... to ask you for your non-cliche presents for the (very) elderly

[rightsaidfrederickII]

Let's be honest. They've had a lot of Christmases and they've been considered old for about the last 15/20 of them, and all the classic old person presents have been done to death so many times they never want to see a set of smellies or pot plant again.

The following are officially off the list:
Calendars
Nice toiletries
Flowers
Chocolates / other sweet things
Long books (the concentration isn't there anyway)
Tech which contains more than 3 buttons (more trouble than it's worth to teach them how to use it and have them forget by Boxing Day, and again the day after that)
Shite made by the kids
Pot plants
Alcohol (half a glass and someone will fall over and break their hip)
Jigsaws and other puzzles
Hat / glove / scarf sets

What has everyone else come up with? Previous successes of mine for someone nearer 100 than 90 but still independent include

• 'One cup' kettle that dispenses a cup of hot water at time and means she doesn't have to lift the kettle any more www.argos.co.uk/product/1219292 (11 months on and she's still saying how good it is!!)
• Coffee table books of her favourite animal species and - for the people watcher in her - Humans of New York Stories www.amazon.co.uk/Humans-New-York-Brandon-Stanton/dp/1447295552?tag=mumsnetforum-21
• A 'meet the animals' experience at the local zoo where she got to go into the enclosure and feed them (wheelchair friendly, hurrah!)

Anyone else had any inspired ideas?

My DPs are 87 and 93, both very active and travel a fair bit but don't want "things" as they say it just adds to the clutter. I always go for edible gifts: both like chocolate, sweets, Stilton/port etc or experiences: voucher for lunch or afternoon tea, or tickets to see a local opera/ballet.

This is making me sad I don’t have an older person in my life to buy for Lost my last grandparent (who was well and independent, died very suddenly) last year. She loved theatre tickets; we took her to see The Nutcracker ballet as she had never been to a ballet before (and neither had we). Had a lovely time. Another gift I did for her was a cross stitched picture; she loved it and showed it off to all her friends!!

Books on local history, with plenty of old photos.

Phonebooks of family, grandchildren.

How about DVDs of classic books - may not be able to read Emma any more, but would be able to cope with the DVD?

Posh Aromatherapy products. Nice sensory experience.

One thing that went down very well with an elderly and not very well was a warm fleece blanket from Edinburgh Woollen Mills. Tartan outside, thick cuddly fleece inside. Not just for oldies, though - I had previously bought them for a dd and her future Dh! That was several ago, and they still use them a lot in winter - less heating needed if you've got one of these to snuggle under on the sofa.

Cashmere bedsocks, a book of maps of the world and a weather station.

How about a joint National Trust membership if they like that sort of thing.

Alternatively buy them a weekend stay in a nice hotel or an experience they can enjoy like a picnic on the London eye or something?

Coming on to say thank you for this thread. Off the back of it I've just ordered my 95 year old Cockney gran a book of photos of London in the 1920s, and I think she'll love it.

A few years ago I went round the family getting everyone to email me photos, printed the lot out & put them in an album for her. There are several spare pages at the back so every so often family members pop new photos in.

After many years I just do the chocolates and biscuits, nearly everything else has gone largely untouched and/or handed back to us. She doesn't really get out, and doesn't want to go to cafe's or anything (worries about toilet access)

Any inspiration appreciated, especially as I have a 'Christmas' birthday present to get as well.

YES to a Google home or an Alexa, wifi permitting. You'd need to have smart plugs and lightbulbs to get it to switch things on and off though, so they're pricey.

So what about remote control plugs, if she doesn't already have them? So so useful, for the mobility impaired, and also the lazy (ie moi). And easy to use.

Weather station? A thing that goes out susie, and a receiver goes inside also. My dad used to love his.

If she liked the zoo thing, are there other animal experiences nearby? Other animals to meet at the zoo?
Any little sanctuaries where she could pet llamas or something like that?

I take one of our elderly relatives our for lunch or for a day out at a national trust property and then get them a token gift to open on Christmas day.

They love the change of scenery and the company.

Mini wensleydale cheeses, small artisan crackers and small jars of local chutney which won't go off.

A really lovely heated electric throw (I have one myself too, not just for old people, they’re good for everyone who feels the cold)

An iPad (easy to use once set up)

Books full of glorious photographs (for a relative who loved to travel but no longer could)

Photos; in frames or a photobook.

My grandmother and I were very close until she died aged 105, and she never had a problem telling me what she wanted. As she got older her hair got thinner and her scalp more delicate and one of her favourite presents from me was a pure bristle Mason and Pearson baby hairbrush..... Just a thought!

My grandma refuses to age . She loves horror films- the gorier the better! Same with books. She loves a bit of bling and is better with technology than I am! She's 90. She's awesome and fierce! She loves shopping (I hate it- but my aunt takes her to market towns and shopping centres). She loves a drink. She hates experiences and eating out. Love the chocolate subscription idea, thanks! I'll get her one (hopefully cheaper than HC!) To go with a sparkly brooch.

Presents which went down well with my Gran:

• Sky Sports subscription
• new duvet cover
• cinema tickets and a homemade voucher for a taxi there & back which I'd already paid for
• after the success of the cinema and discovering the firm had a really nice, patient driver, we gave some homemade vouchers for outings where she had a couple of hours and the driver would take her where she liked. She liked the freedom of being in charge rather than feeling as though she was relying on a favour.

That's a whole heap of exclamation marks.

@MrGrumpy01

We've been known to make scouting trips to cafes etc. before taking her out to check access (I've also been known to leave 1* trip advisor reviews for cafes discovered to be thoroughly inaccessible e.g. only high tables). DisabledGo is also a good way to check out the facilities in advance (and at least cross some off the scouting list) www.disabledgo.com/ Naturally we have a repertoire of known good'uns too.

Could you vary the usual with cheese and crackers, for instance, or perhaps some sort of chocolate subscription?

Magazine subscription perhaps? She can't stop that coming through her door every month

What’s your budget?

Cosy feet are the way forward for the elderly. I buy my gran a pair every year for Christmas along with some chocolates.

Newspaper from day they were born.

I have the same problem too with MIL though she never goes out so vouchers for cafes or afternoon tea would be a waste. I’ve taken to just doing the hamper thing with a basket. She loves Thornton’s gingers and Sainsbury’s butter mintos so i get those and add in a few other nice bits and pieces.

Great ideas on here. I was planning to get my Gran one of those room diffuser things from the white company... But I really like the window bird feeder as well...

Gifts that went well:
Subscription to yours magazine
Gorgeous, soft, fleecy throw

Not so well: another photo frame, lavender microwavable footmuff!

This year I've bought a wool pillow, silk pillowcase and pillow spray. We'll see how it goes!:)

My 91 MIL is desperate to do a wing walk! Not even sure if you can ‘buy’ those but even so I don’t think we’d dare!