to dread the staff Christmas do?

[ProperLavs]

Does anybody else avoid theirs?
I am seriously considering just not going.
A trip down the local would suit me fine.

I've missed quite a few as I've been on maternity leave for 2 of them and heavily pregnant for another 2 (including this years one)

I wouldn't go anyway as the last few years they have done a massive very formal and posh corporate event = Black tie / ballgown. That isn't my thing at all so I've made my excuses (helps that I'll be 7.5m pregnant this year). Although my company are good about not pressuring people to attend.

We'll do a department thing in the new year.

In 40 years of working I think I have been to maybe 6 Christmas do's. A couple I have enjoyed - very small team and people I got on well with just having a nice meal.

The large ones are awful. I went to one and just felt so out of it. Almost all of them got drunk (I don't really drink which most of them found hilarious!). A lot made real fools of themselves, one threw up on the dance floor, one female hit another female, males and females sneaking off to find somewhere to have sex (came across one couple in a car as I left).

I worked for that company for almost 10 years and after the first one I just said no to all the others. I did get a lot of stick about it with people saying I was a misery, spoilsport etc but I just ignored them. Each year when I heard the stories of what had happened (with everyone that went think they were so hilarious) I was relieved I had not gone

I hate ours, I like my colleagues but don't have much in common. We have 2, one in work time, which we have to attend (or take annual leave) and one it of work, which I fein an excuse for!

*one out of work time.

I'm not going to mine, I'm just going to say it clashes with my DH's Xmas lunch. I have to pay for mine, too, whereas he doesn't, so it makes sense for him to go to his.

Except that the date for his has changed, so it doesn't clash anymore. But work don't know that.

I'm toying with making an excuse this year. The last work party I went to (a leaving do) a few awkward people got ridiculously drunk and started arguing meaning the atmosphere was awful. I like the majority of my work colleagues but sadly there's a few who are 'difficult' and the intake of alcohol makes them doubly so. Plus the managers usually make an effort to come to the Christmas party, which whilst good of them, does change the atmosphere a bit as everyone doesn't really relax in the same way. Plus it's normally nowhere near where I live so I'm stuck with either spending ages on public transport in the freezing cold to get there and back, or driving and not drinking. If you do the latter then as soon as others know this the 'oh, can I grab a lift if you're driving' requests start and before you know it you're picking up 3 people to take to and from the party, and struggling to go home when you want to as 'Janet' who you are giving a lift to gets all 'oh come on lets not go home yet, it's still so early, let's have another drink'! Fuck you Janet Yep, I think I've talked myself out of going.

I went to the first one - but our 'girly night out' at a restaurant was gatecrashed by the boss and his 2 assistants (all men) and boss's wife (no other partners). When we complained, we were told that we had to go - to something we were paying for ourselves!

So the following year I had a previous arrangement. Saved £50+.

Looking forward to ours. We are going for a meal in a local Turkish restaurant so it will be yummy meze rather than turkey that has been dried out on the hot plate for hours on end. I also work with a group of hilarious, clever and wiry women so I always enjoy an evening in their company.

I never go to the staff christmas party. I get paid to hang out with the people I work with, I really don't want to hang out with them for free.

I'm a teacher and I find school ones the worst. You either spend the whole time talking about your classes or everyone drinks too much and behaves like teenagers. There's always some people who hook up or go home together and it's inevitably awkward at school the next day/term. That's the schools I've worked at anyway!!

I belong to a choir. I mention this regularly at work. Near Christmas we have lots of extra rehearsals cos of concerts and stuff. They really can’t be missed. At all. Oh no.

I find that there’s always an extra rehearsal on the night of the Christmas staff do. So sad. Have a wonderful time.

This has worked for me for 25+ years. (Also a teacher).

I’m not going. I made a pre-planned excuse that I would be doing something else that nice. I like the people I work with but don’t feel comfortable to go out for a meal. I do have a bit of social anxiety though.

Ours is a lunchtime meal. We are not allowed to drink.

I like most of my colleagues, but honestly, our Christmas lunch is so dull.

I have paid my share for it this year, but I am secretly planning a last minute something or other to get me out of it.

Rhonda, your post made me laugh.
Sadly I often seem to have a date clash on that night. TBF ours are usually ok; a nice dinner with good wine and a taxi home.
I quite like the people I work with but they're not my friends and I'm not mad about socialising with them, but it's frowned upon if we miss too many.

I'm not going. I hope to never go again and l have already booked annual leave for next year over the usual date.
Night out is paid by owners. Very nice meal/drinks in city centre. Then they spend all year bitching about who drank what and who ordered from the menu that has a supplement. I can't be arsed with the two faced senario as it will happen again this year.
I am in the unfortunate position of being not an owner and not in the general team -l have my own role where l attend the bosses meetings (that's how l know).

OP, I hear you. Be kind to yourself and accept that you are not going to go this year. It's nothing to do with being a misery guts, it's about who you are, and whether or not you can handle it.

I don't mind the team Christmas lunch, especially now that we've made the reservation slightly later. Last year Ebeneezer Scrooge the senior manager heard that the reservation was for 1pm and announced that we'd be coming back to the office afterwards in that case, so it was promptly moved to 2pm. How miserable!

However, the afternoon of enforced fun that is put on for the whole department is awful. Christmas jumper contests, trivia quizzes, festive art projects using pipe cleaners and glittery sellotape... ugh.

I think I'll avoid this year. Last years was awful. Set meal for £19.95. Several people (I could accept one, at a push) turned up with £20, drank water and then pulled a face at being asked to leave a tip.

Now, I get Christmas is an expensive time of year, but we specifically had the conversation before booking that we could do a buffet in the office (as we have done previously) for those same people to say no, we deserved to go out and treat ourselves.

The waiting staff were lovely, btw. Earned every penny.

I hate going to mine. Years ago it was a big department wide party at a hotel paid for by the company - now it’s still paid by the company but teams organise their own meals out.

I really don’t like the “forced fun” aspect of it, I don’t like the fact I am expected to give up my own time as my team always want to go for an evening meal rather than lunchtime.

They are also big drinkers so always want to go to a bar or pub before and usually after and I don’t drink!

I have tried to get out of it loads of times but either they get offended or continuously move the sodding date to “accommodate me”.....

I've been at the same company for 16 years, haven't been to one Christmas party. Unless it's mandatory just don't go

At my dc's secondary school it is a half day on the last day of term and the staff are all forced to sit and have lunch in the school dining hall! Mind you I would much prefer that to schlepping my way to a buffet affair in a pub in the next town.
I won't go, you've all made my mind up for me, thanks!

I could cope with a pub, have a couple of drinks and a chat- that might even be ok. The staff are really nice people, but a lot of them are friendly out of work and tend to stick together at any do I have been too. I have attended all the local ones.
I am just not the sort of person that goes around wearing those strange cardboard mouth masks and post selfies on fb of it. I am not dissing them at all, I just don't get why that's funny.

I do as well. I get on really well with all my colleagues but hate the Christmas do. I end up stuck sat with all the people no one else wants to sit with as we have some 'larger' characters who rearrange the table when they turn up late. I am yet to work out the best sitting down strategy - early arrival or late!

Also I don't drink as I live 45 mins away from work and we go out locally but I then get irritated by those who are drinking and getting very loud and disturbing the others eating in the same restaurant!

I stupidly made a fuss this year about having it on one of my working days as it will be less hassle for me - should have let them book it for a non working day and said husband had his works do!!

I never used to go to them apart from the last company I worked for. It was a small firm of accountants, only 10 of us and they used to go for a lunch. I never liked the night time full company things when it was bigger companies.

I go, managers are implicitly expected to. I treat it like work, not a social, enjoyable event. ‘Unfortunately’ there is always a reason why I have to drive to avoid any dangers of drink, i’m Nice and sociable to everyone and usually need to leave by 11pm due to children etc it’s hard work, I don’t enjoy it and I swear like a trooper to my DH when I get home.