To sue the NHS over my birthing experience

[boomitscountginula]

Now before I get flamed to death. I do appreciate my birth story isn't as bad as some but, I now refuse to have another baby unless I can get assurances that this won't happen again, and the only way I can do so is to go private, I think.? It was traumatic to me.

I had a quite easy birth, in terms of how long it took "officially" but I wasn't listened to and have a couple of long lasting injuries I think could of been prevented if they believed I was in labour to begin with.

My birth story: I woke up the day after my due day and had lost my plug over night. Went for a stretch and sweep at lunch, (planned as it was my first) with my midwife said I was 3cm already.

Fabulous, no pain at the minute, now 3cm easy birth.. so I thought.

Went home had a nap, woke up with contractions near tea time. By 9pm they where regularly 6 minutes apart so rang the maternity ward, had a phone assessment and went in.

Got into maternity triage, in absolute agony, had a physical exam and the triage said:

"Your only 3 cm, you need to come home and come back."

I said well as you can see, I am contacting every 6 minutes and less now, the pain is overwhelming and I feel like I need to push.

She tutted and said in all her experience she had never been wrong and I had hours to go, so needed to go home.

I was in bits at this news and crumbled. I never wanted an epidural and chose pethidine (sic) and gas and air. So agreed I would go home but I needed some kind of pain killer, that I could have with my chosen birth plan. I really put my foot down and said I will go home but only if I can get a pain killer stronger that the 2 paracetamol I had taken already.

She said she would find a doctor, but never came back.

Meanwhile I then go into the advanced stages of Labour. Bare in mind I had two paracetamol and my waters haven't broken. It's like trying to birth a gym ball.

I am literally screaming in pain in a side room in maternity triage, pushing and effectively giving birth myself. My partner and my mum (both birth partners) took it in turns to find anyone. But no one came for 45 minutes.

After 45 minutes a junior midwife came in and said "oh my god your in labour".

Me and her literally ran to the deliver ward, where I was given gas and air.

I took a massive gulp of it, and was told off, because I should only take it when I am in pain and contracting..... never mind the two hours I have just been in hospital alone labouring, without a monitor on my baby or any pain relief.

I am still not hooked up to monitor, the only medical intervention is gas and air right now. My waters still haven't broken, 4 minutes later I was given the pethidine. 2 minutes after that I crown, baby in sack. Midwife broke the waters and my son was born. My official record shows that I was in labour for 9 minutes.

I had pain relief 4 minutes into my 9 minute birth and at no point was I on any kind of contraction monitoring machine. Nothing monitoring baby's heartbeat etc etc. I might as well have birthed in the woods.

I also split my right labia in two during the birth. The midwife didn't want to stitch it because it wasn't that bad.. yet I couldn't pee, unless in the bath for 3 weeks, and now that side is an inch longer than the other. Causing me, well you can imagine.

Start to finish I was treated like dirt, I was left labouring in a room alone, I was belittled and injured without proper treatment. And now I am afraid to be pregnant again.

I love the NHS, but they have let me down, massively. I am permanently injured (labia) and mentally scarred. But hate the idea of sueing the NHS on a theoretical level...

I think that's a strange assumption carebear. It seems more likely from what the OP posted that given her presentation in triage (irregular contractions, only 3cm) that she was many hours, maybe days from
Giving birth. As a result it doesn't sounds like she'd been officially admitted, which explains why there was no offer of pain relief etc. Not excusing it, but this one you can sort of see why it unfolded

I'm sorry you feel traumatised. It's amazing how velnerable we can feel in hospital. Counselling would be healing for you.

If you look at all the positives (not of your treatment) of what your body can do. Your body is caperable of having a quick, low risk birth with minimal pain relief. You did that . Next time a homebirth could be good as you'll get one to one care with a really experienced midwife and hopefully have a similar experience (in the way you labour) to last time.

Aren’t you time barred anyway? Don’t know about England but in Scots Law you only have 3 years from a personal injury to raise a court action. So if it’s 4 years ago you may be out of time, without even commenting on if you have a case/ if it’s ethical to sue.

Aren’t you time barred anyway? Don’t know about England but in Scots Law you only have 3 years from a personal injury to raise a court action.

Yes the OP will be very close if not out of time.

Yabu to Sue. I know a lady who lost her baby due to a forceps delivery gone wrong which caused damaged to her son spinal cord which left him unable to breathe on his own he died 6 weeks later he would have been otherwise healthly. Put a complaint in by all means but just think of those woman who don’t get to take their dc home due to neglect.

I think you should speak to pals, seek counselling for yourself and if you did want another child you could request a c-section.

I've not rtft but I don't think you have grounds to sue as nothing actually went wrong. You cannot sue for what might have been or a bad experience.

I do know one woman who sued the nhs and was, eventually, successful. A traumatic birth and a lot of negligence caused her son, who was otherwise noted as being healthy, to have cerbal palsy as the negligence starved him of oxygen. She fought for almost 18 years, had to appeal to the highest court in the UK and fight non-stop for her claim. Eventually she waa succesful and awarded millions, which pales in comparison to having someone harm your baby and cause life changing conditions.

I had a bit dissimilar experience, with an added bit of consent issues in there. The unit was in dire straits staff wise at the time.

No, I wouldn't sue, but I would ask for a meeting with the senior midwife to go through your notes and talk about what action they have taken to prevent it happening again.

I haven't rtft sorry so someone might have suggested-

As for your future labour- have you considered a home birth? That way there is 121 care the whole way through. You clearly managed early labour really well last time and that way you would get g&a when you wanted, pool etc. home birth midwives are usually very experienced.

I’m sorry this happened to you and that it is still troubling you. I don’t want to make light of the horrible experience you had but to be honest I don’t think I’ve ever heard a first baby birth story that sounds much more pleasant than yours.
I used to know someone who worked on birth negligence cases and the cases were horrific- ie babies left severely brain damaged or mothers left doubly incontinent for life. Speak to a solicitor by all means but I think you may have an issue if you have left it 4 years anyway.

I had very similar experiences both times. But of my children ended up with infections. You can sue if you want to but you won't go anywhere. The courts won't touch the NHS unless they have literally killed you, even then it's not a sure thing.

I am so sorry you had such a frightening experience
Like so many PPs, I too had a difficult first birth, and your comments concerning not being listened to, birthplan ignored, and being left alone at a terrifying time, seem to resonate with many, certainly in my own friendship circle of women who prepared meticulously for our first births, taking every class and reading every book on natural childbirth going.
Like you, I privately raged against my NHS trust. Like you, for years I felt like I wouldn't be able to have another child. Even having sex was hugely problematic.
What eventually enabled me to move on, and resolved so much hurt and disappointment, was having a birth debrief. I requested my birth records and took them, along with my own notes and photographs (a selfie taken during delivery and some between the legs shots, documenting the carnage over the course of a few months), to see a private midwife who offered this service. I deliberately didn't see a midwife from my NHS trust as, even though I was not thinking of suing, I wanted to speak with someone who would be able to listen without being defensive. It was nothing short of amazing. The relief of being listened to, unhurriedly, by someone without an agenda, but a wealth of knowledge, who was able to answer my questions, was great. But more poignantly, she listened to my hurt. She let me share my birth plan and we talked about how I had wanted it to be. She looked at my photos with me and acknowledged the look of abject terror in my eyes in my selfie, and the pain my birth injuries must have caused me. She listened to me talk about how much I wanted a second child. During this conversation, I started to see that much of my lingering anger about my birth story was connected to my fear surrounding conceiving and birthing a second child. Because I was scared of history repeating itself, I was unable to let go of the very thing I was frightened of. If that makes sense.
My birth debrief was the best ££ I ever spent. It began the road to healing and eventually conceiving and making empowered choices around the birth of DD2. In my case, this meant a home birth, but might have been an elective cesarean, or whatever. DD2's birth was everything DD1's wasn't, and it somehow wrapped the whole thing up for me, I could let it go. And although I did aggravate my old birth injuries and was back to weeing in the bath and picking the shit out of my arse with my pinkie for another few months, because the narrative around the birth was so different, I wasn't too upset about it.
I hope you find a way of resolving the hurt you feel, and find a way to complete your family.

Honestly, if I posted about my (very traumatic to me) birth experience and a load of women told me I should feel lucky, that I had the birth they wished they had, that it sounds good to them etc that would be really damaging for me. I suspect people have been rubbed up the wrong way by the legal question and aren't considering the OP's strong emotional issues related to this event.

Raise a formal complaint and notify your MP as you do. Just because others have gone through this or worse doesn't mean it should be standard practice. This needs to stop. The glorifying of bad practice disgusts me because people are scared to stand up and say the NHS and it's staff can be utterly shit and cause physical and psychological harm to vulnerable people.

Complain the arse off it.

I don't think you have any damages to claim for but I understand how you feel. Look up the birth trauma association for some extra support. In the future, you might find a homebirth suits you?

I was traumatised by my induction that ended in c section. I requested a section second time and it was fine.

I’m sorry you have gone through something so bad but in all honestly, I wouldn’t sue in your position. The money that you could win if you sued would be better used for training.
Your experience will be different a second time round as you’ll assert yourself better than before and won’t get brushed off.

I’m not saying that what you went through wasn’t bad but people do go through worse. Their children either die or have life long conditions which means parents have to give up work to provide care for their child

I also think that there is a standard birth that midwives expect and quick births with continuous pain is not one of them - they should be trained to be more aware of them as the speed can be traumatic for mother and baby and does increase the risk of tearing - that should be the aim

Saying that, I would definitely get a birth debrief if I was you. Not sure if 4 years passing is possible to have one but worth asking.
You can also discuss all your concerns with your midwife. Your last birth will be in your new birth notes so you would hope that you wouldn’t experience the same

Women have to be much more assertive.

I can't believe I'm reading this here. giving birth is one of the most scary and vulnerable times in a woman's life. she should be cared for. well cared for. without having to insist on anything.

OP I had a similar experience to you of simply not being listened to. Tragically this also probably resulted in my son’s stillbirth - although not conclusively proven. (They’d have definitely followed a different procedure if two midwives hadn’t fucked up royally, and following different procedure probably would have saved him).

I received the full investigative report and chose not to sue. What’s the point of depriving an already underfunded service of more money? And no money in the world is going to help heal my heart. When I got pregnant again though the hospital promised a dramatically different care plan. Your trust will probably also have a similar high risk care plan for women who had traumatic births. That might help your objective more... getting more one to one care and being listened to etc.

Sometimes it feels like the NHS is some holy grail here that can’t even be criticised. But they fuck up. And they fuck up usuallt because of being completely overworked and understaffed.

Hope you find some resolution.
We eventually decided to scrape together the money to go private. But it’s an individual choice, and I just had ptsd flashbacks at walking back into that hospital or talking to a midwife etc... was too much for me.

bisquick

Your birth was clearly far from your imagined perfect birth, but beyond that it was all within the normal range, and all that happened to you physically was as expected when you choose to become pregnant. So not sure what you think you can sue for.

It was not ideal that you were on your own for a time, but midwifes as with any HCP have to look at things from the perspective of what is average otherwise they would never get anything achieved, and you progressed from 3cm faster than the average women, if every women at 3cm saying she was in pain was given a bed on a labour ward the system would completely fail, and then there would be genuine birthing catastrophes.

Have you tried to access counseling (via GP) to discuss your ongoing distress, I feel that would be a better use of energy if you hope to have another child.

The problem is that almost every woman, especially first time mums, thinks that early labour is late labour. How can we possibly know how bad it gets. So it is hard for a midwife to judge whether someone is in early or late Labour other than by cervix dilation. For the OP, she was presenting fully as early labour, with 6mins between contractions, and her interpretation of the pain would only be relevant if the hospital could take in all the women from the moment their contractions seem to start (this would have to include all the false labours and 3-4 day labours etc). But that is simply not possible.

I think she was both lucky and unlucky with her fast birth. Most of us have damage from every kind if birth. I've damage from 3 very very different births, one a rapid one like OPs. Luckily they put me on the prelabour ward with that one as I lived quite far away and my contractions were 3 mins apart despite being only 2-3 cm. But on the prelabour ward we were left alone, no monitoring of baby, no midwife hands on, no offer of pain relief till I really ramped up and begged for it. Midwife had to judge my stage again based on how many cm and probably my demeanour. That would be standard practice. But that was my best labour because it progressed quickly and although the speed caused damage, I know that I had just as much if not more damage, plus days of agony on my first labour as well as intervention.

I think the OPs expectations are partly the problem as the hospitals actions don't seem to have been anything but standard practice in relation to how she was presenting but she hung around rather than going home as requested, got distressed by the lack of care (when she should have been home) and then had the unexpected situation of a fast 2nd stage which makes her feel justified to be upset and angry but nobody, including herself, could have known she'd progress so fast.

It's a really difficult one as nobody likes to see a new mum devastated and traumatised by her experience but maybe going through her notes with someone who can explain why she wasn't helped more when she was presenting as early labour might help.

I think some posters feel that the AIBU forum is an acceptable place to be rude to the OP. In this case, the OP experienced, to her, a traumatic birth experience and feels aggrieved over not being listened to, believed and treated seriously. Moreover, one(wo)manupship is really unhelpful to the OP I would think. It probably is unreasonable of the OP to sue but absolutely not unreasonable to take some form of action to address her fear of birthing again, how she was treated and how she feels about herself physically. On the latter, yes, vaginas and vulvas get a battering through birth but it doesn't mean we should accept damage and injury where it affects physical functionality or mental health.

OP, some NHS trusts offer an 'afterthoughts' service which effectively allows you to debrief your experience and talk it through. Also, look to see your GP about your injured labia. You might also wish to talk to a doula about your fears for the future and what could be done to address them. Also, sadly, many midwives take experienced birthers more seriously so you might have a better experience than last time.