Really upset over ruined surprise

[smileygrapefruit]

More a what would you do?

DH's birthday is soon after Christmas so I ordered a coffee machine in the black Friday deals for his birthday present. We don't spend a lot on each other at Christmas but I spent £200 On this machine which is a lot of money for us.

Ordered from Amazon and at checkout ticked this is a gift and specified Amazon packaging without product details, in case he was the one to take the delivery.

It came today while I was at work so DH took it and it has come in the branded box with a massive picture of the machine on it.

I'm absolutely gutted. Have rung Amazon and they have extended my prime membership by a month as a sorry but that doesn't really make it any better!

[Crumbelina]

Oh what a pain! A friend of mine ordered a "Baby on Board" badge and got it sent to her work. The packaging clearly made reference to a new bundle of joy. She hadn't told work at that stage.

[meowchi]

It normally warns you and gives you an option?

"This item's packaging may indicate what is inside.To cover it, select Deliver in Amazon box on the checkout page."

[Mivery]

I would be upset too, but at this point I don't know what else you can do. You pushed them, you got something free for it. What else can you do? Return it?

[smileygrapefruit]

Meow, I did tick that box and specify Amazon packaging!

Thanks to everyone who has understood why I'm upset.

DH is happy with it but he was trying to console and calm me!! I don't drink coffee so it really was just for him and a larger present than we would usually buy.

We make quite big deals out of birthdays in our family so I'm really not sure what to do.

Options: send it back and get him something different, keep it but don't give him it til his birthday or keep it, open it now and he doesn't get anything on his birthday ????

[Doobigetta]

We've had a few thing from Amazon turn up broken recently because they'd been packed so badly. They must have cut so many corners staff are now actually paying to work there.

[MissionItsPossible]

4th option: do what gin said, give it to him now and then get a surprise set of nice coffee beans for the actual birthday.

[KurriKurri]

I'd be upset too, obviously your DH will be delighted, but you wanted it to be a birthday surprise and now it won't be. Ignore all the 'if that's all youve got to worry about....' gang - they turn up on every single thread just to spout unpleasantness. In fact I find the more you have to worry about, the more likely you are to get upset over relatively small things, because you are fighting against big stuff and it;s the little things that knock you down. So for you. it is a lovely present and your Dh will get a lot of use and pleasure out of it. Not much you can do now, the damage is done (and I think the one month extra Prime is a bit feeble - they could have done better than that)

I've been in the same boat almost - I ordered a ssewing machine for my DD's birthdya last year, specified plain packaging, gift etc and it arrive in clear 'sewing machine' packaging. But I was lucky enough to get to the door and bundle it upstairs without her seeing, but it is a useless service by Amazon.

[Tinty]

OP Keep it and use it now and if you can stretch to it, buy him some fancy special coffee to use in it for his birthday, and some chocs (for sharing as you don't drink coffee).

[SausagesAndMashed]

It's 'frustration free packaging' supposedly. I kicked up a right fuss about it the other day, as it's a bit silly to do it that close to Christmas, and have it set as standard. They first offered me another one, and when I said I didn't need another one I just wanted my comments taken on board in regard to it they just issued me with a refund.

[OlennasWimple]

I get why you are upset

I'd give it to him now, saying it was meant to be a birthday surprise, but Amazon have ruined that (said with a smile! ) Then get nice coffee, or a mug or something small so he has something to open on the day itself

[coddiwomple]

It's annoying and a very obvious mistake from the shop, so you were absolutely right to complain.

It's not the end of the world though, your DH is an adult, celebrate his birthday today with your gift, it doesn't really matter if he has his gift a month early. You can still have a birthday meal on the day.
It's not big deal if adults have a birthday present early.

[GreatDuckCookery6211]

Why are there twats on many threads these days saying it’s not the end of the world to a poster that is upset by something?

Do you think that it helps?

I’d be annoyed too upset especially given that you specifically told them it was a gift.

[Chrys2017]

I feel for you OP. But there's not much you can really do, other than to take your custom elsewhere in future!

After waiting in three days for a delivery, being constantly lied to by a courier company and now being informed I will have to do the same tomorrow, the allure of online shopping is definitely beginning to wane.

[Chrys2017]

p.s. I would let him have the coffee machine now and get him a smaller 'surprise' for his birthday.

[ArcheryAnnie]

Just give it to him now and enjoy lots of delicious coffee over the festive season. You could buy him a "token" birthday present of some really nice coffee beans for the actual day.

This is a great idea.

[BackforGood]

YABU to be "really upset" over it.
It's annoying, yes, but they've apologised and compensated you.
It really isn't that big a deal.
I'd let him have it now, then then give him some wrapped coffee and have a laugh over it on his actual birthday. But then, I do like to keep things in proportion.

[flowery]

”It..would have been a much appreciated birthday present.”

But presumably it still is? He’s just getting it early. He still appreciates it just as much, surely?

[Thishatisnotmine]

This happened to my dh when he ordered my birthday present from Amazon. He also checked the 'gift so more packaging box'. He was under a lot of syress and suffering depression at the time so was really annoyed about it and sulked for a couple of days. Fun times! But from what I've read Amazon keep doing this so maybe choose somewhere else for surprise presents to be sure they are wrapped.

[Chrys2017]

One thing I will say in Amazon's defence is they usually offer a 'collect' option from a local shop, so if you want something to be a surprise you can choose that option. That doesn't apply to their third-party sellers, though.

[ajandjjmum]

A similar thing happened to me years ago for DH's 30th. I'd arranged a trip to Paris, and the travel agent had written 'Surprise for husband' on the front of the file. Unfortunately the idiot who phoned and told him 'we have your tickets for Paris' had clearly not learned to read!

I cancelled the whole thing - but he took me for my 30th!

[smileygrapefruit]

The ironic thing is that I never tick that box usually and things always come in about a million layers of packaging in a box 10 times bigger than the item. I was so careful this time and this happens!
Think I'm going to have to send it back and get my thinking cap on for another surprise present. I'm sorry if people think I'm being ridiculous but you don't get many nice surprises as an adult!

[bespawler]

I'd save it for the day and buy a small present as a surprise like a mug or fancy coffee. It's crappy service but not much you can do about it

[BonnesVacances]

DH would have seen it and then have forgotten all about it by his birthday!

Put it away and tell your DH he can't have it until his birthday. If he knows it's coming he'll look forward to being able to have a nice coffee on his birthday. The surprise is ruined, but not the present itself.

[RidingWindhorses]

I understand why you're annoyed but generally men care much less about presents and all the shenanigans around them. I'm sure he's delighted to get a coffee maker for Christmas. The fact it's come a month early doesn't spoil the surprise.