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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be really quite miffed off with DFriend and to invite someone else instead?

79 replies

K1092902 · 02/12/2017 16:12

So its been a rollercoaster of a year and me and 2 friends decided last month to book a Christmas weekend away- just us 3, no kids or partners.

Anyway we knew were we wanted to stay (been there a few times with the kids and DPs) and i paid in full last month after both friends confirming they were happy with the arrangements and there would be no conflicts with Christmas parties, childcare cover etc I booked and paid in full and both friends paid me their share.

Anyway get a text off one of them last night- apparently her and her DP have decided to buy their daughter a puppy for Christmas and could she possibly have her money back and pay for her share in January?

Im quite gobsmacked to be honest. Its not that i dont trust her to pay her share (ive lent her money before and its always come back) its just I feel its a bit cheeky.

I feel like texting her back and telling her I can give her her money back but will be finding someone else to come on the trip if thats the case.

AIBU?

OP posts:
ThePlatypusAlwaysTriumphs · 02/12/2017 17:54

WHY do people still think buying a puppy at Christmas is a good idea??Xmas Angry. There IS a reason good breeders won't sell puppies at this time and charities won't rehome either. Even if they genuinely have thought long and hard and done all appropriate research, it is literally the worst time to bring a new pet into the family. Mayhem, routine all out of the window, random visitirs, chocolate, lots of small toys/ tree decorations, and people distracted by 100 other things!

Tell her to get Mr Claus to leave a note in her dds sticking that he has put aside a puppy for her to collect in the New Year. That way she won't need to tap you for the money, and will have time to do some proper research

expatinscotland · 02/12/2017 17:55

Have you told her no yet? She's a CF.

PricillaQueenOfTheDesert · 02/12/2017 17:59

Tell her you’ve paid the hotel so you’re sorry but you can’t pay her her share back now.

Sugarpiehoneyeye · 02/12/2017 18:03

Do the puppy a favour, say NO.
Seriously, do say no, she is being a very CF.

FannyFifer · 02/12/2017 18:06

Tell her to ask the hotel the same question as that's where the money is.

Wolfiefan · 02/12/2017 18:09
  1. You don't buy a puppy for a child.
  2. A puppy isn't a Christmas present.
  3. The holiday has been paid for. The money has been spent.
  4. If you can't afford the puppy then you can't afford insurance or vets fees. Don't get it.
HTH you twat! Then see how she feels about the holiday!
YouThought · 02/12/2017 18:10

I'd say no too as I'd be worried about getting the money back at a later date.

ObscuredbyFog · 02/12/2017 18:12

Say no. And tell her straight, puppies are not toys.

FrancisCrawford · 02/12/2017 18:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

JaneEyre70 · 02/12/2017 18:23

I'd just reply and say sorry you have children to buy for too at this time of year. And don't engage any further on it. How bloody cheeky!!

Easyonthetonic · 02/12/2017 18:24

I lent a relative a fair amount of money, after 6 months they paid me £500 (about 1/4 of it). A few weeks later they asked for it back as it had left them short, it was like they thought it was still their money.

bluebells1 · 02/12/2017 18:27

What if you give her the money, she changes her plans because the puppy needs looking after? You will be out of pocket for her share as well. Just say no.

classicchristmas · 03/12/2017 11:10

You just looked perplexed and tell her that the money has been used to pay for the trip obviously.

MillennialFalcon · 03/12/2017 12:26

Why should you be left out of pocket because her partner has taken on a big expense and commitment without telling her?! She needs to be taking this up with him, not you. Just say the money is already spent on the booking as you agreed and you can't afford to lend her any.

MillennialFalcon · 03/12/2017 12:30

Sorry, misread! Not had my coffee yet. It's even worse that she actually agreed to get a puppy when they can't afford it, for some reason I thought her partner had decided unilaterally. Why on earth should you pay for her grand Christmas gesture? And how is she going to pay for the puppy's ongoing needs if she can't afford it in the first place without borrowing money? What an awful idea. Your friend is being really unfair.

BatteredBreadedOrSouthernFried · 03/12/2017 12:32

She’s a twat for buying a puppy on a whim for Xmas. She’s a bigger twat for buying a puppy if she is this skint that she has to borrow money to buy it. She can’t afford a puppy.

HolyShet · 03/12/2017 12:36

Hmm
I wouldn't be pissed of with a friend for asking me for a small loan, if I thought they would repay me without issues. But the manner of asking would

Somethingfantastic89 · 03/12/2017 12:47

Going against what's been said here, but if I could afford it I would give the money to my friend and enjoy my weekend with them. The puppy issue is a different thing, I would say something about that.

PUGaLUGS · 03/12/2017 13:04

Wolfie has it spot on.

tampinfuminragin · 03/12/2017 13:06

What happens with the puppy when you're away with them? Is she likely to cancel the trip because the puppy can't find somewhere to stay?

ItsNachoCheese · 03/12/2017 13:09

wolfiefan has nailed it

MyKingdomForBrie · 03/12/2017 13:16

Yep I would just say ‘oh but I’ve already paid for the cottage’ or whatever it is.

numptyhumpty · 03/12/2017 13:18

Only on Mumsnet do people have these CF friends Shock

MikeUniformMike · 03/12/2017 13:24

Christmas is not the right time to get a puppy.

AlessandroVasectomi · 03/12/2017 13:31

Is it time for another CF Thread? I’ve got a couple of contributions if so.

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