To not always enjoy being a parent?

[Babybauble]

It's taken a lot to ask this, so please try not to flame me.

I have three DC, but I find myself feeling guilty a lot for not always enjoying the experience tbh. I have a 6 month old boy and 6 and 9 year old girls, I know I would walk hot coals for any of them and their happiness and safety means everything to me, yet I can't help but sometimes feel too tired or that i want alone time and then I feel really guilty.

I'm not sure if I have an unrealistic ideal in my mind, as to me it's very much a mixed experience. The baby is very demanding bless him, I feel a lot of joy and love/desire to protect etc. But sometimes I just feel soooo guilty for not always living upto being blissfully in love with my child. It's bloody hard work sometimes.

I don't think I'm depressed, I often plan and look forward to a lot. But then it's hard to determine if im normal or not?

AIBU to find three DC hard work and not always feel blissfully loved up towards them? I feel that I love them in the sense I would die in a heartbeat to protect them and I have zero regrets about having them, but I'm finding it hard to shake the mummy guilt and social media doesn't help as it portrays a very different story to my experience.

Totally normal. Being a parent is hard work! 3 kids and a baby in the mix I'm not surprised you are wanting time to yourself. We all feel the guilt, but we have to do it too. Time to ourselves helps us be better parents when we are with them as we are refreshed and have had a break. Have a and a

I think you sound normal.

The amount of times I mouth "GIVE ME FUCKING STRENGTH" behind my 3 year old's back is ridiculous

Totally normal, you've seen too many Instagram mummy bloggers and Hallmark ideas in movies etc.

You sound normal to me. Being a parent is very hard work, no one ever prepares you to these feelings because of social image of being a mum in blissful love. I've never known one real mum who was basking in bliss 24/7.

Completely normal! I’ve gone to bed with a feeling of dread before if I know I’ve got nowhere to go or no one to see the next day!x

Thankyou so much everyone, this has made me quite anxious for a while. I definitely think Foggy has hit the nail on the head with the Insta Mummy's, that's exactly the image I have in my head of how I should be! Always enjoying parenting, always head over heels in love, etc etc.

For me I get a lot of joy from parenting, many moments of deep unconditional love and also moments of exhaustion, no joy and stress too. Sometimes I know I love them but I can feel a bit indifferent in the sense I don't always enjoy thrm. I think I need to re-educate myself as this fantasy is way too hard to live upto.

I'm glad someone else feels the same as me! I only have 2 DC and o find it really hard. My husband works shifts and I get left with them both a lot. 5 month old boy and 3 year old girl.
I love her dearly but sometimes I feel 'WHY did I have another child' it's horrid to feel that way as I do it regret him one bit but I find juggling hard and sometime get the feeling I can't cope. I suffered PND with my first so am very aware.
I think everyone has this feeling but I'm the same in comparing 'mum of the year' to me and makes me feel a failure.

Sorry about spelling and grammar!!! Also sleep deprived!!!

Totally normal. They are hard, hard work! I'd give my life for DD without hesitation, but I've also been known to drop her in nursery early so I can sit quietly with a coffee for ten mins before work.

I feel the same. I have a very demanding 4 year old and an 8 month old baby. It’s exhausting having them both together at the same time on my own. I look forward to the 4 year olds bed time every day which is awful as I love her to pieces but it’s so much easier dealing with the baby when I haven’t got her sister demanding attention too!

I'm with you but I only have one 7yo. She is a total Angel but for some reason plays up with me and her dad.
She's started screaming and crying when she gets told off or if things don't go her way. It's constant whining and screeching just now and i am finding it hard to keep my cool.
We are almost finished renovating and it's been tough for her but she's been harder work than the renovation.
We plan nice things like going out for tea or a day out and it always ends in tears somehow.
Being a parent is just really fucking hard especially when you throw work and chores into the mix.

Having a six month old is hugely demanding and your body is still recovering from the stress of pregnancy and childbirth. What you are feeling is totally normal, particularly with two other kids in the mix.

Hang in there, it will get easier and I'm sure you're a fine mum!

People only really put the good stuff on social media... it's not worth comparing yourself to others.

The baby/young children days are tough.

I was a single mother when my twins were going through the terrible twos (& threes) and I was working full time and having a large extension built & rest of the house renovated.
I cried myself to sleep more times than I care to remember.
I occasionally begged my parents to have the twins on a sat overnight and would sleep for 12-14 hours straight.

I met my now husband and found out what it was like to have a partner who genuinely shares the responsibilities & workload of life together.

Blimey OP you are still in the dark and hard baby years! Life with an under 1 yr old is exhausting...and you have two others!

Why would parentinf always be joyful? Is anything in life unremittingly wonderful?

Im genuinely surprised anyone would expect having 3 kids to be anything other than tiring full on and a big old mix of joyful and awful moments!

Its like all aspects of life - up and down.

Step away from social media... do it for your own sanity

Can't believe you haven't realised that most people feel the same as you! You're totally normal! Parenting is hard - who have you been speaking to and what sort of bullshit having they been telling you to make you feel so inadequate for not enjoying every moment!

You should try and make me time for yourself every day if you can. Do something you enjoy for half an hour or an hour it's not selfish it's what keeps me going tbh. Weather that's a walk, a run, coffee with a friend, craft whatever. You are not just on the planet to answer to your kids. Make yourself have some time for you you will feel so much better for it and do not feel guilty. I am a mum to 4 with a baby same age as yours. Sometimes parenting is relentless and you need sla little break

Did you think that everyone else enjoys sleep deprivation and poonamis?!

I feel like that with 1 sometimes so you are like superwoman to me! Don't feel guilty

OMG my children piss me off...it's ok

Have you read the Hurrah for Gin blog - to balance out all the other stuff you've seen on the internet about perfect parents - i find the blog funny and relate to it a lot
hurrahforgin.com

Yanbu OP. And step away from social media. Surely you are only seeing all the edited down best bits. It's distorting reality!

I only have one and can on honestly say I have had times when I regretted my decision to have a child. I did not enjoy having a baby much at all. Now she is 5, wonderful, and I love her like mad, but even so sometimes it is hard and not fun at all.

There is a myth of perfect parenting that makes you feel guilty for not loving every moment. Children are supposed to be the most wonderful thing in your life and it can be hard when it just doesn't always feel like that is the case.

Mumsnet is probably the only place where I have not had my feelings dismissed or people looking appalled when I say this. That is why I love it even if it can be a bit weird sometimes.

It's relentless. You have got to manage your energy every single day to make sure you can make it through the next!

Give yourself regular breaks. Schedule it in as ruthlessly as you would schedule in a Dr's appt for DC. Think of it as prevention being better than cure!

I commute by car and pre DC I would have found it stressful and annoying to be sat in traffic. Now it's the most peaceful part of my day. Alone, no one touching me, radio on, bliss!