Impossible to go back to work?

[Ivybows]

I have 2 preschool dc, I'm a sahm through circumstance more than choice although I have enjoyed it and I'm greatful that I've had this time at home with the dc.

I had planned to look for work once dc start school, this is now just a few months away- will probably be part time for 6/12 months.

So my issue is if I return to my previous field of work I'd work roughly 8.30-3.30 meaning I wouldn't be able to do the school run, I'd have to find and pay for wrap around care which is pretty thin on the ground in my area and would cost a minimum of £70 a day for the 2 of them. My job role isn't a highly paid one.

I'd hate to never be able to drop them off or pick them up but I'm not sure if this is just the norm?

So how does everyone else manage the school run?

I had planned to look for work once dc start school, this is now just a few months away

How old are your children? Are you confusing school with a nursery class at a school?

I solved this problem by registering as a childminder myself.

My 20 year old told me the other day that she always liked me being a childminder because it was like having friends round to play every day after school.

@banana I'm not in England so no 30 free hours at at the moment. Just a minimum of 10 hours statuary provision which is usually a part time nursery class within a school.

@headdreamer I'm not office based so can't be flexible on my start time, part time for me would be 30 hours but the times are fixed so I wouldn't be able to do the school run.

@grandma not confusing it no, all 3 year olds go to a nursery class within a school at 3 here so that's what we class as starting school.

Even entry level jobs in retail etc seem impossible because they need you to be flexible.

Ah so your part time isn’t 3 days a week? That’s more normal and means you will be there for 2 days.

I can see it’s a problem as you are retail. Office based will be easier if you have some admin skills?

I think there are likely to be other childcare options out there that you just don't know about.

If you're talking preschooler then the norm is to use a nursery which IS preschool for the older ones. There are no preschools attached to schools round here, all children go to some sort of private or community run preschool/nursery with their funded hours, with or without top ups. So the funded hours would be taken off your £70 a day total, which would help somewhat but it's still going to be expensive with 2 preschoolers.

Realistically though, you won't want to move them now so prob best to wait until at least one's in school. Are they twins?

Hi op- our primary school where dd goes has always had a breakfast club but no after school club until last year as the demand was there and it is working brilliant.

Ours started with one parent asking and then the school sending out a letter to see if there was any interest- worth a try?

Sorry my last post was confusing I'm not office or retail I meant that I'd looked into retail but couldn't do that either because they require flexibility.

I used to do 45 hours a week pre dc so 30 is considered part time, there are occasionally 16 hour posts but they are like gold dust.

Maybe a career change is the answer

Sorry crossposted. OP I think people could be more helpful if you'd mentioned whereabouts you are, as it has a big impact on whether people's experience is relevant or helpful. Mine clearly wasn't!

I'd hate to never be able to drop them off or pick them up but I'm not sure if this is just the norm?

I'm in the US, and it is (I'd say) the norm for working parents to put their kids on the bus to school before going to work, but not be able to pick them up after school. They use a variety of childcare solutions. I hired an after-school nanny as I had three children and they had after-school activities that she was able to drive them to.

That isn't the hardest thing though - covering the 11-week summer holidays are the hardest thing IME.

I forget that it's a different system in England to Wales, that's where I am.

So my original options were nursery 2 full day places circa £80 a day, the 2 local to me aren't education providers so we wouldn't be able to use the 10 free hours. Childminders very thin on the ground and with long waiting lists and nannys are non existent. This was my reason for becoming a sahm.

I just didn't realise how difficult it would be to work even when they start school if one or both parents aren't in a 9-5 job or you don't have grandparents on hand.

You could phone around to see if any CMs would be willing to add your children & your school to their pickup routine. They can only say no.

Flexitime is how people manage, too. If you could change those 21 hours/week into 5 days over a fortnight, for instance it would reduce your costs.

Actually 9-5 can be difficult too if you have a long commute. Generally we rely on being able to flex our hours a bit and there are a lot of grandparents on the school run. A hodge podge of different solutions for different days is absolutely the norm. But we could see that people in our town did manage to do it, as 2 working parent families or single working parents, so we knew it must be possible, and we just kind of cobbled it together like everyone else. If you look around you and find no other families have 2 working parents, then you're in a different situation.

The only people I knew who had children in "preschool" hours, such as 9-12am, either worked evening or night shifts or had grandparents or childminders doing wraparound. It must be very difficult if that's your only option.

I do flexible hours so they are happy for me to start later so I can do the school run. Mr Foo does the same, he starts early and finishes in time to pick her up. Don’t assume you have to start at 8.30. Many employers will allow flexible working. You can also apply for childcare vouchers to offset some tax. Not massive, but every little helps.

Sorry I didn't mean it's easy for 9-5 working parents just that if dh had a 9-5 job I could take part time evening/weekend work.

Most of my friends are 2 parent working families but in most cases 1 full time/1 part time or have family to help out.

I just feel a bit sad that going back to work means I won't get to take them to their first day of school and probably won't get the time off for assemblies and sports days.

Seems like lots of parents must be in a similar situation. The pay off for me would be that I'd find it easy to take leave during the 6 week summer holidays, swings and roundabouts I suppose.

I find 9-5 the most difficult pattern for school runs! I now work shifts so get to do loads of school runs. I would definitely be very unhappy if I didn't ever get to do any. I work 30 hrs. Last week I missed two full days of school runs, this week I missed one pick up, next week I will also miss just one pick up. If I worked 9-5 I would miss pretty much all the school runs! My dh does them on the days I cannot - or my parents.

Have you thought of advertising locally for general help, based around school hours? Just mentioning it as I'm disabled and frequently need help at odd hours - most of my helpers like to be free for school collections and it's always worked out well, even though the basic hours here are only two weekly. If you stress varied nature of job (and use of car) this could mean having say an extra hour here and there for help with housework, shopping, garden etc and all at a lower rate than the cost you mention.

Have you thought of advertising locally for general help, based around school hours? Just mentioning it as I'm disabled and frequently need help at odd hours - most of my helpers like to be free for school collections and it's always worked out well, even though the basic hours here are only two weekly. If you stress varied nature of job (and use of car) this could mean having say an extra hour here and there for help with housework, shopping, garden etc and all at a lower rate than the cost you mention.

Have you thought of advertising locally for general help, based around school hours? Just mentioning it as I'm disabled and frequently need help at odd hours - most of my helpers like to be free for school collections and it's always worked out well, even though the basic hours here are only two weekly. If you stress varied nature of job (and use of car) this could mean having say an extra hour here and there for help with housework, shopping, garden etc and all at a lower rate than the cost you mention.

Have you thought of advertising locally for general help, based around school hours? Just mentioning it as I'm disabled and frequently need help at odd hours - most of my helpers like to be free for school collections and it's always worked out well, even though the basic hours here are only two weekly. If you stress varied nature of job (and use of car) this could mean having say an extra hour here and there for help with housework, shopping, garden etc and all at a lower rate than the cost you mention.

Have you thought of advertising locally for general help, based around school hours? Just mentioning it as I'm disabled and frequently need help at odd hours - most of my helpers like to be free for school collections and it's always worked out well, even though the basic hours here are only two weekly. If you stress varied nature of job (and use of car) this could mean having say an extra hour here and there for help with housework, shopping, garden etc and all at a lower rate than the cost you mention.

Have you thought of advertising locally for general help, based around school hours? Just mentioning it as I'm disabled and frequently need help at odd hours - most of my helpers like to be free for school collections and it's always worked out well, even though the basic hours here are only two weekly. If you stress varied nature of job (and use of car) this could mean having say an extra hour here and there for help with housework, shopping, garden etc and all at a lower rate than the cost you mention.

Have you thought of advertising locally for general help, based around school hours? Just mentioning it as I'm disabled and frequently need help at odd hours - most of my helpers like to be free for school collections and it's always worked out well, even though the basic hours here are only two weekly. If you stress varied nature of job (and use of car) this could mean having say an extra hour here and there for help with housework, shopping, garden etc and all at a lower rate than the cost you mention.

Have you thought of advertising locally for general help, based around school hours? Just mentioning it as I'm disabled and frequently need help at odd hours - most of my helpers like to be free for school collections and it's always worked out well, even though the basic hours here are only two weekly. If you stress varied nature of job (and use of car) this could mean having say an extra hour here and there for help with housework, shopping, garden etc and all at a lower rate than the cost you mention.

Ah I see.

I think it's hardest if you work in a school and lack the flex. With a lot of other jobs you can make most of the assemblies etc - they tend to time them at 9am or just before pickup, and one or other parent can attend and make up the hour or so later. Positive attitude - it's really normal for parents of school age children to work, employers are used to these adjustments. But also choose your job carefully.

I think 2 parents working FT with school age children is really tricky, especially when they are young primary age. My heart sinks a little when people say they are giving up work but will go FT the minute their 4 year old starts school. Anything's possible, but it's not an easy road for parents or child.