Would you be annoyed if a class mate told your 7 year old that Father Christmas didn't exist?

[nickEcave]

My daughter is 7 1/2 (Year 3). She is right on the cusp of not believing in Father Christmas any longer. Her older sister (10) knows that we fill up the stockings and I have no problem with my younger DD no longer believing. My problem is that if we confirm that Father Christmas isn't real then she will immediately tell her class-mates. (She will do this even if we ask her not to as she is extremely impulsive) We moved to a new school relatively recently which is much more MC than her last school and lots of her friends parents are a bit PFB about their kids. Most of her friendship group don't have older siblings so she is already perceived as a bit more "sophisticated" (in a bad way!) by the parents. In my shoes would you keep "Father Christmas" going another year for the sake of giving her class-mates another year of innocent wonder?

[Rebeccaslicker]

To the PP who said that even as a child she queried one man delivering all those presents - my DB who is a physicist loved this when it came out. The stats that would be necessary to achieve it - and the inevitable smooshing of santa into "pink goo" by the high speed!

www.chemteam.info/Humor/Santa.html

[Natsku]

DD wondered about the one man getting around so fast but quickly concluded that every country has their own Father Christmas

[Hillarious]

Rebeccaslicker - that's great. Not only did I wonder about the feasibility of getting round every household, but I also wondered how come there could be Father Christmas in Debenhams, Father Christmas in Atkinson's, Father Christmas in Paulden's, Father Christmas in Woolworth's etc, all at the same time.

[Natsku]

DD literally just asked me half an hour ago whether father Christmas is real or just a man dressed up!

[Mamabear4180]

I have always personally thought the downside of home ed would be the lack of input from lots of different sources. The most well rounded kids I know are the ones who have been exposed to a wide range of people of different beliefs and backgrounds. We shouldn't be attempting to raise our kids in some kind of vacuum where only our beliefs and opinions are heard imo.


It depends how you home ed. My DC are below school age at the moment and constantly mixing with other children and having lots of varied experiences. I don't want that to change, I just don't like the school environment. Other people's beliefs and opinions don't have to include cold harsh reality at the age of 7. That's my point and if I create a vacuum which gives my DC a great childhood then good! A child's imagination (including things like santa) is very important to being a well rounded adult imo.

[BoardGameBlues]

I never understand parents who keep it going"as long as possible" by actively lying to children who are talking realising the truth behind an obvious lie. If they're looking for permission to believe then fair enough. But "if you don't believe then Santa won't come," seems like it could be quite distressing to a child who couldn't help feeling skeptical.

Likewise being annoyed at another child for wanting to talk to their friends about a new thing they've realised, rather than helping maintain a lie seems unreasonable. Actively lying to your friends could again be distressing for kids.

What I'm saying is, this should be about the kids in question, not a parent's predetermined idea of what constitutes "wonder". As long as possible too often message longer than is actually realistic.

[Humpsfor20yards]

Other people's beliefs and opinions don't have to include cold harsh reality at the age of 7

I'm not sure what this means but if you think not believing in Father Christmas is some kind of 'cold harsh reality', i find it funny.

[GeekyBlinders]

My brother worked it out when he was seven and asked my parents, who admitted it was them. Despite being sworn to secrecy by my mum, he immediately told four-year-old me, which means I don't really have any memory of believing in Father Christmas. TBH, I wish my parents had lied to him for a couple more years so I could have had those fun memories and traditions.

If you know your daughter is impulsive enough to tell her friends despite you warning her not to, I'd try to keep it up for another year if at all possible.

[dadap]

Ds goes to school with a large proportion of Muslim children. After Xmas holidays At age 5 - a boy told him there was no such thing and it's his parents. I felt gutted but I then told him the truth.
However -
Before that Xmas he asked father Xmas for an iPad - I couldn't afford it so bought him a kindle.
After the above conversation when I told him there was no father Xmas - it's me - he then said to me - "if you are father Xmas why did you buy a kindle when I wrote for an iPad?".

[FlouncyDoves]

For everyone saying to leave it for this year - when else is a 7yr old going to start questioning FC? In July, while they’re on the beach?!

I don’t think you should care OP, it’s not your responsibility to ensure other people’s children believe in FC. It’s all part of growing up.

[FlouncyDoves]

Oh, and if the parents raise it with you within earshot of their children announce ‘at least she didn’t tell them the Easter Bunny and Tooth Fairy aren’t real too’. Lol

[QueenAravisOfArchenland]

I never really "believed" that I can remember - the whole thing just struck me as too improbable and my older siblings clearly didn't buy into it - and it never stopped me loving Christmas.

I think adults getting angry at children for talking about their experiences and beliefs is really pretty disturbing, and shows that the whole charade is not nearly as "for the kids" as they tell themselves.

[PussCatTheGoldfish]

I think my 8yo still believes. My 6yo is much more savvy and has asked if I'm Santa already (I dodged it with 'ask me no questions and I'll tell you no lies') .

No I wouldn't be pissed off if another child told them.

[Chocolatecake12]

Personally I think 7 is a little young and they’re only children for such a short while it’s a shame that the magic of Father Christmas isn’t believed.
However parents feel about it it’s very difficult to control what your child tells other children at school.
Has your child actually asked outright or are they on the cusp of not believing? I’d be a bit vague if you can at its so close to Christmas. Next year they’ll be 8 and I’m sure your child won’t be the only one by then.

[wednesdayswench]

That's how most children discover Santa isn't real, from their peers.

7 is quite young though, it's a bit of a shame. Would've been nice to keep the magic alive a little longer.

As long as they don't get sent off to high school still believing in Santa, Easter bunny, tooth fairy etc.

[ThumbWitchesAbroad]

Today I picked DS2 (5) up from preschool and they had been colouring in Christmas pictures. One had a pic of a very fat Santa stuck in the chimney - he showed it to me proudly and said "That's my Dad!"
Ds2 didn't hear. But if he had, he wouldn't have thought anything of it apart from "Wow! that kid's dad is Santa!!"

[LordSugarWillSeeYouNow]

My dd is 6 almost 7 and in year 2.

She has recently been doubting the existence of Santa and I am a bit gutted to be honest.
I have an older dc, ds is 14 and he believed until around 9 iirc.

I just remember what happened to me as a child and it was awful.
My neighbour was 4 years older than me
And we were great friends, still are today.
I was 4 and she was 8, I was the eldest of 2 and she was the youngest of 7 and she told me that Santa didn't exist.

My parents tried to convince me otherwise but I wasn't soft and from that point i knew. It sort of took away a lot of the magic of Christmas blah blah.

If my dd knew the truth now then no way would she be able to keep it to herself!

[BoardGameBlues]

I think adults getting angry at children for talking about their experiences and beliefs is really pretty disturbing, and shows that the whole charade is not nearly as "for the kids" as they tell themselves.

Exactly.

[Shen0102]

I don't know any 7.5years olds who still believe in Santa..

[Humpsfor20yards]

I think adults getting angry at children for talking about their experiences and beliefs is really pretty disturbing, and shows that the whole charade is not nearly as "for the kids" as they tell themselves.

Its mental.

A child's imagination (including things like santa) is very important to being a well rounded adult imo. As for this implication that a kid who doesn't believe in Santa has less imagination and is less likely to be a well-rounded adult, its totally ludicrous.

[NataliaOsipova]

I'm struggling to understand adults getting angry or pissed off about 7 year olds talking about something that is true. Its supposed to be a harmless tradition, a bit of fun!

Completely agree.

[TheNaze73]

What do you mean he doesn’t exist?

[Morphene]

wtaf is wrong with people?

Imagination is not the same as believing something totally implausible (possibly deliberately in order to acquire material goods).

My DD is a proper rationalist and dismissed santa as BS when she was 3. This doesn't stop her pretending that magic is real and telling me in great deal all the new magical skills she has gained recently or which of her friends will be the next one to be able to fly.

Training young people to accept total bullshit impossible ideas for fun is a really stupid thing to do.

Training young people to believe that as long as they behave well the world will provide them with free presents is doubly so.

[TheletterZ]

Some on here would hate my DD, she never believed, no idea why, she just didn't. Christmas when she was 3 she told me (being very serious and letting me down gently) that FC was just a fun game parents played with their kids and it was just a man in dress up. I just stood there and did a fish face. We did discuss not telling others but I don't think that lasted very long. She still loves the whole christmas lark - food out for rudolf, stockings, writing the letter etc... just she knew it was a game.

I don't like 'if you don't believe you don't receive' - if seems to be to be saying if you tell the truth you will be punished. (And I really hate the good/bad list thing, some kids don't get gifts at christmas, for lots of reasons, and all the messages are saying that is because they are on the naughty list.)

[nickEcave]

A bit of a mixture of responses here but I'm now feeling a bit more confident about not worrying too much what other people choose to tell their school-aged children . I did have a friend who brought her children up believing in the Easter Bunny (they weren't British). As it's not a "thing" in this country I hadn't realised they believed in it in the same way as Father Christmas and told them that my kids got their easter eggs from Mummy and Daddy.