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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

If I’m breastfeeding, can my baby be admitted with me to hospital

61 replies

LloydColeandtheCoconuts · 03/12/2017 08:46

Advice really.

I’m awaiting SELDOC to call back. I have a severe sore throat and suspect quinsy - I’ve had it before and remember all the pain and symptoms. Last time I had it I was admitted to hospital for a couple of days. But I was child free then.
My AIBU is would WIBU to ask if DD (4months) could be admitted with me. I’ve never seen or heard of this before but I wonder if it’s allowed. I have been ebf. Would it be ridiculous? I am in a current fog of painkillers so may not be thinking logically.
Thanks

OP posts:

Ecureuil · 03/12/2017 10:00

I was brought a hospital grade pump from the maternity ward even though I had baby with me, just in case I needed it.

SonicBoomBoom · 03/12/2017 10:00

So much pain from engorgement** to clarify.

The awful painful infection I had was a treat in comparison to the engorgement.

SandyY2K · 03/12/2017 10:03

I suspect they will risk assess whether this would be harmful to your baby first. I'm sure you wouldn't want her getting ill from any infection in hospital.

Munchyseeds · 03/12/2017 10:03

My DH had quintet 15 years ago and was admitted for a week. DD had it this year and just went in for the day so I think things may have changed
Hope all goes well and you feel better soon

OhGood · 03/12/2017 10:04

Oh my god I am completely horrified by these experiences. Can't imagine how awful it was for you to be extremely ill and also separated from an EBF baby. I am so sorry.

For contrast, my baby was admitted at about 10 days old. She spent about a week in the Horton and a week in the John Radcliffe. I was with her, and in our own room, for all of that time. I now feel incredibly lucky.

Runningbutnotscared · 03/12/2017 10:07

In my recent experience, as pp said, no babies on an adult ward. No babies over 4 months on a maternity ward.
Got round it by staying on adult ward during the day with the baby and going home at night.
Wasn't easy but the best they could do. I was grateful but exhausted.

ferrier · 03/12/2017 10:12

The short answer is yes they should facilitate it by putting you in a private room.
If you need back up get in touch with infant feeding support in your hospital (or whatever name it goes by).

Helspopje · 03/12/2017 10:13

Depends on what you are being admitted for and to where.
I was septiic when my ebf daughter was 4mths. Same area as you as also SELDOC. She cpuldnt come with me for multiple reasons - forst no single room, secondly i was so sick they wanted ready acess to my bedside if i crashed.
Ultimately i went in a single room and my husband brought her in each 3h day and night for feeds.

frogsoup · 03/12/2017 10:13

All I want to say is good luck. The theory and the practice can be two very different things - when my micro-prem baby was on NICU there was once nowhere for me to express except in the medicines cupboard, with doctors wandering in and out - and that only very, very grudgingly once I'd lost it at the nurse!!! And this was in NICU itself, so god knows on a general ward!!!!

frogsoup · 03/12/2017 10:14

It's a good idea for your DH to bring your baby in for every feed though!

Mammyloveswine · 03/12/2017 10:16

I had s breast abscess when ds1 was 7 weeks old... I pretty much demanded he stay with me... the hospital were amazing and nurses even took it in turns to walk him round the hospital so I could get some rest. When I was trsnsferred to another hospital, a young paramedic asked if he could take s photo of my baby as his girlfriend was recently pregnant and he was so excited, it was lovely that my baby was the star of the show! We were in for a week, even when I couldn't feed my baby because of the drugs I was on they still allowed him yo stay. I was in on my first mothers day and got a special breakfast and dh got a Sunday dinner made for him too so it was still special. I'm in Newcastle (Well Northumbria is the trust) and honestly can't believe the amazing care I had..i also still fed him for 18 months until I got pregnant and I think part of that is because I was able to still feed or pump freely in hospital

DailyMaileatmyshit · 03/12/2017 10:37

I had to discharge myself against medical advice when DS was 4 months old. He was a total bottle refuser and starved himself for 11 hours. I was so worried about him dehydrating. His nappies had dried up. But I was really infectious and in an infectious ward so understood why they couldn't allow him in. I fed him in the corridor of the main building whilst they prepared my discharge papers. Poor little thing.

AnnaFender · 03/12/2017 11:15

I was admitted to hospital with an infection in my lung when my ebf baby was 3 days old.

There was a lot of to and froing about how to accommodate us and it was very stressful but they did find somewhere for us (some sort of emergency admissions ward) and were very strict about what staff could come in the room due to infection risk to the baby. They even let DH stay with us as I was too ill/hooked up to lots of machines and couldn't actually care for the baby myself!

After the first night the breastfeeding coordinator was sent to see me and was amazing. She was furious they tried to send baby home. Sorted me with a hospital grade pump (I had to not bf for 24 hours due to one of my treatments) and advice on how to keep up my supply. My advice would be to ask for the breastfeeding coordinator straight away.

I got the impression it wasn't a common occurance as the night I was admitted no one had a clue what to do with us.

shouldnthavesaid · 03/12/2017 11:36

I've looked after a couple of ladies who had a baby in with them . I think both times mum wasn't critically ill or requiring theatre (in that case, most likely a no because no way could she care for baby) but we tried to be acommodiating with a separate room and en suite toilet, provided a cot and allowed dad or another adult to be there during the day. Only difficulty was if the mother was feeling too unwell to care for the baby - it was an additional responsibility on nightshift staff, quite a few of who didnt have children and no experience of paediatric nursing either. Iirc we could ask paeds for help in an emergency eg if mum suddenly became much more unwell.

Never encountered breastfeeding but imagine we'd have allowed storage in kitchen fridge.

We also allowed 1 additional overnight adult in a lot of cases though, for those who would normally need 24/7 care at home (so usually a parent or paid carer), young people under 19 or so with critical or serious illness, all receiving end of life care... we used to provide a bed in the room. Was suggestion of making a separate overnight suite for family in that situation. So I suppose as we were used to it it wasn't a problem , but there's definitely additional issues if mother was to say require emergency treatment/surgery or overnight transfer to a different environment like a HDU. Unlikely but can happen and what happens with the baby then, if noone else is staying?

Roomba · 03/12/2017 11:46

I wasn't allowed to have DS2 in with me when he was 5m old and EBF. I was in for 3 nights and it was horrible - the doctors basically said no way could he stay too and that his dad would just have to give him bottles. He was a bottle refuser and I explained this, still the answer was no. TBH they spoke to me as if I were a bit strange to still be BF at 5m and is if it were some unusual request they'd never had before (as if I'd asked if my 12 year old could stay to breastfeed or something!).

My ex had to bring him in as soon as he could each morning and they stayed most of the day, although staff tried to get them to leave when it wasn't official visiting hours. I had to threaten to discharge myself if they wouldn't let DS stay during the day at least, so I could feed him as much as I could then. Ex and DS went home at 8pm each night and DS just screamed all night long for 3 nights .

They also prescribed medication that couldn't be taken whilst BF and told me to just stop BF. I refused and asked if there was anything else that could be prescribed. I was told no, but I did some online research and suggested a different drug - they went and checked and said yes, that would work and prescribed that instead.

Luckily there was no harm done though DS was very clingy for a few days when I got home. This was in a hospital that is very, very pro BF when you actually give birth and has posters and stickers everywhere promoting BF to new parents. I was too exhausted to make a complaint but probably should have done. Hopefully things have changed in the last couple of years.

Original poster

LloydColeandtheCoconuts · 03/12/2017 12:57

Ok, looks like I will get admitted and they’ve spoken to the Ward who’ve said the baby can come if an adult comes too. My DP can’t due to the demands of DS. Thankfully my brother is able to help out. I’m not sure what’s gonna happen overnight though. I think I’m gonna annoying a lot of people today.
Anyway, thanks for your help.

OP posts:

JennyBlueWren · 03/12/2017 13:14

I was severely dehydrated with severe sickness when DS was a few months old (turned out to be gallstones). Was told that if I couldn't get my hydration levels up I'd be going into the post-natal ward with DS. Thankfully that didn't happen.

DH and I did ask about switching to formula (to help the dehydration and to give me a break) but the doctor explained that my body would continue to produce milk and I'd just be really sore with full breasts instead.

Kr1st1na · 03/12/2017 22:13

Glad you will be with your baby OP and hopefully you will be better very soon.

And well done to your brother for stepping in .

PourMeAGlassOfMilk · 03/12/2017 22:38

Good luck op. I was admitted for a week when ds1 was 5 weeks old and ebf. I was able to keep him with me in a single room. They brought a cot from the postnatal ward.

SD1978 · 04/12/2017 04:43

It is completely up to the hospital and their policy. I work in Australia, the hospital has a
Blanket no policy. We have admitted mothers with babies as young as 5 days old, and they have refused to have the child as well. Told the father he had to go out and hire/buy a pump and bottles, or bring the baby back in every three hours to BF. There is no legal responsibility to ensure a mother stays with a baby here, only that the father can access the ward whenever necessary, day or night- but that they can not stay in the ward. Some hospitals seem to be more accommodating, but it is up to them. All the best and hope that your local is more progressive.

Bowerbird5 · 04/12/2017 05:25

Lucky you. I was refused and what was an overnight stay ended up five days. DH had a hard time with her and brought her in twice a day. She was 7 months old. Hospital actually suggested weaning her before hand!
You could always hire a maternity nurse if you can afford to, go through a nanny agency if you need one.
I hope you recover quickly.

Original poster

LloydColeandtheCoconuts · 04/12/2017 05:38

The hospital have been great and found me a side room and DB is an absolute . The staff explained that the reason I would need an extra person would be to provide assistance for the baby as their duty of care is for me and not DD - a pp said. However they’ve been supportive of me, DD and poor DB (who is currently sprawled on the floor with feet sticking out over a mattress!)
I’m feeling much better after having infection drained by a massive needle and feeling (not envy)by what was inside, hoping I can leave later today too so I get to see DS!
Thanks for sharing your stories and supportive messages. A good day to you all