To really not want to do Christmas, at all?

[willowriverwander]

I know I sound like Scrooge here, but hear me out.

I just don't like it. I am vegetarian and I feel a bit ill at the thought of the turkeys being killed. I hate the "stuff your face" sort of mentality that's seen as acceptable. I mean, in Dickensian England, fair enough. People had nothing for the other 364 days. But today we are so greedy anyway. I actually find the food thing really stressful.

I like buying things for my children but again, I am so uncomfortable with this idea of them tearing through hundreds of pounds worth of gifts. I hate the way everywhere is crammed at this time of year.

Tentatively, I'm wondering about just having a tree, and then just a chilled out day with a nice dinner. Maybe one gift each.

We are going skiing in the New Year so that should be nice. I wish it was over Christmas itself!

Or will I be considered shocking by today's standards?

It’s definitely spread. Xmas eve boxes, Xmas bedding, trees up in November, elves on shelves, adult advent calendars containing cosmetics/booze (saw a £1000 one ), window painting, custom made cupcakes, Black Friday, online santa tracking, trips to Lapland........

It’s definitely spread. Xmas eve boxes, Xmas bedding, trees up in November, elves on shelves, adult advent calendars containing cosmetics/booze (saw a £1000 one shock), window painting, custom made cupcakes, Black Friday, online santa tracking, trips to Lapland........

But that’s generally what happens throughout generations. Our grandparents probably got a satsuma and a penny whistle. Our parents got a couple of wooden toys and a stocking. We got a stocking and a pile of toys under the tree...
Things evolve. The beauty is that you can choose how you want to celebrate. It’s entirely up to you. So moaning about how other people and what other people spend is completely pointless.

Things evolve

But don’t necessarily improve. This abject consumerism is negatively impacting us as a society, as a species and the planet.

Bigger isn’t necessarily better.

I couldn't give a flying figgy pudding what other people do at Christmas or what they think of our Christmas. Honestly, who cares? Do whatever makes you and your family happy and forget about anyone else.

My memory goes back a lot further than 50 yrs, but in the 70's, when my dcs were young, we did not have half the Xmas products and pre-Xmas build-up they have today. See Titty's post. Advent calendars for adults are this year's hype. Jo Malone for £60! The Hoo-ha about Floella's £50 for stickers and a pencil sharpener. We only had one for the whole household, with pictures not chocolate.

I don't see many 'themed' Xmas trees decorated with hand glued paper chains today. We didn't put it up till the last day of term. Dcs made their own Xmas cards and calendars for relatives. Xmas Eve was making mince pies, The Night Before Xmas and a teaspoon of Phenergan - 'Father Christmas medicine'.

And we weren't some weird family like the Walton's. Pretty normal for a London suburb.

I think it depends.

I don't know anyone that has been to Lapland, has Christmas Eve boxes, Christmas bedding or adult expensive advent calendars.

A couple do Elf on the Shelf but very much in the manority. in fact one that did it last year isn't this as it was such a pain to do

and the relentless pressure to "create magical memories" for the kids can get to fuck too.

Do whatever makes you and your family happy and forget about anyone else.

Ah. True Xmas spirit there. Makes me all warm and fuzzy. I’m off to chuck another orangutan on the log burner.

I'm not doing Christmas this year either. I've volunteered to work Christmas morning, I'm sending DH and the kids to the inlaws for dinner, and when I get home I will have some snacks, a glass of wine and some nice music on, and enjoy the peace and quiet.

Bigger isn’t necessarily better

Of course not. But you can choose not to be part of the abject consumerism. That was my point, and that’s the decision we make as a family. My children’s Christmas is very similar to how mine was, 30 years ago.

Love your username, poisoning. Going to be singing that all afternoon!

I don't think it's anything to do with tides turning at all, it's just people now openly say we dont do it that way.

Yes, true! Although, I do think that’s because some people are now so turned off by the crazy consumerism (like Christmas themed everything - who buys some of this stuff)? People are more likely to tone things down in rebellion, which I think is good.

I have noticed where my in-laws live though, that more people seem to put up ridiculous Christmas lights, which I do find a bit wasteful if I’m totally honest. Bah humbug !

Christmas frugality, a pared down day, save the planet kind of thing will become the fashion of tomorrow. Wait for it.

It's nearing peak Christmas at the moment, so the only way is down. But it will be soooo fashionable to say, Hmm no we don't do anything special, just a few candles and a mince pie. Being together is the main thing for us really etc. etc. etc.

Watch this space!

In the meantime, enjoy all your Christmases whatever way you wish, that makes you happy..

^^ I just worry that there would be competitive frugality though, like “oh we only give each other one gift and an open-house dinner” “well WE don’t give any gifts to each other and we volunteer at a homeless shelter” “pfft! ONE homeless shelter? We work at one every day in December and rear the turkey and grow the veg all ourselves” kind of thing. Making this up obviously, but we all know what (some) social media users/bloggers can be like.

I find it bloody hard work from the beginning of December until the end, the rushing around, the expense, the cooking and cleaning. Whats to love about it?

toffee why do you worry though?

December is a month in its own right.....December is not 'xmas'

thats annoying. and everyone saying its dark, cold and miserable....not really.

'FFS don't be miserable' - this.

Nobody is forcing you to do anything you feel uncomfortable with. Spend what you want, eat what you want. But every year I get hacked off with the miserable scrooges who use gluttony and capitalism as an excuse to be gloomy.

If you have kids, enjoy them. If you have your health and family who love you, be thankful.

I had shit Christmases as a kid. Abusive and angry. And a father who would huff at anyone daring to look at a chocolate because he hated the Christmas gluttony.

There are things I don't like for sure. It is commercialised and the pressure for umpteen traditions and shows etc is silly. I get that some people don't like excess food.

But for heaven's sake it's not about you especially if you have kids.

Twinkly lights, nice music, Santa. Read the simple Christmas memories thread. People remember their mums just trying to make it special. The smells, small but significant rituals. They are happy memories for many.

I refuse to let my miserable childhood get in the way. I don't spend masses. We don't do a huge amount. I don't eat what I don't want to. But the kids' excitement and joy when the lights go on the big outdoor tree on the school run make me happy every year.

miserable scrooges? what do you mean by that?

People who cannot appreciate the good and nice things about Christmas or have to ruin it for others with their own miserable attitude.

The poster who is not doing Christmas and sending her family to the in laws

Yes it's a bit more preparation and cooking but bloody hell, most women these days are hardly enduring the slog that our ancestors did. Just tone it down. Do a normal roast. Online shopping. Go out for dinner.

But the miserable attitude of some is extreme.

My father was like this and it did ruin Christmas, yes I did resent it. We are estranged now but for other reasons. However this symbolised his narcissism. He hated Christmas so everybody else had to. All the moaning about consumerism was an excuse. He never did a charitable thing in his damn life.

Yes it's a bit more preparation and cooking but bloody hell, most women these days are hardly enduring the slog that our ancestors did. Just tone it down. Do a normal roast. Online shopping. Go out for dinner.

#everydaysexism

DH cooks Christmas dinner in our house.

Actually Tittygolightly my dh is the cook in this household.

Why refer to women then?