To just say why I haven't worked in 14 years

[RumTumTiger]

So trying to return to work (basic admin) after 14 year absence. Previously worked for a CEO as PA.

When I talk to employers I get asked every single time why I have not worked in so long. I say I was SAHM. It doesn't seem to satisfy them.

Maybe it's the length of time off work they don't like? It has ended up being so long as we moved twice for my XH's work and also DS having to be home schooled/special schools/ therapies that he needed a parent around full time. DS is older now and mostly sorted out so I am free-ish now to earn some money for myself (and now I am a single mum).

So that's the real reason as I never planned on SAHM for so long. (no offense meant to SAHMs by choice).

Would IBU to say family member needed care so I couldn't work? Would employers look more favourably on my long absence or would it be providing too much personal info? Should I put it in my cover letter?

I am getting really down about trying to find work and I feel it's the employment gap holding me back.

(And yes I have done skills upgrading, resume upgrading, job centre, career fairs, etc, tried to get volunteer work but couldn't get anything that used my skills)

I would focus on getting a job within teaching of some description, perhaps as a tutor / special needs tutor. As a tutor you could be your own boss so the only people interviewing you would be prospective clients
There is a shortage of teachers but in my experience only poor schools recruit unqualified non-specialist teachers (does the OP even have a degree)

As a tutor, the market is saturated with people who know what they are doing and have a peoven track record for 11+/SATS/GCSE/A level. Again, why would a parent pay someone with zero knowledge of the subject / system to tutor?

I also second temp work in parallel and beef up any voluntary done during the time off

Something will come up and temping is a good way to get a feel for what’s what and to beef up skills OP

Hang on in there something will come up eventually

I'm about to start looking again and I haven't worked for fourteen years either. It's so daunting. I'm going to be honest - but my circumstances were very different. My husband travels a lot for work and we were living overseas and nowhere near the schools my kids were at. I had to be at home whether I wanted to or not.

I think you're right in your instinct that saying that you were a cater might ring alarm bells re extra time off. If I were you I would say that I was home educating.

Being a SAHM is fine but 14 years is a long time to do that if no other issues. Not really. Why should it be.

I was advised to put home responsibilities on my CV. Worked out just fine. I wouldn't lie or embellish your details, could trip you up in the future.

Never ceases to amaze how little respect this role gets by so many people. It's of major importance. Good luck with your job hunting.

Honestly, don't list out your responsibilities at home as if they were paid employment. You will always hear if people who did this and got jobs - they got the role in despite of doing that or found a very unusual recruiter.

The thing is, the recruiter doesn't care. The recruiter does ask that stuff too, or has a spouse who does it for them and doesn't think of it as a job.

We do care about things like being a school governor or the deputy of scouts or charity fundraiser of Xty thousand when you ran the PTA, or the excel skills you developed running the Christmas fair budget. We don't care about organised your laundry is.

I love the idea of a quick sentence to explain the gap because gaps do need explaining - sahm due to additional needs, child now gained independence skills, keen to get back to work, here's how I've kept my skills up to date.

Do NOT put all the transferable skills you’ve learned as a parent in your CV. Don’t do it!! Unless you have something specific and useful such as another language, Treasurer for a voluntary organisation etc.

There was a thread about this a while back and the overwhelming consensus was that employers do not like seeing parent skills on CVs.

A single line such as ‘career break to raise family and caring duties (now stopped.)’ is enough.

But please don’t put a long list of parent skills on - it will impact you negatively

Yes, you’ve taken time away from paid employment to bring up a family but you’ve also retrained as a teacher for both primary and secondary school levels. Not only that, you’ve progressed from standard teaching to that of someone with very specific special needs teaching skills. Even better, you’ve had success with your son, so you’ve got a proven track record that your teaching was very effective

Have I missed where the OP says she has retrained as a primary school teacher?

Or are you saying that looking after your own child is just as good as retraining as a primary, secondary and special needs teacher?