter as I go!

I suppose when you have the us president normalising personal attacks and insults via social media that really isn't helping.

I disagree.

I think the majority have the same values.

It only takes one or two knobheads to have an impact.

Vocal and emboldened arse holes!

"It is more prevalent, even a few years ago, you didnt have these, acid attacks, knife crimes,"

When are you talking about?

I think all humans naturally fear strangers and care for their nearest and dearest. With education, this can change and one's horizons expand. While I agree with the OP's general points about community responsibility and do all of those things myself there is a balance- our brains can only take so much and worrying too much about wider issues upon which we can only exercise a small amount or no influence can cause anxiety and depression.

This is exactly how I feel. DH says that I have very high standards...

I have noticed it very much over the last ten years. I think WW2 brought us together as a country and wealth distribution was far more equal. Fast forward to the Thatcher years it all got a bit grabby but most people were doing fairly well. Now we have massive variance in wealth distribution and lots of people at the bottom are struggling. Lots of people are in survival mode.

Not really sure what the solution is. I will continue to let people out in traffic, help grannies across the road, pick up litter and generally be kind, polite and thoughtful. Like another poster, I won't tolerate people who aren't like that.