Tattoos

[DaisyRaine90]

DP doesn’t want me to get any more (I have 3 In discreet places)

I want a cuff tattoo to cover self harm scars and a Phoenix to symbolise me rising from the ashes on my back.

Would I be U to get them done anyway even though he doesn’t want me to?

And AIBU to have one in a visible place (cuff)
Would it be better to have a tattoo or self harm scars on show?

I might enter a social work or academic profession and would like to run a shop one day. Would a tattoo hold me back at all or are we in a modern era?

I already had the tattoos before we met (and the two planned which I wanted)

Do you have tattoos? Do you regret them? Has it affected your work in anyway?

Thanks 😊

[MissRabbitNeedsaSpaDay]

Go for it! I have a sleeve & work as a therapist. It’s never held me back at all. Long sleeves can cover a cuff anyway

[healzam]

Bit judgy saying she lacks direction because she used the wording might.

[Ollivander84]

I have a lot but all covered easily. 2 x thigh, 2 x back, 2 x stomach, 2 x ankle and one inner wrist tattoo. Plus my eyebrows

[TheHeraldOfAndraste]

Weren't HQ discussing making a tattoo and piercings/modification board?

[Tabsicle]

I have a lot of tattoos. If they can't be covered - might be an issue for jobs. But in most offices the cover up is an option.

[whiteroseredrose]

There was a thread on here a while ago where someone asked for actual recruiters, not HR, to say whether they'd choose a non-tattooed candidate over a tattooed one. I think overwhelming the answer was yes.

[DaisyRaine90]

*Goshthatwentwell
*
If only you could snap your fingers and get the career you want, eh? I’m studying at the moment and can’t exactly speed that process up.

As for being “well enough” the Phoenix is to symbolise rising from the ashes. As in, survival. I may not be at the end of the road (who is?) but I’ve certainly survived a lot of fire.

[DaisyRaine90]

*Healzam
*
Thank you

I always say “might” because life has a funny way of changing even the most rigid of plans

[DaisyRaine90]

Sn0tnose

I’ve had ribs and inside of my ankle and foot done so sure it won’t be much worse than that.

I have a high pain threshold and may take a Valium or two first 😹

[AdalindSchade]

You can be a social worker with visible tattoos. I work with a woman with (small) facial tattoos and lots of other visible ones on her arms and hands.

[DaisyRaine90]

I never said DP was averted.
His only concern is that it will affect my work really (and possibly single me out a bit at the prep school gates 🙄)

I’m having the Phoenix but going to consider the cuff further.

Any ideas of good cover up makeup? X

[DaisyRaine90]

He has one tattoo you can’t see dressed 😊

[RebelRogue]

Wrist is quite painful.. plus the tremors. But that might just be me.

[Voice0fReason]

I really don't like tattoos. I can understand using them to cover scars but I have yet to see one that I think looks better than undecorated skin.
I don't think they age well either. I know loads of people who have changed them years later because they no longer like the original design. They also fade and look tired.
If my DH got one knowing how I feel about them, I would be very upset. He would have every right to, it's his body, I don't own him, but it would affect how I felt about him.

It will make a negative impression on some employers - that's inevitable, but it really depends how obvious it is.

[ContessaBonessa]

They don't age well at all. They turn into a blur.

[whyioughtta]

My best friend covered self-harm scars on her wrist & arm with the most beautiful rose tattoo. She loves them & gets lots of compliments. We talked about it at length before she went ahead & now she def feels pleased & more confident.

I have arm & wrist tattoos too. I hid them for years, always wearing long sleeves for work. I am successful & have a great job in senior management so always thought I'd be judged for them. I was right! My boss of 5 years once said (despite having tattoos himself) "I wouldn't hire wally with tattoos all over his arms as shoes they've no idea about professionalism" - from that day forward I've never hidden them from him or anyone else. What an idiot!

I think from our experiences, (relationship aside) get them but plan for how you might hide them if you wanted to (job interviews rather than jobs is reasonable).

[speakout]

My friend owns a large recruitment agency.
They will drop any candidates that have visible tattoos.

[JacquesHammer]

My friend owns a large recruitment agency.
They will drop any candidates that have visible tattoos

What a shame your friend isn't doing right by employers she serves and potential candidates. How do employers feel that she's potentially losing them the best person for the job without even allowing them to apply?

[speakout]

JacquesHammer my friend is simply responding to client demand.

He is in the business of making money,

If candidates with tattoos make money for him he would have no hesitation in dealing with them.

But they don't.

[Kathsmum]

Lots of work places still say no visible tattoos. Right it wrong, their rules.

[JacquesHammer]

But they don't

But that's a nonsensical sweeping statement.

I've had countless visible tattoos since I was 18, been through temping with agencies, working for a law firm, head hunted to another, then opening my own business. Worked in several different industries. Never had the slightest issue.

In fact I can't remember the last time I worked with someone who doesn't have tattoos

[Bruceishavingfish]

But they don't

They dont because he writes them off for having tattoos. Having tattoos does not impact you ability to be good at your job.

Your friend is being a dick. No one demands 'no visible' tattoos anymore. A company that does is very behind on the times and missing out.

[Albadross]

"There are many situations where tattoos are not presentable for example in a professional situation"

^ "^tattoos show either a lack of judgment (not forseeing that they might hold you back) or a lack of self confidence (never expecting to find yourself in an environment where it would matter). "

"Self harm scars on the other hand just reveal past struggles with mental health (sonething that is widely accepted and respected these days)."

I think many on this thread have clearly shown that the first statement isn't true. The second may be true but frankly there are many unspoken rules that should be challenged, the same as we challenge people's assumptions on the basis of a disability. With the push towards a better work/life balance so employers no longer have to pick up the tab for mental ill health people shouldn't be expected to base all decisions around work. Those of us who do have visible tattoos and are in highly corporate industries are reminding employers that it's our work they should be judging us on, not our bodies. If you're clearly professional and in clean smart clothes then a tattoo is not suggestive of some deep character flaw.

And on the last point, mental health certainly isn't widely accepted yet even in organisations that are leading the way, in fact it's judged far more harshly that tattoos are, so that's just not true.

[DunkMeInTomatoSoup]

They dont because he writes them off for having tattoos. Having tattoos does not impact you ability to be good at your job. Your friend is being a dick. No one demands 'no visible' tattoos anymore. A company that does is very behind on the times and missing out.

Bull. I've worked in premium public sector jobs all my life and I wouldn’t have had those if I was covered in scribbles and stapled together. I might just pop into Coutts on the Strand at lunch time and see how many of their staff have LOVE and HATE across their knuckles, 3 inch spacers in lobes and a bright blue Mohawk. But then of course the clientele, even if covered in such garb do not expect their millions to be services by similar. Hence they don't bank at Nat West, Broadwater Farm.

If you want tattoos, fine, but don’t expect all doors to be open for you. Ditto, if you don't have tattoos I wouldn’t expect a tattoo parlour to employ you either.

And I've just double checked, the police across the UK forces cannot have visible tattoos on face, neck, hands and should wear long sleeves to cover arm tattoos. The army has only just lifted its visible tattoo ban. And you can bet your bottom dollar anyone with their name daubed below their ear won’t be selected for ceremonial duties. Last published figures i found:

But in 2013-14, the Army rejected 336 applications because of offensive or inappropriately placed tattoos, a Freedom of Information request showed.

The Army's website currently says that if a tattoo is "offensive, obscene or racist it will prevent you from joining the Army".

[IdentityRequest1]

The reality with employers is some will mind, some will not. The fields you mention, I'd imagine not.
With a cuff I wouldn't give it a second thought anyway because you can put a long sleeved top on for interviews etc., should you feel the need.
I think your ideas sound lovely.