Leave during term time - wibu

[oblada]

I'm sure the subject has been done ad nauseatum but hey :) just curious! I asked the school to authorised 2 days off for my daughter. She's in YR1. The days are Friday and Monday in a few weeks time. The reason for it is that my grandmother is 90 years old this year and my whole family is throwing her a surprise birthday party that week-end. My family is abroad (where I am from) so that's where the party is. Hence the 4 days required as 1 travelling there then 2 days 'party'/event and 1 travelling back. Most of my family will be there incl people I haven't seen in 10+ years, family settled in Australia, family we barely ever see etc. I've organised a bloody massive photobook requesting pics from everyone as a little gift for my grandma (took me bloody ages!). Anyway it's going to be great, she has no idea, she bloody deserves it :) we obviously wouldn't miss it for the world and that includes my children. Only one is school aged. She's never sick (only chickenpox last year) and no issue academically. Anyway permission has been refused. Obviously we will still go. And face the consequences (a fine right? 60pounds? Or more?).

But I was wondering WIBU to request it? Would others simply not attend such events? I mean it's not going to change my views but curious to know how others feel about it. This is such a subjective topic. We're not British so maybe cultural in part. Not to say we would go to every birthday under the sun! We've not been to my mother's 60th or my MIL 60th. But both of them are young enough to travel and see us regularly whereas my grandma can't anymore.

We won't even go back for Xmas as can't afford it. My parents will come over but of course not my grandmother.

Anyway just wondering really :) what have ppl taken their kids off school for? What have ppl requested permission for and when has it been granted? Would you take child's attendance/academic level/school year into consideration or expect it to be taken into account?

Xx

It's unlikely to be authorised but you can take it as unauthorised anyway.

Oh and next time, just say she's ill

Don't lie. Your DC will also have to lie when they return, which isn't on.

Honestly for 2 days I would have just called in sick for her, nothing they can do then

We're actually going to be home educating because I'll be fucked if someone else is going to tell me what to do with my own child.

You sound like the sort no one wants hanging round the school gate anyway

Oh and next time, just say she's ill.

Please don't do this. DC are rubbish at lying. The school will know.

I've heard of absences such as this being authorised as "exceptional circumstances" so you never know.

I’ve rung in sick on 3 occasions over last year & they’ve never even asked about it so my daughter has never had to lie.

Thanks a lot ppl! I guess we're the sort to try and do things by the books (well especially the husband!) And for it to be unauthorised without further explanation felt a bit odd really, like we're doing something wrong... I understand it a bit more now but still feel the system is a mess really!

Wow annabelleh I bet they begged you on bended knee to keep your kids in the school didn't they?

I think you should ask permission with the knowledge that it will be refused, and then go anyway without giving it a second thought. If you lie, your dc will almost certainly give it away when they get back to school.

I know a teacher in a similar situation, father turning 90, living in another country. They requested a week off unpaid (it was the other side of the world, so a long journey time), in term time. The school were very good and granted it no problem, recognising that it was a special situation.

I am sorry your headteacher is such a dickhead. I would certainly go anyway.

Ds is going to be off school for at least the rest of this week after a day in hospital today. His teacher has kindly offered to send home a few bits of work just so he can grasp this weeks topics. That’s because him being off is unavoidable, it is wrong for people to expect work home when they are making the choice to go away

Oh I don't expect the teacher to give us anything, there is hardly any homework anyway and she does a lot of reading and maths at home with our own stuff so she definitely won't fall behind :) I was very surprised by the refusal I have to say and I couldn't justify not going and not taking my kids to this!

You request was not U. The (dick)Head Teacher was.

Is there a reason why the teacher can't just give your daughter the work she'll miss out on in advance? Didn't they used to be organised and have lesson plans sorted weeks ahead or are they all shoddy at time management?

Aren't you a delight

Just go.
Don't think about it, don't bother with a form, don't worry about a fine, don't worry about posting it on mn nor chatting about it in real life, or home educating because of it.
Just go.

Just because an absence has to be unauthorised, doesn't mean that the school 'disapproves of what you are doing, just that they can't authorise it under current guidelines.

I think parents can view a 'no we can't authorise this' as 'a red cross against the piece of work' type of response from the school, rather than as a simple piece of information 'it is an absence that comes into category a not category b'.

So under your circumstances, as a teacher I would wish your child well and hope they have an extremely happy weekend; however I would have to mark it as an unathorised absence in the register. I would not provide work, but I would encourage your child to read every day, if capable to perhaps write a postcard or bring in some pictures to talk about, maybe to handle the different currency and buy something with it.

Nothing will happen for 2 days of absence of this type over a year.

Our school has a notice up saying there were 332 missed pupil days of school in October. In a school of 500 children. In a month where there were only 16 school days. And that is apparently above average for the Local Authority. I’m sure each of those parents had what they deemed to be a great reason for each of those days, but I’m involved with a charity who provide school meals for children in developing and war torn countries in order to reach the millions of children across the world who have restricted access to education and it is frustrating to think some people in the U.K. have such a cavalier attitude to education.

That said, despite the fact that all these odd days here and there build up to a big statistic, each of these cases is an individual choice. There are so many different considerations, each parent has to make their own decision based on their own circumstances.

I literally just returned today from a long weekend in the US for my grandmother's 90th! My DC's primary authorised it with no problem, so it seems to be either inconsistent depending on where you live, or our school realises that we're a dual citizen family, so that is the exceptional circumstance. To be fair, this is the first time we've ever gone to the US during term time, we usually go in the summer, so we've never asked before.
Even if it's unauthorised, you should go. My grandmother was over the moon that we were there, and it was a great celebration. You won't regret going!

When I took mine out for similar I basically got told ‘We cannot authorise this. Have a lovely time...’

I’m a teacher and I think what you’re doing is perfectly reasonable. I hope you have a great time 😀

Oki, getting it a bit more... Emailed HT to explain further (very nicely) and her response is thanks for explaining, still can't authorised but have a fab time! LOL this is sooooo weird! A potentially a bit discriminatory but hey ho if I'm not going to be fined and it's all dandy and normal then I'll live with it and think of it no further! Still feels odd. Should have rebelled more as a kid maybe :) I'm too rule-abiding!

As everyone else has said, it's policy not to authorise it but the school itself will understand.

DD in yr 1 would have been authorised. BUT she was in a private school. I think it's disgraceful that private schools are exempt, the headteachers can and do authorise leave. Lancashire County Council only started asking for attendance stats from private schools in January 2017 so before that there was no way anyone in a private could be fined yet they had a policy of fining anyone off 5 days or more in state (believe Lancashire are one of the highest LAs for number of fines). Even now unless a head reports it as unauthorised private school parents wont be fined.
DD's School would have wished her a nice weekend, maybe had her up in assembly to talk about it and used it as a learning opportunity. Sweets from other country brought back for class, photos shared etc.
Such a shame. If I were you I would have requested leave not lied she was sick but I can see why people do.

"We're actually going to be home educating because I'll be fucked if someone else is going to tell me what to do with my own child. Let alone a pen pusher in a Head Teacher's jacket who just wants offsted numbers. You request was not U. The (dick)Head Teacher was."

What type of jacket do you imagine headteacher wears?

Anyhoo, you sound like a wonderful role model for your child; I think it's best for everyone that you homeschool rather than inflict your 'parenting' on some poor teachers.

I think it's good that you asked permission and told school. Do not lie or get your child to lie. I could never put my children in that position.

I would still go.

Also here it is £60 per child per parent so it would be £120 wouldn't it?