Names

[user1483390742]

I have a 3 year old son called Zachary. My SIL has just had a baby boy and called him Zak. Same surname. I am LIVID! AIBU?

YA BOO.

Mebbes she's like the name for a long time?

She looks like the one with no imagination. ...
Lovely name!!

Did you know you've copied 1483390741 people's user names though? Sorry couldn't resist!

Yeah that is a bit odd for cousins to have the same name.

Strange thing to be livid about. Take it as a compliment.

It's a great name.

I would be furious!!! My SIL used the name I was going to use if I had a girl. I had a boys so didn’t use it but I was so incredibly hurt. At hat point we were going to have another child and I would loved to have used it if the baby was a girl.

Not sure if YABU (although I probably understand your irritation)but two of my cousins have the same name (which is also my dad's name) and I never really thought it was odd (until I came on here!). I dont think it really bothers either of them either

One of my first cousins and I have the same first name. It's really not that unusual and your SIL may have liked the name for a long time or it could be a family name on her side of the family. Get over it!

YABU.
I know plenty of families where close relatives have the same or similar names, including surname.

I couldn't care less if someone had done the same to me. Eg. if my DH and I had named our son David and then his brother called his son Dave.

YABU

YABU it doesn’t lessen your son’s name or deprive you of something.

Why does it upset you so much ? It's not that big a deal - my cousin has the same name as my brother - Auntie asked my Mum if she minded, Mum said no of course not. If you really like a name, and you've always wanted to use it for your child, no reason you should have to give it up because a family member has got in first.

Do you intend to call your son Zak for short? - If not, even less of a problem - different name.

Sorry OP, YAB a bit U. No one owns a name. Maybe they ‘had’ it set in stone before your Zachary was even born and she was annoyed when you used it?

I get why the first reaction would be anger though. I worry you might get a pasting on here so gird your loins!

Your ds is Zachary and her ds is Zac, so Its still in everyday use (at least) a different name.
I've got my little boys name picked out and even if my ds has another boy and uses it, which I doubt as it's not her style. I'd still use it. Perhaps your sil is the same.

I've got two first cousins with the same first name but a) one is more than 10 years older than the other b) my aunt asked her sister first and c) the related parents are the mother's so the 2 boys have different surnames.

In your shoes I would be a bit annoyed. There are so many names out there! I think livid is a bit OTT though.

I know nobody owns a name blah blah blah as per the MN party line and it was also historically normal for the same name to be used many times within the same family. However it isn’t now normal to do so and I think it is quite odd of your SIL.

I’d be irritated by it.

It’s weird. I’d have to say something I was pissed off when my dB uses my dds middle name for his dd born 3 weeks apart! He had known since day one I was using it, it wasn’t major but strange.

I think it’s a bit odd. It’s essentially the same name. But your son can be Zachary or zac. She doesn’t have that option.

It wouldn't bother me a huge amount in all honesty. It could be her lifelong favourite name, who knows? Either way, no, I wouldn't get particularly het up about it.

Yeah it's pretty much the same name. I think you or your DP should ask why they are giving their baby your child's name and report back here

Presumably the father had some say in it?

They're the ones who look a bit odd for making that choice

You’ll get loads of people telling you that you don’t own a name but YANBU. There are loads of lovely names to pick from, she could easily have chosen another. I’d be pissed off too

Yanbu

There are millions of other names she could have used. I'd be upset.

I understand how that would be annoying but it's not that big a deal. My cousin's son has the same name as ds1 & another cousin's grandson has the same name as ds2 & they are at the same school. My sister & a cousin almost have the same first name (think Eve/Eva).

The trouble with similar/same names is that there is a distinction and usually it is a physical characteristic big/Zak little Zak, fat Zak, ginger Zak etc, or ownership conveyed: Marys Zak, Johns Zak.

Presumably this is your DHs brothers wife? So why is no ire being targeted at him?

I'd be cross too. She obviously has no imagination.