To sue the NHS over my birthing experience

[boomitscountginula]

Now before I get flamed to death. I do appreciate my birth story isn't as bad as some but, I now refuse to have another baby unless I can get assurances that this won't happen again, and the only way I can do so is to go private, I think.? It was traumatic to me.

I had a quite easy birth, in terms of how long it took "officially" but I wasn't listened to and have a couple of long lasting injuries I think could of been prevented if they believed I was in labour to begin with.

My birth story: I woke up the day after my due day and had lost my plug over night. Went for a stretch and sweep at lunch, (planned as it was my first) with my midwife said I was 3cm already.

Fabulous, no pain at the minute, now 3cm easy birth.. so I thought.

Went home had a nap, woke up with contractions near tea time. By 9pm they where regularly 6 minutes apart so rang the maternity ward, had a phone assessment and went in.

Got into maternity triage, in absolute agony, had a physical exam and the triage said:

"Your only 3 cm, you need to come home and come back."

I said well as you can see, I am contacting every 6 minutes and less now, the pain is overwhelming and I feel like I need to push.

She tutted and said in all her experience she had never been wrong and I had hours to go, so needed to go home.

I was in bits at this news and crumbled. I never wanted an epidural and chose pethidine (sic) and gas and air. So agreed I would go home but I needed some kind of pain killer, that I could have with my chosen birth plan. I really put my foot down and said I will go home but only if I can get a pain killer stronger that the 2 paracetamol I had taken already.

She said she would find a doctor, but never came back.

Meanwhile I then go into the advanced stages of Labour. Bare in mind I had two paracetamol and my waters haven't broken. It's like trying to birth a gym ball.

I am literally screaming in pain in a side room in maternity triage, pushing and effectively giving birth myself. My partner and my mum (both birth partners) took it in turns to find anyone. But no one came for 45 minutes.

After 45 minutes a junior midwife came in and said "oh my god your in labour".

Me and her literally ran to the deliver ward, where I was given gas and air.

I took a massive gulp of it, and was told off, because I should only take it when I am in pain and contracting..... never mind the two hours I have just been in hospital alone labouring, without a monitor on my baby or any pain relief.

I am still not hooked up to monitor, the only medical intervention is gas and air right now. My waters still haven't broken, 4 minutes later I was given the pethidine. 2 minutes after that I crown, baby in sack. Midwife broke the waters and my son was born. My official record shows that I was in labour for 9 minutes.

I had pain relief 4 minutes into my 9 minute birth and at no point was I on any kind of contraction monitoring machine. Nothing monitoring baby's heartbeat etc etc. I might as well have birthed in the woods.

I also split my right labia in two during the birth. The midwife didn't want to stitch it because it wasn't that bad.. yet I couldn't pee, unless in the bath for 3 weeks, and now that side is an inch longer than the other. Causing me, well you can imagine.

Start to finish I was treated like dirt, I was left labouring in a room alone, I was belittled and injured without proper treatment. And now I am afraid to be pregnant again.

I love the NHS, but they have let me down, massively. I am permanently injured (labia) and mentally scarred. But hate the idea of sueing the NHS on a theoretical level...

Yikes this is all very hurtful. I am neither a bitch, a witch, a cunt or thick as mince.

I am dedicated, kind, respectful, and I go to the ends of the earth for the women I look after. And my suturing is spot on

By the way midwives don’t do forceps so don’t blame those botched forceps on us.

Doctors really are not the hero’s that you make out. We ALL work as a team playing our part.

Thetoothyteeth you really are coming across as quite nasty. No need.

sunshine has been posting throughout the thread teeth and been thoroughly respectful to all. Your aggression is unnecessary.

I am very very sorry that some people have had these experiances at the hands of my colleagues. As I have said in previous posts.

I am not a martyr - I just love my job.

I am also a woman who has used maternity services and my labours were difficult and hard also. And believe it or not I was also traumatised by one of them!

Its not just midwives doctors can be the same. In fact it can be in all professions some people feel that they no best and can be dismissive of others.

Its just in the medical profession the consequences can be great - and an ability to listen to the patient and there concerns is something that they need.

Congratulations on the birth of your DS.
I had a very similar experience with DD1 to you. I had no pain relief at all apart from 2 paracetamol and the staff refused to believe I was giving birth despite the fact I was in agony.
However I wouldn’t sue if I were you. I would try to put it behind you and concentrate on the fact you have a healthy son.
I do understand how traumatic it is and it took me a long time to get over it.
I recently had DD2 and I made it clear exactly what happened last time and this time all my wishes and requests for pain relief were accommodated.
I hope in time you heal and can enjoy your son x

I understand how you feel OP. Even now, years after I gave birth to my DC, if someone introduces themselves as a MW, I shudder and think of all the women this person may have tortured. Irrational, I know but birth trauma stays with you.

I’m sure if MW just listened to women in their care and were not so dismissive, this would surely help any labouring women think that her needs and concern were being taken seriously. When you are in pain, you do not want the person who has care and control and access to pain relief to be rolling their eyes and tutting.

I’ve worked in A&E. Can you imagine the scene if I rolled my eyes and tutted if someone was lying on a stretcher with a broken leg and I told them that they were not in enough pain yet, or offer them two paracetamol, or tell them “I’ll get some pain relief” and disappear. I wouldn’t last very long as a nurse.

Good luck.

Too many stories of botched forceps deliveries

Doctors do forceps deliveries, not midwives.

@rosy oh so do midwives just wave them around to be intimidating? Why have women been faced with midwives with forceps if they're not meant to use them? Genuinely confused

Possibly because it's the midwives that do the tours and the antenatal education classes? Possibly because rightly or wrongly most people feel that women should have all information available to them, and this may include knowing what a pair of forceps looks like. Though I admit it doesn't sound like this was done in an appropriate manner.

I wouldn't sue over that, I had an awful first labour (I said after it never again but 3 years later I did).

I'm scarred quite badly, I can't use tampons etc, it's changed my sex life etc.

But I count my blessings that both my baby and I are healthy

I'm scarred quite badly, I can't use tampons etc, it's changed my sex life etc

So you’re NOT healthy then @LexieLulu

If I could not use tampons as a result of childbirth I’d bring action against that trust. You have been physically damaged. Do you know why or is it “just a childbirth thing”?

Half way through the replies.

I am quite sorry for starting this, because a) I didn't really mean sue. I was quite upset when I posted as me and DP was just discussing trying for our second and I just suddenly got the fear. It was a reaction to a feeling and that's all.

B) I am so sad to read the stories I have read so far. Some of these are quite moving, and anger inducing. I am really sorry for the experiences and loss people have had. It's truely terrible.

I am however, also glad I started this post, there seems between some other posters, a healthy debate about maternity services and the treatment of women who use them.

For all those who have made suggestions, I am talking to my GP. I have decided to not get a debrief of my birth experience. I think I would just find more things to be anxious about.

I actually do indirectly know a private midwife, she is the wife of an old colleague. Given how "quick" my last labour was. A home birth for the next is something I have considered. And we do have a nest egg that would pay for this, thankfully.

A home birth would be ideal, especially as they made me stay two nights because I have flat nipples and was struggling breastfeeding.

Apparently because my notes said I wanted to breast feed they wouldn't let me go until my son latched on successfully. I was crying trying to get discharged. They wouldn't let me go home!! Then some women came round asking me if I would do a patient survey.

I can't pretend I didn't get irrationally angry and overwhelming upset, so may have snot cried/screamed at her..

Anyway, thank you all for your opinions. Even the ones I didn't agree with!

I don't think it's unusual to have a fear of doing it all over again. I certainly did and took me 3 years to even consider a second - that was with an uncomplicated first delivery. Second one arrived before we got anywhere near delivery suite so avoided a lot of potential pitfalls (though wouldn't recommend it...). If a private midwife will give you some reassurance moving forward it sounds like a good idea

Please don't feel bad for starting this. Discussion can only help both women and the people looking after them in pregnancy and childbirth. I think everyone wants to see positive change. I'm not a midwife. I'm a midwifery support worker so I'm responsible for helping with supporting midwives by caring for women and babies, doing observations and helping with breastfeeding etc whilst they get on with actually delivering babies and usually being moved from room to room to do this. They hate the impersonal care as much as the women in their care do and often say they'd like to be doing what I do if the pay wasn't so crap!!

I think you'd find a home birth a really healing experience and each hospital has an NHS home birth team so you wouldn't have to pay. You'd get one to one care in your own clean environment and garenteed a midwife who is skilled and experienced in birth, suturing and every other part of a midwives job.

You have every right to feel traumatised by your experience because it was traumatic to you and no one explained what was happening or why it happerned.

Really good luck for next time

Surely every woman should be guaranteed a skilled midwife experienced in all aspects of the job. And there lies the problem. It may according to the lovely midwife above have become a graduate job but that isn't reflected in practice. My babies were born 20 years ago when 1:1 care was all the rage. They weren't that busy. There was no evidence even then of Care with a capital C. There has been something rotten in midwifery (and nursing too) for a very long time.

“There has been something rotten in midwifery (and nursing too) for a very long time.”

Agree. My late mum (who was a qualified midwife ) and retired after a career in nursing) agreed with this too.

In any organisation under stress the “people” aspect of the job is binned off first.

Structural meltdowns in any organisation mean that no time is perceived to exist for the human aspects of any role - that’s why in corporate cutbacks HR is usually the first department to be outsourced.

Compassion in the NHS is a rarity. Nobody has time. And having worked in a central role this is a known crisis in the NHS and because the rot is so deep almost nothing can be done except the good eggs stick around.

As I said above stick vulnerable scared pregnant women into this scenario and you have an explosive combination.

hope the good eggs stick around

Midwives are on the same sort of level as nurses aren't they? Obviously they work alongside doctors but so do nurses

Midwives are autonomous practitioners whereas nurses generally aren't. Midwives are a band higher in the NHS pay scales to reflect this.

Perhaps they need more supervision and less autonomy based on some of the stories here.

Well it works both ways doesn't it?

I recently admitted a lady to the labour ward who said she thought she was going to go into labour soon. She was niggling but not contracting. She requested a vaginal examination and was 2cm dilated. So not in established labour. But she told me that she felt things were very imminent and that when it happened it would be fast.

Guidelines said she should go home, the ward sister told me to send her home. The woman wanted to stay. So been an autonomous practitioner I argued her case and kept her there, not in labour, for the next 7 hours. I listened to her and believed her.

After 7 hours her waters suddenly went and she had a baby 15 mins later. But if I'd followed the guidelines/listened to the ward sister and doctors she would have had that baby at home on her own.

You're right, I think we do need more clinical supervision. Sadly the government removed midwifery supervision from us last year and we no longer have supervisors.

Gosh the government actually passed a bill stating that midwives no longer required any supervision. That's disgraceful. If you can quote me the statutory instrument I'll write to my MP and a BBC Producer who is a friend of mine.