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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

What is the most audacious lie your young kids have pulled off?

53 replies

brasty · 14/11/2017 12:16

My nephew went to a primary school who made a big fuss on birthdays. Nephew when he was 6 got to early afternoon being made a fuss off, before a teacher realised it wasn't actually his birthday.

OP posts:

MarklahMarklah · 14/11/2017 23:24

Not in any way convincing but DD (6) told me a few nights ago when I was putting her to bed that she was scared of the shark that was coming into the room. She dived under the bedcovers and wouldn't come out for about 10 minutes, and was pretending to cry.

She also told me a while ago that she'd received an award at school but they didn't have the badge/cup/sticker and so she'd gone up on the stage in assembly and the Head teacher had given her a cuddle and a kiss.

Pickledonion24 · 15/11/2017 09:35

Loving all of these

needtogiveitablow · 15/11/2017 09:45

My DS (then nearly 3) told us that his nursery teacher took him to Asda cafe for lunch - he was so convincing we had to ring and check! He also (weirdly) claims I once drove him off a bridge - he hasn’t said this for a while but from age 2-3 if we went near one he used to ask me not to drive him off it again 😳

ToesInWater · 15/11/2017 10:22

I work as a mediator with separated families. At the start of one session the dad comes in and says to the mum “I can’t believe you bought the kids a dog without telling me. They miss it so much when they come to my house that I have had to buy them a puppy”. Mum replied “I didn’t buy them a dog”

notagain123456 · 15/11/2017 12:06

i found a pair of gloves down the back of the toilet with the fingers cut off. She needed the gloves the following day for a school trip so i was cross. She denied any knowledge of it and tried to blame her brother and then her friend who she was playing with earlier, i didnt believe her until my mum rang a couple of days later and told me she is sure my daughter didnt cut the fingers off as she had told her she didnt do it and was really upset i had blamed her. i 100% believed her at this point and thought she wouldnt have told grandma if she had done it.

4 years later she confesses! I must admit i found it quite funny

Dustysparrow · 15/11/2017 12:25

Not my DD but some of the kids in her class who tell her these tall tales about themselves, which she always falls for hook, line and sinker bless her.

We've had the one where a girl at school claimed her mum had a fake foot - she doesn't.

We've had the one who said the Queen lent her some clothes.

We've had the one who said she used to live in our house (she didn't).

We've had one who claimed to have baby twin siblings, one of whom had the same name as my dd apparently - none of it true.

We've had the one who said she was moving next door to us - not true.

We had the one who brought a (shop bought) teddy bear into Rainbows and said her mum had made it.

There was the one who told my dd that a murderous ghost haunted a nearby school and had killed two children there.

My dd just believes everything she is told . I have to explain to her on a regular basis that basically a lot of kids talk a load of crap and you shouldn't believe everything you hear.

Dustysparrow · 15/11/2017 12:28

Oh, just remembered a really naughty semi-lie my dd told me when she was in Year R. She said that a girl in her class had bitten her, was pretty convincing. We were in the car on the way to swimming at this point. When we got there she presents her arm to me with a fresh bite mark complete with fresh saliva. It was pretty obvious she had just done it herself. Whether this girl at school had actually bitten her or not I'll never know, but she clearly felt she needed to produce some compelling 'evidence' to present to me!!!

LakieLady · 15/11/2017 12:35

I used to tell total strangers that I had a sister, but she lived in China because her daddy was a Chinaman. I am fair-skinned, grey-eyed and clearly have no Chinese blood and this was in the late 50s when inter-racial marriages were frowned up.

I also told my teacher that my daddy had been to Borstal (the old name for Young Offenders Institutions). That was an innocent mistake though, he actually went to boarding school and I'd got the wrong end of the stick.

Original poster

brasty · 15/11/2017 13:05

ToesinWater I absolutely love that.

OP posts:

Theresamayscough · 15/11/2017 13:10

As a child my dh told his teachers that his sis had her run over by a lorry!! And was in hospital.

The school had a huge assembly and collection for her and dh went to the toy shop with the head to choose toys for her.

They then took them to dh house to meet his mum and discovered the sis had a cold.

Family legend.

Theresamayscough · 15/11/2017 13:13

Oh and as teenagers my lads filled out a form In my name to join the local neighbourhood watch group.

I only found out when a gentleman knocked on my door with a list of streets I was responsible for and a name badge for me!

I was so embaressed I actually did 6 months and held 2 meetings at my house. Bizarre time. Little bastards

JayoftheRed · 15/11/2017 13:14

Not my children (although I've no doubt if I thought hard enough I could come up with something), but me...

When I was about 6/7 I showed my mum a big bite mark on my arm and told her that my younger brother had bitten me. Mum was all set to yell at him when she looked again and pointed out that the teeth imprint in my skin had all its teeth, whereas my little brother didn't.

That's right, I'd bitten myself in an attempt to get him "done."

Similar thing with a load of pears she'd left to ripen on the window sill. A bite out of each one - not me, had to be DB. No, because he doesn't have enough teeth to make these marks... I never learned.

Theresamayscough · 15/11/2017 13:18

OMG jay do you get on now?

Original poster

brasty · 15/11/2017 13:23

TheresaMay Your DH was obviously a convincing liar

OP posts:

Theresamayscough · 15/11/2017 13:25

I know very disturbing Bratsy

Clawdy · 15/11/2017 13:30

My niece brought home a tiny puppy she had found abandoned in a nearby field. She begged to keep it, and parents reluctantly agreed, and were eventually won over. A few weeks later one of her friends came round, and was overheard saying " Wow, he is so like his mum!" as she stroked the pup. Turned out the friend's dog had had a litter weeks ago, and my niece, knowing parents would say no if she asked for one, decided a sob story would work better - which it did.

Mittens1969 · 15/11/2017 14:27

Oncewasawarrior, believe it or not, it does actually help neutralise a jellyfish sting to put urine on it. Because wee is acidic and a jellyfish sting is alkaline. I was stung by a jellyfish many years ago in the south of France and that was recommended. Needless to say, we didn’t take that advice lol.

Member984815 · 15/11/2017 18:52

I have a friend who as a child faked stomach pain to get out of school, he was too convincing and ended up having his appendix removed his mother still doesn't know he faked the pain

JustDanceAddict · 15/11/2017 19:06

DD once pretended to sleepwalk. We were on holiday and I was already up. She walked into the lounge looking really out of it and I walked her back to bed. She said nothing and got up a while later. She said she could remember nothing of the incident, but I know when I was a child I did a similar thing according to my mum. Anyway, a couple of years later in year 6 I said we should tell her teacher before she went on the residential and she admitted to making the whole thing up’cant believe you thought I was sleepwalking’, ‘I fooled you’ type thing. I’m still not 100% sure she wasn’t though as was soooo convincing!!

Pickledonion24 · 15/11/2017 21:50

I can’t think of any I’ve done or someone else has

Polkadot1974 · 15/11/2017 21:59

Reading Graham Norton’s autobiography and the appendix thing happened to him!

otherdoor · 15/11/2017 22:07

There was a girl at my sister's preschool who had a milk allergy so she got to have orange juice when the other kids had milk.

My sister preferred orange juice so told the teacher she was allergic to milk too and it worked! My DM was so embarrassed when she was challenged about why she hadn't thought to inform the preschool about her daughter's allergy

SparklyUnicornPoo · 15/11/2017 22:14

my very first school job a reception child told me all about the baby in mummy's tummy and her going to hospital so they could use jelly to see it on the tv screen, they'd picked names and announces mummy had gone to the hospital to pick up the new baby. Didn't see the mum for a few weeks which was unusual, next time she picked her child up I was all cheery 'congratulations, hows it all going?' There was no baby, she'd just changed her work hours.

NameChangedAndForgotOldName · 15/11/2017 22:26

I got away with a lie for 25 years before I told my mum

One day my mum sent me and my brother up to tidy our room, I was 8 he was 6.
Instead we decided to set up an obstacle course and play krypton factor, I fell on an obstacle into the corner of a chest of drawers slicing open my cheek which needed stitches.

We told my mum i bent down to pick something u when I was tidying and banged my face...

Fuckoffee · 15/11/2017 23:13

I’ve just found out my DD has been lying about her swimming capabilities. She is a good swimmer - she can do crawl, butterfly and dive down to pick up things from the bottom of the pool. We go for lessons and swim together lots. School thought she couldn’t swim. Like at all. She is in a group in the learner pool and walks rather than swims.
I asked her why - it’s because the big pool is too cold, she prefers the learner pool because it’s warm like having a bath

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