Is my partner lying about money to me?

[xAnnax]

A month ago I started working for home selling cosmetics for a well known brand. We set it up in my partners name but only because I am a bit deaf so didn't want to face talking to a sales leader and not being able to understand them. It was just easier for him to deal with them.

Anyway, we both deliver the catalogs and he will deliver the orders. Whereas I run our facebook page driving to drive our online sales and I will put the orders through on the computer, fill out forms and bag up the orders ready for him to take out. So, we consider it to be both of our business. Even though it was my idea initially.

The first campaign went really well, collected brochures and then when the delivery came we went around to our customers and delivered it. My partner then took the money the post office to pay for it.

The second campaign went really well, got even more orders and delivered all the items. Anyway, this time my partner took the money to the post office and was informed by the lady there that there systems were down or there was some sort of problem with the machine and it couldn't be paid. Apparently the woman in the Post office put the money in a safe and said for him to come back and they could try again. He knows her personally so he agreed to this. He rang me up and told me at the time.

I was annoyed as I said to him he should have just gone to the bank. It actually isn't our money and I didn't feel ok with it just sitting in a safe even if it was with someone he knew well. I just wanted it paid so that I didn't have to worry about the bill.

He left it about 3 days till he went back to get the money from the post office and this woman (he though i reminded him a few times)

He decided to pay at a different Post office, for whatever reason. And the money went through to his bank account - or so he thought.
I asked to see if it had gone through ok, as was a little bit suspicious about the whole post office story and surprise surprise it wasn't in his account.

He said this would be because the servers may be down at the bank, which happens on a sunday as it has happened before apparently.

After several calls to the bank who said they could see the money on their system but it hadn't gone through, my partner was told to wait a day to see if it went through then.

When it didn't (after me mythering him to check his account) he went down in person to the bank and they said they didn't know where the money was but they could see he'd put it in. They said they'd ring him back after doing some checks into where it had gone. Apparently, it had happened to some other customers too.

I just don't know what to think about this. It just seems to be one thing after another.

My partner hasn't been the best with money, he can be careless with it at times. But I can usually see where it has gone when we work it out . I've suspected he has lied before about money but only the odd £30. This has only happened a few times so I let it pass. However, This is almost £90 and isn't actually our money. I don't want this ruining what i consider my little part time job. As it may do if we don't "find" the money as obviously I can't order my customers next order till I've paid.

I'm not sure if this is the banks fault and they made an error or if he's used it for something else although not sure what. I've not noticed anything out of the ordinary.

Is he lying to me?

[Candlelight234]

Insist on accompanying him to the bank and see for yourself whatvthey say about it. Sounds like a loads of BS to me though.

[HeebieJeebies456]

We set it up in my partners name but only because I am a bit deaf so didn't want to face talking to a sales leader and not being able to understand them

If it's in his name then it's his money and you don't have any claims over the 'part time earnings'......you do realise that don't you?
If he doesn't want to pay the suppliers there's nothing you can do about it.

Get rid of him and set up the business again but in your own name.
What options have you used in the past when you found it difficult to communicate/listen to others due to your deafness?
You can always use email/text as a way around the face to face/phone conversations.
Or ask the other person to speak up/more slowly etc.

I did witness him making the phone call to the bank.
Unless you also heard the conversation from the other end he could have quite easily faked the whole thing.....he could have been speaking to the Talking Clock for all you know.

His threats just mean we can't talk about anything that he deems negative.
Why would you give a nobhead like this the power and control over what was meant to be your business?
Why are you even with him when he has form for lying etc?

[gamerchick]

hey all say 'Just wait until you see I was telling the truth all along'. It's classic liar behaviour to feign indignation when challenged about a CLEAR lie.

So is ‘come with me and check’ and ‘ring them and ask if you don’t believe ne’ Knowing you won’t.

Go with him tomorrow and ask in front of him. I’ll bet he’ll kick up a stink and throw a wobbly to make you back down.

I would kiss goodbye to that money or put it back in your self. He’ll be banking on you sorting it out and letting it go like you always have.

[EmilyChambers79]

The Post office wouldn't offer to put the money in the safe, especially one within a newsagent. They wouldn't be covered for a start if they were held up or the money went missing.

It sounds a bit questionable what he's up to. What would he normally do with the money he has lied about in the past?

[Bluntness100]

Is there a bookies near the post office op?

The whole the Post office systems were down, so they kept it in the safe, so then he left it three days, so then he got it from that post office but went to another post office, (I assume because it’s one he thought you’d be less likely to know the staff and be able to check) where he paid it in, but the banks servers were now also down so couldn’t see it, then apparantly they could see it but didn’t know where it had gone ( which is in itself crazy, if they can see it was paid in they know where it is, it’s a cash transaction) and now there is some investigation and they will call him back and he’s lost the receipt but they can check cc tv, Is the craziest bullshit story I’ve ever heard. Why would you check cctv if they can see it has been paid in to his account?

He could well have phoned the bank and they said they couldn’t see it in his account and would investigate and call him back. What they won’t have said is they can see he paid it in, they will have no idea what he’s talking about.

It’s just the worse set of lies ever.

[RoseGoldEagle]

Sorry OP. People tell the most far-fetched lies when they're hiding something and can seem so convincing when you're in the middle of it. He'll stick to his story up until the point you can prove it, and even then will probably be annoyed and defensive and full of excuses. Tell him you know he spent that money, and you need him to start telling you the truth right now for you to stand any chance of getting past this. But I'd seriously consider leaving, for all the other reasons you've said as well. You'll look back in a year and be so glad you didn't carry on putting up with this.

[Justbookedasummmerholiday]

Please report him. He is a thief. And a liar. And I hope an ex.

[ifnotnowtenwhen]

I’m sure he’s lying but how about this...

You go with him. Don’t be disarmed by your hearing impairment. Get answers to your questions.

If he’s telling the truth he’ll support you, and consider making complaints to bank etc with times, dates and see how far he gets with it.

After all if he’s telling the truth he’ll support you in the quest for justice.

Good luck op.

[Firstworlddramas]

What happened in the end?

[Lucyccfc]

Agree with everyone else - he is lying.

£500 that I had in my house to pay a tradesman went missing and my DH said he had taken it to work to put it in the safe. Usual lies - it went straight to the bookies. That was the final straw for me (after years of lies). He got given 30 minutes to pack his bags. He claims it was all about his depression. It's bollocks, he's just a liar and won't change.

[Biker47]

Money is long gone.

Why would anyone offer to put £90 in a post office safe rather than just handing them it back and say come back later, it's not an exceptionally large ammount of money to warrant putting it in a safe.