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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to dread the staff Christmas do?

102 replies

ProperLavs · 23/10/2017 08:19

Does anybody else avoid theirs?
I am seriously considering just not going.
A trip down the local would suit me fine.

OP posts:
OccasionalNachos · 23/10/2017 08:22

You don’t have to go! I don’t like ours if we go for a meal/drinks. Sometimes we just hang out in the office with party food, which is much nicer.

Kintan · 23/10/2017 08:23

What are you dreading about it? Is it the people or the venue? I don’t mind my work’s Xmas thing as I genuinely like my colleagues, it’s usually low key drinks in the office with a pub trip for those who want to make a longer night of it, but I’d struggle if it was something more formal with people I wasn’t too fond of!

ShirleyPhallus · 23/10/2017 08:24

I say no. I am perfectly cheerily bad tempered about it but just say I don't want to go - too many client Christmas parties I have to attend, I'll always say no to the optional ones

DrinkReprehensibly · 23/10/2017 08:26

YANBU! Ours is fancy dress!

MrsOverTheRoad · 23/10/2017 08:28

Don't go if it's awful!

They're meant to be fun but if yours isn't, don't attend! Seriously....life's too short OP. It's not mandatory.

Come down with something if you need to but don't make yourself.

OuchBollocks · 23/10/2017 08:28

Not been to one in years but most of my colleagues are mardy fuckers. So sad I don't have childcare Grin

WatchingFromTheWings · 23/10/2017 08:31

Love my works xmas do! I rarely go out so spend ages looking forward to it. Already looking at dresses.... 🎄

BigSandyBalls2015 · 23/10/2017 08:31

They're usually painful unless you're lucky enough to have fab colleagues. I choose to socialise with about three of mine, out of a potential 200+.

Last year I was stuck between Barry and Janet, losing the will to live ...... had to ask the waitress to leave the bottle of red right by me, rather than keep topping up and taking it away.

N0tNowBernard · 23/10/2017 08:32

I didn't go to all of mine. You could always conveniently be ill around that time...

Ifailed · 23/10/2017 08:33

I always dodged out of any 'compulsory fun' and would arrange something like a trip to the local with people I liked, could you not do the same OP?

chickenowner · 23/10/2017 08:34

I never go to them.

I really like my colleagues but just find the enforced socializing and having fun too forced to enjoy myself and I just end up feeling awkward.

I always make up a previous engagement.

Original poster
ProperLavs · 23/10/2017 08:35

It's the venue. It used to be local and now is in the next town. I also know it involves a lot of drinking and loud noise. It's quite awkward for me to get back from as well, unless I drive and then won't be able to drink.

I do really like a lot of my colleagues and would like to be able to chat with them away from work ( school), but it will be a major piss up- I've seen FB photos from last year and I find that completely overwhelming.
I get socially very overwhelmed in large crowds.

In the past I would have worried that I would need to network and would have force myself to go, but now. I can't do it.

OP posts:
smartiecake · 23/10/2017 08:35

I'm not going on mine. I like my colleagues but we pay for our own ticket to a meal/dance etc and it's too much money -£50 plus outfit and taxi. I would rather spend that on something else.
Just don't go! It's not compulsory do something else

GeekyWombat · 23/10/2017 08:35

Ours is always on a chuffing boat so you can’t get away.

treaclesoda · 23/10/2017 08:36

Just don't go. Anywhere I've ever worked there have been plenty of people who don't and no one thinks any of it Smile

Rheged · 23/10/2017 08:37

I’m not going to mine this year. I like my colleagues well enough and we get on - but they are not my friends. Last year it wasn’t awful or anything but it was expensive for what it was (I work in the public sector so we always pay for our own) and it was all a bit awkward.

CigarsofthePharoahs · 23/10/2017 08:37

I did go to a few in my old job. I didn't mind if it was a meal in a restaurant, but I didn't bother with the ones that were just going out clubbing.
One I wish I had dodged was a "shared" do with about 10 other groups. Food was terrible, DJ was terrible and we all were playing the game of not being the one sat next to the deputy manager. I was never given a hard time for not going.

Original poster
ProperLavs · 23/10/2017 08:37

I think I will ask if anyone wants a drink locally too.

OP posts:
chickenowner · 23/10/2017 08:37

I'm also a teacher!

You don't need to go. I don't really think that networking is that important in our profession so don't worry about that.

NotAgainYoda · 23/10/2017 08:38

You have something else on that evening Smile

School involves a lot of noise and speaking to people. If that's not what you want in your spare time, you don't have to go

chickenowner · 23/10/2017 08:38

Ours is always on a chuffing boat so you can’t get away.

I had a few of those when I worked overseas - I hate not being able to leave when I want to!

Ceto · 23/10/2017 08:39

Just invent an important reason why you can't go, or throw a sickie.

TheFirstMrsDV · 23/10/2017 08:40

I never go.
I don't like going out for meals. I find sitting down for hours around a massive table uncomfortable. The vegetarian option is always rubbish.
I can't afford it and I hate going out to something I wouldn't chose with people who earn double what I do who are not worrying about the price of a cab home.

So I don't go. They wanted our deposit in August.

DancesWithOtters · 23/10/2017 08:40

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Slartybartfast · 23/10/2017 08:40

i have thrown a sickie, they intentionallly made the meal on a day i work so i had no choice