Neighbour swearing at my children

[smilingsweet]

Little bit of a back story to this. I moved in just over a year ago and didn't seem to have any problems at all with neighbour next door. Three months ago I had a knock at the door from the police, they searched my home and stated that the said neighbour had made continuous phone calls reporting that my home was some sort of cannabis factory!

No cannabis here I'm afraid. The police officers said that she clearly isn't mentally well and said they would refer her to the mental health unit - I've said nothing and not seen the neighbour up until 3 days ago.

I have two sons, 7 and 8 who play football in our garden, she has kept their balls by her back door which I thought was strange, why not throw them back over?

The children were in the garden and myself in the kitchen. They asked for their balls politely to which she replied "no"! I heard that came out and said erm, hello? Can you please give their footballs back, then she replied no, and if they keep coming here I will be throwing them in the electric box (an area behind both our gardens with large high voltage warning signs) she claims the ball hit her back door and made her jump when she was in her kitchen and fears one of the balls will damage her water feature. I've got very ranty saying they are children and the reason she is keeping them is because the police left here empty handed. She told me I must have gotten 'whiff' of them coming so I removed all the drugs!! anyhow later that evening she threw them back over.

Upon speaking to the person that lived here before she had done the EXACT same thing and she made his life hell as far as I'm aware, continuous calls to the police about a cannabis factory!! Coincident?

I have called the housing on the first instance when the police came around and never heard back from them. I have called again to explain about the children's balls but I fear it will fall on deaf ears again.

Anyhow, yesterday my eldest son was bouncing on the trampoline and came running in to tell me she was sticking her middle finger up at him through her window!!! At which point I just don't know what to do so I told of him to come inside and we went off to our party.

Today one of the balls went back over her garden, whilst the children were in the garden she came straight out shouted at my two sons "piss off you mother fuckers" and yes, threw the ball into the electric box area so it cannot be retrieved! They've ran inside to tell me as I'm making my way through downstairs to go into the garden I hear her screeching at the top of her lungs "evil fucking mother" literally screamed! By the time I've opened the garden door she has gone inside and slammed hers.

What do I do?!!!!

two police officers in non uniforms (had boots on)

I'm intrigued as to why plain clothes officers boots are worth noting?!

Were they special boots? Sparkly boots? 6" high heeled boots?

Ok. Read them all and the amount of people what ha put me down to saying I'm lying and I'm an awful neighbour and my implying my children must be awful too- please! Honestly so untrue! I am not a bad neighbour at all we are not a loud family and have given this woman no reason whatsoever to swear at my children in the slightest, whenever I have seen her I have always been polite and never disrespectful and never even confronted her about the cannabis issue with the police. The balls are not constantly going into her garden at all if that were the case I would understand. It's been so frustrating reading the comments I've received on here and won't be replying one by one stating that I am not a liar. I've never in my life had any issues with a neighbour at all. When I spoke to the previous tenant and he told me that the same had happened to him he was genuinely shocked and told me he didn't think I would have the same problems.

Thank you to those who actually did give advice!! As that's what I came her for, not to be called a liar and to control my children in their garden.

What I will be taking away from this is the advise that I should keep a diary which I will now be doing.

Please do not assume I've been untruthful in any way whatsoever- there is no need for me to. As much as a lot of you are assuming that the police wouldn't discuss particular matters with me, well they did! Right in my living room sat on my sofa, I did not dream it up that they were going to put a referral in and did say that he knew a particular person within my housing personally.

Jesus.

And you would be within your rights to put a complain in about what they told you, that's outrageous.

Non uniform have special boots with a weed sniffing detector in.
They also have the ability to ignore any paperwork and just phone a friend.

Not many people know that. ( Taps side of nose knowingly)

As much as a lot of you are assuming that the police wouldn't discuss particular matters with me, well they did! Right in my living room sat on my sofa

Sorry, but 😂.

Carry on.

As that's what I came her for, not to be called a liar and to control my children in their garden.

So you're not going to deal with your children's antisocial behaviour then? Because once or twice losing a ball in a neighbour's garden is understandable, but it's not an assumption to read this isn't the case. Put netting or similar up, otherwise you honestly lose any moral ground in this dispute, you are equally culpable in the issue.

"My children's antisocial behaviour" ?? Playing football in their garden? Oh please!

and have given this woman no reason whatsoever to swear at my children in the slightest,

You have 2-3 reasons with the ball going over. Then knocking for it back.
NDNs DC is the sweetest little thing, always polite but is football mad. I was glad when the end of summer came because it meant no more kickabouts against the bloody walls 1,000x a day!

Even that could test the patience of an equally footy mad neighbour.

It's extremely unprofessional of the Police to discuss another persons mental health with someone for such a minor 'crime' as this.

Oh and report these odd, highly unprofessional and inappropriate policemen who came around and sat on your sofa .

Playing football in their garden? Oh please!

Your neighbour has quite rightly complained, their 'playing' is having an effect on her personal space (not 'their garden') and possibly antagonising her mental health. You are refusing to take any action or even willing to look at a compromise. Yes that's antisocial behaviour.

I'm not sure why all the nasty comments either, my sisters neighbour complained to her HA about the way my sister brings her bins in lol and the HA told my sister they weren't taking it seriously and believed the neighbour had "mental health issues" so not hard to believe the police would say it.

dancing Because no one should be divulging anyone's medical history. These police officers could potentially lose their jobs by risking an informant safety and talking about her mental health issues.

Oh gawd, here come the irrelevant anecdotes.

Hey, OP, maybe they were pretend policemen and in cahoots with the NDN? Because nothing they said or did makes them sound like real ones.
I bet that's it! It was the NDN's BIL.on a windup.

Seriously though, other posters are correct. Their behaviour was very unprofessional and they could well face disciplinaries for telling you that sort of stuff.

Hope they're not on MN.

Housing associations and police officers are now qualified doctors?

They can state someone is mentally ill??

This will be in the daily mail tomorrow.... for once, I hope it is!!

Regardless of what has or hasn't happened in the past, and who's at fault, the advice you've been given still stands - leave her alone and stop balls going over the fence.

I'd throw the balls there as well -stop the kids doing that

Bet they are jumping on the trampoline and throwing them in her garden aiming for her water feature

Control your kids op

Paying for a net to be put up so that they can play, may be the best solution.

My sister did that.

My neighbour's (both sides and behind) this summer spent every day stood on my (yes my) new fence. The minute we came out until they went in. That is similar to 'playing' but equally as intrusive and had an impact on my health until i eventually lost it smd told them all to get down (after politely asking for ages).
Your kids are being a nuisance. They are upsetting someone regardless of what she has said/not said blah blah.
Control your kids and play football st the park.

Should have got your hose out and ‘cleaned’ your fence every day

running ha. I used to warn them id be 'touching up' the creosote . Lasted 10 mins then theyd be back on. Neighbours sick of me shouting tho so ldt theirs out to play instead. So mine now in garden undisturbed...

If it really is only a couple of times that the football has ended up in the NDN’s garden then that’s accidental and not really being a nuisance. There’s no reason to suppose that the OP isn’t being honest on that point either, I think we can take her at her word on that point.

Swizzle has a point, OP. Not once have you said 'my kids threw a ball into next door's garden.' It's all very vague, as if the balls have a will of their own.

Th odd ball is fine but I know how annoying it is for my elderly, arthritic mum to constantly answer the door and then chuck the ball back.

Could you try befriending her?

Your kids sound annoying. Control them. Even a nun would eventually swear at that.