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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Pyjamas at hotel breakfast

607 replies

flyingpigsinclover · 23/10/2017 10:22

We were staying overnight in a hotel last night (after a small domestic emergency so had left the house in a hurry), over breakfast this morning a family of five came down for breakfast with all the children in pyjamas and dressing gowns and barefoot. they were aged about eight to fifteen or so.

Aibu to think that this is not really acceptable?

OP posts:
tempstamos · 23/10/2017 14:54

@Bubblebubblepop

Washing, drying and dressing 4 children.
Do you have a 3 year old? A 4 year old with ASD and ADHD? Do you have an 8 year old with a skin condition? Do you have a 10 year old with thick curly hair down to her waist?
If not you don’t know what the norm is or what is necessary.
What do you suggest I do? Hmm

motherinferior · 23/10/2017 14:56

Telling someone they ‘lack respect’ for themselves and others? Bloody rude. Pyjamas and feet, ffs, not KKK outfits.

RolfNotRudolf · 23/10/2017 14:56

Tempstamos could you shift some of your routine to the previous night? My DC didn't bother with morning showers until about 10 years and prior to that they had a nightly bath. Does your DD need to wash her hair daily, and if so could it be done at night? Amd can she not do it herself?

OstentatiousWanking · 23/10/2017 14:57

"I think the fact you ask the question shows there is little point in trying to explain."

Halloween Shock How rude.

mydogisthebest · 23/10/2017 14:58

I wear pyjamas indoors as it doesn't matter if they get mucky while I am doing housework. As I sleep naked, I shower in the morning then put pyjamas on. I usually wear a clean pair every day.

I hate it though if I have to open the door to the postman or a delivery. In fact if I am expecting a delivery I often wear something like jeans and a t shirt.

One day in the summer there was a knock at the door and it was a guy asking if it was my car parked outside the house. It was and he said he had accidentally damaged it and could I come and look. I dithered on the doorstep as I had pyjamas on but did go out. The ones I had on that day didn't actually look obviously like pj's but I felt an absolute idiot and just hoped none of my neighbours saw me

silkpyjamasallday · 23/10/2017 14:59

A load of girls I was with on a school ski trip tried going down to breakfast in their pyjamas, it had been planned and discussed by all involved prior as it was supposedly very funny. On emerging in the breakfast room they got shouted at by the hotel staff who were fed up of their antics by about day 2 of the trip. They then got bollocked by the teachers too. Really funny, but for those of us with enough manners to have got dressed prior to coming down for breakfast.

It is disrespectful to wear obvious sleepwear in a public place, whether that's a hotel restaurant or Tescos and I wouldn't like seeing it where people are eating. Just a bit grubby. I am all for comfy clothing, but actual pyjamas you've worn to sleep in the night before (and for god knows how long before that) in public where people are eating in close proximity isn't on. Is it so hard to throw on leggings and a jumper?

RolfNotRudolf · 23/10/2017 15:01

I think failure to observe certain rules of etiquette does show a lack of respect for others. We live in a small crowded space and etiquette exists in part to allow us to live side by side without too much hassle. MN abounds with threads where people are worried about causing offence to others or others have caused offence to them - so etiquette clearly is important to a lot of us.

melj1213 · 23/10/2017 15:02

Oh come on, how often do you get broken glass in a hotel restaurant? And do you otherwise just stomp around merrily treading on shod feet? I think not.

I worked in a 5 star hotel in the restaurant when I was in sixth form and whilst we were hardly throwing glasses on the floor, things would regularly get knocked off tables or dropped from trays and whilst we'd immediately get the mess cleared up, we couldn't guarantee that there wasn't the odd tiny sliver of glass that would do no harm to a shod foot if it was stood on, but could cause pain to someone barefoot that stood on it.

Also I tended not to stand on peoples' feet but if there's a buffet part to the breakfast then at busy periods it was not unusual for the occasional toe to get stood on by guests not noticing others having stopped/not moved. And it's not just people standing on feet that needs to be considered - if heavier items are dropped/knocked off a table and it lands on your foot then it is always going to hurt, but dropping a plate onto a shod foot is going to hurt less than it landing directly on a bare foot. And then of course there's simple things like stubbing your toe on a table/chair leg which won't happen if you're wearing shoes and hurts like hell when you're not

And then there's the other safety aspects as it's not just about glass on the floor but also things like spilled food/drinks - again if there's a buffet table then it is not unusual for there to be the odd liquid spill, bits of fruit or crumbs on the floor that the staff haven't had chance to clear up before the barefoot person walks through them - or if there are hot food/drinks there's always the possibility of some getting spilled or dropped and if you're barefoot then you're more likely to get scalded.

tempstamos · 23/10/2017 15:02

@RolfNotRudolf
Thank-you.
We used to do two at night but that isn’t actually saving time, just rearranging it, plus it actually flows better doing them all in the morning and seems to take less time.
DD’s hair isn’t washed everyday with shampoo but it does need to be conditioned and made wet most days or her curls will be untameable and her hair will be really dry. She does the washing, I just help her comb through and make sure everything is rinsed out and it’s easier for me to dry it because she has so much.

LassWiTheDelicateAir · 23/10/2017 15:03

I think the fact you ask the question shows there is little point in trying to explain."

 How rude

Bit like thinking it is fine to turn up in a hotel dining room in pyjamas and bare feet then?

If anyone can't see what is wrong with that I doubt having it explained will help. It requires a massive lack of consideration for others to think it is ok.

Lethaldrizzle · 23/10/2017 15:04

Temps I still don't understand why I hey can't get dressed for breakfast. Why not wash hair less for example

motherinferior · 23/10/2017 15:05

Yes, and I can assure you that when one walks around barefoot one looks out for these unexpected multiple hazards.

MN is extraordinarily uptight these days. Feet, piercings, pyjamas, loud political views...all to be subdued and rendered acceptably sedate.

LassWiTheDelicateAir · 23/10/2017 15:06

No, I don’t think sheer longevity gives you the right to be rude to other people

The 98 year old wasn't the one being rude.

Dusktilldawn · 23/10/2017 15:06

Disgusting and slovenly. Some people are really smelly in the morning.

MaisyPops · 23/10/2017 15:08

If anyone can't see what is wrong with that I doubt having it explained will help.
Agree with you on that one.

upperlimit · 23/10/2017 15:09

MN abounds with threads where people are worried about causing offence to others or others have caused offence to them - so etiquette clearly is important to a lot of us.

You can hardly apply the petty and righteous tone of aibu and apply it to the general population.

Bubblebubblepop · 23/10/2017 15:09

@tempstamos I'm not suggesting you do anything- I'm saying it's not the norm.

Other people don't spend all that time getting their kids ready, you do and that's fine.
But to suggest people can't make breakfast time in a hotel because they need 2 hours to get washed and dressed is disingenuous.

Yes I do have a 3 year old (well 2.5) and I take her nightie off, pull her pants, leggings, socks and t shirt on, wash her face and hands and brush her teeth and hair in less than 10 Minutes every day. Bath and hairwashing is done at night. My way isn't unusual either.

bastardkitty · 23/10/2017 15:09

It's really inappropriate.

motherinferior · 23/10/2017 15:10

The question I asked was not about pyjamas (though no, personally I don’t care if other people come down to a hotel breakfast in pyjamas). It was about feet.

Feet are fine, IMO.

tempstamos · 23/10/2017 15:11

@Lethaldrizzle

I have two toddlers, one with autism.
They are hungry when they wake up, so they eat when they wake up. They are washed everyday so that they are clean. We don’t stay in hotels that often and usually have room service if we do. But if we went down for breakfast I would be bringing them down in their Pyjamas and then washing and dressing them after they have eaten.

motherinferior · 23/10/2017 15:12

I haven’t heard the word etiquette in decades outside MN and a few jokes.

Iamagreyhoundhearmeroar · 23/10/2017 15:14

Feet are fine for you, motherinferior. It doesn't follow that nobody else should find other people's smelly trotters offensive when they're eating.

MeT00 · 23/10/2017 15:16

It's common and tacky. Some people have no standards though.

OstentatiousWanking · 23/10/2017 15:16

OP said she was put up in the hotel due to a small kitchen fire. It would seem reasonable to think the pj wearing family were in a similar situation.

This thread is batshit.

motherinferior · 23/10/2017 15:17

So what do you do about feet whose scandalous nakedness are skimpily masked by flipflops (they don’t call them thongs for nothing, you know) or even posh strappy sandals?

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