To want a particularly heinous punishment

[Commuterface]

For people who lean with their whole body braced against handrails/poles on the tube, particularly on the Central line where there aren't enough hand rails at the best of times.

I'm 5 foot nothing so can hardly reach the overhead rail and 'bracers' tut and mutter when I try to squeeze my hand between their back and the pole. It's so bloody inconsiderate.

I go with rhyming with anus mostly because of the Bill & Ted line "this is most non-non heinous". Obviously though thats American too.

Well aren't you lovely OP

And those of you who use your knuckles to hurt people, how nasty!

I have back problems and cannot stand on the spot without "bracing" as you put it. But I don't look like I have physical problems so I'm likely to get confrontation

Ok, but I think we can accept that not everyone has back problems.

blackteas, I think the thread is meant to be light-hearted.

Although God knows why people have to spell that out.

I just give them a' 'do you mind' and raised eyebrows whilst I move my hand onto the rail where I want it.

Also 4'11 & I'll shove my hand in too. I don't want to hurt anyone but I'm not going to risk falling over.

If you have back problems & don't want to ask for a seat, but you're prepared for the confrontation that could come from taking up the pole, isn't the answer to try to get a place by the wall?

There is a special corner of hell reserved for casual pole leaners in my mind

blackteasplease I suggest you get yourself to one of the incredibly helpful LU ticket offices and ask for a "Please offer me a seat" badge - you don't even need to be pregnant to ask for someone to offer you a seat. It will sort out your uncomfortable commute and also let people hold on to the pole. Win Win!

YANBU although there is a certain frisson of excitement in tube surfing (trying to stay upright without holding onto any surface). Less so when hands free means going crashing into the person next to you when the train comes to an abrupt stop...

All these people saying that they have back problems and therefore will damn well use the pole to lean on. Assume your hands still work and you could hold onto the pole with that instead?

I have hypermobility (possible EDS) and standing on a moving tube train is seriously painful on my ankles, knees and hips. If I can't get a seat then I brace against the pole as I'm also too short to reach the overhead holding rails. Leaning against the doors makes the train stall.

I could get one of those "please offer me a seat" badges but I'd feel like a fraud as I have no problem walking, just standing on something that's moving.

Laura
Problems like yours are exactly what the badges are for though
You don't need to feel like a fraud if you have one and use one, any more than I didn't feel like a fraud for using one in early pregnancy on the days when I didn't feel like death

I have HMS and my issues aren't that severe, but if I had problems then that's exactly what the purpose of those badges is for

It's a lot easier to accommodate invisible disabilities or health issues if there's a way to know that the person in question would benefit from a seat

There is space above or below the person’s back for you to hold on to. If you are intent on holding on at your shoulder height then yes, you’ll have a problem. If you do what everyone else does, and hold on where there is a space, then you will have no problems.

I told some guy to move up a bit the other day as I was standing near the door near the train, and he came up and leaned on me, squishing me into the door, presumably as he wanted to lean on the train partition wall rather than standing and holding onto the pole. The train was quite full, but there was no need to actually be that close!

There is space above or below the person’s back for you to hold on to

The space below someone's back is by the arse
If I've got a leaner to deal with, like HELL am I putting my hand near their arse

You’ll put your hand on a pole that is never cleaned, but only on the proviso it’s not near a bum separated from your hand by 2-3 layers of clothing?

I suspect the problem is yours.

It's nothing to do with the cleanliness of the poles though. Why should someone have to grab at arse level or really high up because some selfish arse makes it necessary.

I don't believe for one second the majority of pole hoggers are doing it for medical reasons. I'd be willing to bet most are doing it so that they can play on their phones/read the metro with two hands.

I just grab the pole where I want, and will poke my knuckles out and if they try to slam their back like one idiot tried today, I will shove my bag behind them and give them a world of pain.

That’s a maximum of 40cm of pole in use
Yeah exactly the part of the pole that has the right height to be held comfortably. How generous of them to leave the lower and upper parts

I don’t mess around with knuckles. I made my fingers into little spikes. Leaners shift almost immediately.

Tube jewellery.

claudia
It isn't a cleanliness thing.**

It's a if-they-lean-Back-I'm-sexually-assaulting-them thing!

I don't want my hand trapped between a pole and someone's arse crack, thanks

I have a bad back, I try to either sit or lean against a partition wall but if there is no other choice I hold on to the pole. Leaning against the pole is basically preventing 5-6 people to hold the pole, how would you feel if someone did spread over 5-6 seats because they say they are not comfortable otherwise ( but still not uncomfortable enough to justify asking for a tfl badge...) ?

I'm with you berliozwooler I hate the ones who enter a carriage and just stop, preventing anybody else to get on, because they want the spot next to the door.
I usually ask them to move / push my way in (if there is definitely space in front of them) and then use my handbag as a wall between me and then to prevent them to lean against me. Funnily enough they always end up having enough space to take a step forward at the end...