AIBU to stab his dirty balls?

[4teensandababy]

Last night I swept and mopped the kitchen floor. It was sparkling.
I come downstairs this morning to DH (football coach) and 30+ incredibly dirty balls spread across the kitchen floor whilst he's pumping them up.
WIBU to stab his dirty balls with a sharp implement?

Yanbu at all.

This thread is totally not what I thought it’d be

Yanbu! He needs to get the flor back to the sparkling condition it was in before too.

Just tell him to mop the floor again.

No - houses are for living in! It's just mud.

I thought this was going to be a thread about cheating

YANBU

YANBU! He had better mop and do a good job or it would be sub zero at ours!

Do it!

Hand him the mop

Sorry all about the misleading title. Thought I'd inject some humour into a Monday morning!
Balls now gone and have handed him the mop and bucket

I winced and last time I checked I don't even have balls!

Did he really have to be handed the mop and bucket? Could he not see the mess he made?

Brilliant thread OP.... Just what is needed on a wet mardy Monday, given me a good chuckle!

Excellent thread title! I totally got sucked in and thought it was going to be about cheating!

Yanbu, though. What sort of implement are we thinking here?

For a minute I thought you were Britain's answer to Mrs Bobbitt!

Stab away, my dear, stab away.

This actually did make me laugh out loud.

YANBU OP

I think this is my most favourite thread title yet

The topic doesn’t even come close to what I was imagining

Stab away. Then make him clean up. That made me laugh.

😂😂😂

Happens here all the bloody time! Plus the sodding dirty football boots!

You know what gets me Parques?

They can walk through leaving a trail of mud, leaves, twig and slugs etc, and then when you point it out to them - deny it. "It wasn't me!" (in an outraged tone)

"You have still got the boots on! You are standing at the end of a trail of filth! Your boots are still shedding clarts everywhere!"

"It wasn't me! I get the blame for everything in this house!"

It made me smile too 🙊

Best thread title ever award goes to 4teensandababy

Stab those balls.

SchadenfreudePersonified Ha! that sounds like a sound recording at my house! My DH tracked in fox poo once and he walked all over the house in boots covered in the stuff. I come home, open the door to a whaff of smell, brown poo boot prints everywhere upstairs, everywhere downstairs, him STILL wearing said boots which are STILL covered in poo. I say 'WTH!!' and he says 'What?' ...Really?? You can't see or smell what you've done??

Handed him the mop, told him to clean it all up. I can sympathise OP!!

Thanks guys, I'm pleased to say all but 1 ball survived (wasn't me honest), floor is back to its sparkling state, and DH has learnt his lesson!

Schaden & Parques That is exactly what it's like in our house!