to not want Ex to drive the DC this morning? Involves drunken injury.

[Endofmyfeckingrope]

Ex is due to pick the kids up in an hour. He was at a party at a climbing lab last night and text me this morning to say he climbed somewhere he shouldn't (more like in a state he shouldn't) fell and broke his heel. Spent the night in A+E and has a pot on.

His car is parked outside my house. He still wants to come and take the DC and the car. His argument is that because his car is automatic it's fine. He sounded really hungover on the phone.

The poor DC will have a shit weekend of doing nothing as he is in pain, in a pot and has a hangover.

I've told him he can't take them in the car? Am I right? I'd rather they stayed with me but presume that's me being unreasonable . Should I let him take them in a taxi/on the bus?

He has form for being a selfish, irresponsible wanker who takes for granted that I'll do the lion's share of the childcare, cover his weekends when he fancies a jolly etc so I'm not feeling remotely sympathetic at the moment.

Advice would really help.

There we go-compromise reached, dickhead dad admitted his dickheadishness. Kids get to see him. Result.
But the climbing wall place?! That is incredibly irresponsible, waiver or not. I think despite the waiver if there was a serious accident because someone was incapable of rational judgement, their arses would be toast. I would think their risk assessment would include such a clause.

Well done for sorting it out op .. climbing lab sound negligent. H & s still apply waiver or not . However not the issue for this thread . I think lots of people forget that op has probably dealt with similar ill thought out behaviour over and over again not one night .

As others have said, hes got an automatic so not sure why you think he cant drive if its his left heel thats broken, thats why people who as mentioned are amputees or disabled often buy automatic cars in the first place.

The poor DC will have a shit weekend of doing nothing as he is in pain, in a pot and has a hangover.

Well, children don't have to be entertained non stop, he will likely be in cast for several weeks, does that mean he cant have the children at all because he cant entertain them to your standard, it is actually ok for children to entertain themselves. If you were ill in the house would you expect the children to go to his house because the children would be bored if you were ill/injured?

The drinking is a slightly different issue, if you think he is still drunk then of course you shouldnt let your children go in the car with him however you said he spent the night in a&e so it would seem unlikely.

Glad you have sorted it out, it sounds like he has not always been reliable in the past and thats why you are perhaps reacting the way you are this time.

If the injury was the night before he still has alcohol and anesthetic in his system.
He isnt fit to drive. It isnt the same as a person who has recovered from an amputation. Its someone in pain and still under the influence.

Thanks Fuckery and Starlight .

"I think lots of people forget that op has probably dealt with similar ill thought out behaviour over and over again not one night."

This is very much the case.

I'm a boring old fart but to me it seems pretty easy to just not get so drunk that you make stupid decisions that impact your well-being on nights when you are due to have your DC the next morning. But I realise that's an unpopular opinion in our culture of alcohol abuse/binge drinking.

Baggy no anaesthetic as he didn't have any. He's awaiting a phone call to tell him whether or not he'll need surgery.

He broke his wrist a few years ago on my due date with DC2. Ended up having surgery the day before DS was born (by section) was was in a cast and pretty useless for the first few weeks of DS's life. That one was a genuine accident so I did have a modicum of sympathy though .

Good compromise OP

glad we've sorted a plan without any more fighting.

Good news :)

I can’t look after my kids properly when I’m hungover, I really can’t. So if I was not only hungover but had been up all night in A&E, plus had a hangover, PLUS probably on painkillers, PLUS had a pot on, I can’t even imagine. I wouldn’t send my kids with anyone who was hungover, and I wouldn’t get drunk the night before some kind of activity with my kids or knowing I’d be the sole caregiver. Tell him to go away and sleep it off, but of course that means that YOU are the one left taking responsibility, as is probably usual. All very irresponsible and selfish of him.

half of mn is hungover
I don’t know where to start. Err no some people are responsible adults and don’t get pissed every weekend when there are Lisa to look after.
Good compromise op. Well done for holding your ground.

Excellent OP, you did good, and glad ex-H has seen that he messed up this time.

Err no some people are responsible adults and don’t get pissed every weekend when there are Lisa to look after.

Most MNers don't have a Lisa to look after though.

should I have a Lisa? No one told me!

Is Lisa the goat? 😂

For goodness sake will no-one think of poor Lisa!!!