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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Hospital food

166 replies

Afternooncatnap · 02/11/2017 17:07

So my 9 month old is in hospital with bronchiolitis. I have to stay in here with him.

the hospital don't provide his milk and won't let me make up formula. So I'm buying really expensive ready made milk. They also don't provide baby food and don't want me bringing home made. So I'm also buying jars of food for him.

They don't feed me and there is only sandwich places at the hospital so I have been buying expensive microwave meals for me.

So including parking it's costing a small fortune to be here.

I just found out that if I was breastfeeding (somthing I was unable to do) they would feed me.

I now just feel a but hacked off that it's costing me so much to be here when there are other parents that are in the same position getting either themselves or there baby fed by the hospital.

AIBU to think that as a children's hospital they should provide baby food, and to feel that they should feed all mums. We all need energy to look after our babies, breastfeeding or not. It's not like I can just not eat because my son is on formula.

OP posts:
Toddlerteaplease · 02/11/2017 18:00

We did only used to feed breastfeeding mums but it was discriminatory to bottle feeding ones so both now get fed.

ElizabethShaw · 02/11/2017 18:07

What kind of food is on offer? Surely toast, cereal, yogurt, fruit, soup, pasta dishes, fish fingers etc are all suitable?

Floralnomad · 02/11/2017 18:08

I was in hospital recently - be grateful they are not feeding you it was dire ! I suppose the theory is you could get someone to come in whilst you go home / out to eat . The formula thing sounds bizarre . Could you order a pizza or takeaway to be delivered to the ward or even the main entrance that you could pop out and collect . Hope baby gets well soon and you escape .

2014newme · 02/11/2017 18:09

So of you nipped home would they not feed your child,?
I can't believe that they starve children in hospital or expect you to provide their meals with no cooking facilities, sorry.

CrochetBelle · 02/11/2017 18:13

What kind of food is on offer that a jar of baby food is more suitable?

ZoopDragon · 02/11/2017 18:15

Sorry your son is ill. I hope he gets better soon Flowers

Why won't they let you bring homemade food in? Could a family member/friend pop to Asda or somewhere and get you some cheaper babyfood and readymeals/sandwiches?

I think they feed bf mums because they can't be away from baby for long, whereas a HCP could give a ff baby a bottle if needed. Her milk supply will be affect she doesn't eat and drink enough.

At the end of the day, the NHS is under huge financial strain so it's understandable they don't provide formula or baby food or feed relatives unless absolutely necessary.

2014newme · 02/11/2017 18:17

@Zoopdragon I don't agree! The baby is the patient so should have food and milk provided surely. If mum went home he'd starve would he? That's crazy.

Hauntedlobster · 02/11/2017 18:20

Zoop RTFT - the BF/FF thing has been explained by several posters

oldlaundbooth · 02/11/2017 18:20

I'd be pissed too.

But we need NHS cuts, right?

expatinscotland · 02/11/2017 18:23

This paradigm that everyone has a 'friend or family member' who can 'nip to ASDA' and bring you food really can't die out soon enough, especially because so many children's hospitals are now centralised and often quite far from the patient's home. The nearest one to us is 2 hours away and that's the norm for people here. Even for those in some cities, certain treatments can only be done in Glasgow, so everyone, from all over this vast country, has to go there with their child if there is some form of treatment that has to be had there. And yes, often Ronald Macdonald House and CLIC house are full and have waiting lists.

Yet there's still 'can someone bring you food'? Yeah, everyone I know is two hours away in winter weather when it's not possible to reach here (patients are often brought in by chopper), let me just magic some up.

GardeningWithDynamite · 02/11/2017 18:24

What I don't understand is why, if they're making a load of food anyway, they can't sell some to people like the OP, who is stuck there?
Presumably, that would make them some money, save a load of money for parents who are caring for children in hospital and mean that everyone got something a bit better than takeaways and bought sandwiches.

MsPassepartout · 02/11/2017 18:24

They should definitely be providing formula for your baby because he’s a patient.

DS1 was in SCBU for a few weeks as a newborn, and any baby in SCBU who was formula fed got the formula provided by the hospital, as they were a patient in there for medical reasons. The nurses said it was the same policy on the paediatric ward, hospital providing formula to sick formula fed babies.

I’d be complaining about that, and the lack of hospital food your baby can eat, rather than the lack of food for parents. And as pp have said, feeding breastfeeding mums is more about making sure they keep producing breastmilk for their baby, rather than them not being able to leave the baby for long enough to pop out for a sandwich.

Ttbb · 02/11/2017 18:25

YABVU! Just imagine how much the treatment actually costs. It's ridiculous to start not picking over baby food and microwave meals when you are accepting thousands of pounds worth of treatment for free effectively. -Before you start talking about all the tax you pay do you actually pay enough to cover the cost of the treatment? Don't forget all the extra stuff like the cost of you safety ensured by the police/army, cost of schooling for any children you may have in school, child benefits, etc. When you really think about it you are very lucky. If you lived in a different country where the state doesn't pay for healthcare your DC may already be dead.

Cookiesandcake · 02/11/2017 18:29

At our local hospital they feed breastfeeding mums but not formula feeding. They provide milk for ff babies as they're required to feed the patient. I thought that was standard procedure

Athome77 · 02/11/2017 18:35

When my youngest was in hospital (10 months old for 2 weeks) they said I could have his meal as I was providing his milk and jar food (they didn’t have any pureed food (I was just like what do you feed people who are on a soft diet but apparently that’s different cause of salt content etc). He is 10 now so it was awhile ago.

We also got a parking pass it was a reduced rate for a week, I think it was £5. They still do a similar thing at the hospital.

2014newme · 02/11/2017 18:36

My babies were in nicu we were given loads of those little ready made bottles plus I took some home

AJPTaylor · 02/11/2017 18:36

well if you could order off the kids menu but dont think your dc will eat it, order it anyway and eat it behind the curtain.

calamityjam · 02/11/2017 18:38

I shouldn't really admit this but I was so hungry when in hospital with ds that I stole a bacon sandwich from the canteen. I had been there 2 days and brought £20 with me as it was an emergency admission. £10 went on petrol and the rest on parking. The hospital was a 3 hour round trip and nobody came to see us. I was absolutely starving and didn't know what else to do. We had spent 11 hours on a chair in a&e with ds wrapped in my coat as they had no blankets and it was freezing.

Ceebs85 · 02/11/2017 18:38

You have my sympathies OP. I spent 3 nights in hospital when my daughter was 5 weeks old. I'd had to give up bf at 3 weeks and was feeling incredibly guilty and emotional about it. On admission I wasn't told I wouldnt be fed so mealtime came and went and I assumed I'd just been forgotten about. When I asked someone about it they asked if i was bf, it felt like kicking a woman when she's down to be told no meals because i wasnt bf.

On the plus side there was a milk kitchen on each wing and different types/brands of milk provided with a polite sign asking that parents bring in their own asap but are welcome to use stock until then.

I can sort of understand not feeding ff mums given that the mum isnt the patient but not having appropriate facilities to feed baby is something I would speak to PALS about.

Dutch1e · 02/11/2017 18:40

I find these threads so depressing.

I live in Holland and had to stay in hospital with my 21-year old (unavoidable, not a whim).

She was fed and so was I, no quibbling.

The idea that a woman has to leave her baby in hospital to get something as fundamental as food breaks my heart

Ceebs85 · 02/11/2017 18:40

@calamityjam

That breaks my heart Flowers

arethereanyleftatall · 02/11/2017 18:42

So, according to your 2nd post op, your baby could be being fed as he's eligible for the meals, but you are choosing to give him jars instead?

user1485196412 · 02/11/2017 18:44

Argh sounds horrible! Being in hospital is bad enough without all that as well. I'm surprised they don't give formula though- in my experience they've always given formula? Maybe they've stopped doing that. If it's a common formula ask if they can give it to you as they usually have aptamil, SMA etc but not the less common ones e.g. hipp

Helpme02 · 02/11/2017 18:44

I have never ever heard of any hospital and we have been in a fair few not allow you to make up bottles. There is normally a kitchen ( never been to a ward where there isn't access to a kettle )
They wouldn't begrudge that all.

I was in hospital for 20 months with my DD and in every month since ... I never get fed because I am not breast feeding so that is the same everywhere.

DJBaggySmalls · 02/11/2017 18:46

When DS was in for a month, they a) required a parent to be with them most of the time and b) wouldnt feed us. We got a voucher for a sandwich a day from a machine.
They didnt have enough staff. The ward manager was never there.
Of course hospitals should be able to feed patients and carers. and they should have an affordable canteen.
If people cant get to the canteen they should deliver to the ward.

2 people die of hunger or thirst every day in an NHS hospital or care home. We can afford to do better than this.

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