AIBU to stab his dirty balls?

[4teensandababy]

Last night I swept and mopped the kitchen floor. It was sparkling.
I come downstairs this morning to DH (football coach) and 30+ incredibly dirty balls spread across the kitchen floor whilst he's pumping them up.
WIBU to stab his dirty balls with a sharp implement?

Another sucked in by the title - I was expecting balls crawling with crabs!? I need to remove myself from MN and clean my brain with bleach

Schaden love the word clarts, are you from the NE? DH uses that word and I'd never come across it until I met him.

Glad the floor is clean again, but what about the balls themselves? Maybe your DH should try this (hope the link works).

CardsforKittens Love that!! Bloody hilarious!

I am gramgram - it's one of the best owes ever!

*words, not owes

I'm sorry I'm going to get flamed for this but I find the title really gross. Imagine if a man had written 'to stab her dirty flaps' - just no!

Well lethal what would that be referring to?

Well @Lethaldrizzle you clearly haven’t read the thread because flaps aren’t the equivalent at all. A husband could threaten to let down all his wife’s footballs if he so wished!!

Excellent clickbait! A
(Don't know that I'd actually stab them but I'd certainly heave all the inflated balls out the back door -- and hope it's blowing a gale)

Haha you're right I really hadn't read the thread properly. Bad habit. Now I get it.

I opened the thread cautiously - thought he might have had some gross personal hygiene problem.

Yes, absolutely you should do something to his balls. Leave the footballs alone though, it's not fair on the kids who will be wanting to use them.