Two minutes silence and refusing to serve customer

[BalugaBelle]

At work today I was on the checkout (large retail store) and the silence was announced over a tannoy.

A woman (on the phone) came up to the checkout during the silence, so I shushed her. Motioned to poppies next to till!

She then said, "I'm going to miss my train, please continue serving me!"

I refused, shook my head and sat silently for the two minutes.

At the end I put her items through, she moaned at me and called me rude and petty and then went on her merry way.

So was I being unreasonable to respect the two minutes silence, even if it meant a customer was unhappy at me doing so?

I know good customer service is needed but surely the two minutes silence takes priority? She clearly had no respect!

Quite frankly I didn't give a damn about her train, I was paying my respects as was everyone else in the shop. It was literally almost silent apart from young children (understandable) and general noise, i.e., heating making noises!

In a general way if I was out and about when one of these silences started, I would just quietly get on with whatever I was doing, as long as no one got in my face and started shushing or aggressively pointing at propaganda or whatever. My point is that preventing people from leaving a shop just so you can compel them to join in with your rituals is sufficiently unacceptable that then they deserve to have their ritual disrupted.

I’m sure she wouldn’t have rushed you without good reason

This is hilarious. Funniest comment on the thread.

Reanimate I suspect it’s so you don’t disturb. Banging door etc. But like I said since it’s only120 seconds by the time you realised and started kicking off it would be over. And you’d just look like a bit of a clown.

They should probably lock the doors open. To stop people screaming for exit.

This silence & poppy observation nonsense is out of control. Utterly ridiculous bread & circuses hyped up beyond all reason.

No. It's a symbol for those in the British forces and their allies who died in conflicts. It does not include anyone who was not allied to, or serving with, the British.

The poppies grew on the graves of all the soldiers, German as well.

Some of us have respect for our dead relatives and the poppy appeal raises lots if money for the war graves commission

Can’t believe you think OP should have served. Where is your respect for the people who died to give us our feedom. It’s up to all of us to keep showing respect and not let standards slip. Surely the latest Terrorists attacks and crisis have shown all of us how valuable the armed and emergency services are? Respect people

Well they may have grown on German graves as well but this is why the British Royal Legion say we have the silence and wear the poppy, ‘Great Britain still believes strongly in remembering those who fought not only in World Wars, but the more than 12,000 British Servicemen and women killed or injured since 1945.’

@StrangeLookingParasite - The poppies grew on the graves of all the soldiers, German as well.

Yes, they did. However, have a look at the British Legion website and see what they say the poppy symbolises. They state: "The Legion advocates a specific type of Remembrance connected to the British Armed Forces, those who were killed, those who fought with them and alongside them."

Given it is they who market the poppy, and organise the whole appeal, I think their definition of what it symbolises is the most accurate one.

I think you were absolutely fine not to serve her, but I do hate the policing of remembrance that has become so common.

YANBU she could have gone to the self service till or just dropped her basket and gone to catch her train bus etc . It is such a very small thing to do , show a little respect to those that died for us and their country. Good for you OP, I salute you !

This thread is ridiculous, the op doesn’t have an Aibu she just wanted to froth at the mouth for a bit and everyone has piled on to join in

... and then Butchy's rather fabulous round-up:
I actually think the OP herself was one of the least frothy. She just floated in from time to time to stir the froth without actually going full on nuclear herself.

I would have said the actual frothing peaked in posts at 15:16 and 18:03 and they weren’t the OP’s efforts.

Made me smile anyway. Life's too short for angst-ing over this and in the grand scheme of things nothing posted here is going to massively change anybody's view, is it? Live and let live... or 'Live On' as the BL strapline suggests. They will, because we really won't forget them.

I have Issues with enforced Remembrance and the red poppy and all sorts of things associated with it. I think it should always be a personal choice, never mandated, and that upbraiding anyone, public figure or not, for not choosing to observe or wear a poppy is appallingly rude.

But it cuts both ways: everyone has the right to observe how they want to. So if a business or an individual wants to observe, no customer is more important than the person helping them who wants to honour anyone who died in a war at the time and place that we as a society have set aside for that.

So YANBU, and well done for not serving her. (But I do think your company is a bit U for forcing it on people - if you had colleagues who were happy to serve, why couldn't they be at the front of the shop to do so, thus negating this whole incident?)

It is not on at all to interrupt anyone observing a silence. It's also not on to force someone to do so. The mannerly path here would have been to allow people not observing to quietly help others who were not observing, and if you didn't have anyone who wasn't doing the silence, the massively uncouth customer should have waited politely until you were all done.

And fwiw I won't wear a red poppy but I do observe the silence and I wouldn't have served her either - and this has happened to me at work and I was backed to the hilt by managers.

It's a sad state of affairs if people can't hang on for two minutes. If you are in that much of a hurry, why go into a store?

Also talking on the phone while dealing with people face to face is really rude. Either talk on the phone or face to face. You could at least show people who work in a store the same courtesy you would show everyone else. They are people not machines.

The OP did not say the shopper was talking on the phone while interacting with her. She said she was talking on the phone during the silence.

If a Muslim worker in Aldi can refuse to serve people buying alcohol products because of their beliefs, I don't see why the OP can't refuse to serve someone (for 2 minutes) because of her beliefs.

All I see is "I" this and "I" that from those who object to the 2 minute silence. Some of you who object to the public demonstration of respect may very well prefer a private moment but you know what, sometimes it is important for a society to have a collective moment to show how they feel. This is how future generations will remember because it becomes a collective tradition.

To all those who say they have an ideological objective. Fine, i object to lots of stuff but guess what, I respect other people's view. Won't cost you anything to just be quiet for 2 minutes. Expecting others to break their silence isn't clever.

Very much my view @Bicyclethief. Everyone should be free to observe or not, it's their own choice, and just because someone is forced to be in a societally-mandated servile position during the silence by dint of being a shop assistant doesn't mean they should have to alter their principles for someone else. We're all people even when we're doing our jobs.

But you (general) don't get to stipulate that, Bicyclethief. Many of us do observe but without a fanfare or the need to keep a beady eye on what other people are doing. There are too many shush-ers out there who make an absolute spectacle of themselves and that is just as disrespectful. If you're actually concentrating on remembrance, how do other people manage to distract you or divert your attention from that?

I don't know where you're getting an objection to a public demonstration from because does anybody truly object? Interfere? No they don't, but they may decide not to participate themselves and they're free to make that choice.

OP's store could have handled this situation much better, preventing it from even becoming an issue. Maybe they will do better next year.

Lyingwitch, the lady who expected to be served interfered hence the thread. No I don't get to say how people should or should not observe. I'm just saying, respect other people's view and just be silent.

theymademejoin

OP said the customer approached the cash register while talking loudly on the phone. She could have put the phone away before going to the register. Customer was rude and I don't buy that "missing train" excuse. If you have time to shop you have time to catch a train. What if there had been other customers before her?

YANBU I'm shocked that people think you were. It's 2 minutes. She probably still caught her train. She should be the one questioning her actions, not the OP.

As an aside Witch being disturbed does not actually show that you weren’t concentrating on rememberence.
You’re not necessarily in a trance.

Also, everyone saying the store should have handled it better. I'm fed up with these types of argument, do we need third parties to tell us how to behave every five minutes, even my 5 year old doesn't need this sort of guidance!

@InternetHoopJumper - apologies. I missed that she said she was on the phone in the op. I only spotted her update on the shopper talking to her friend on the phone which wasn't specific. Yes, that is rude, even if she had stopped talking to engage with op.