to consider our catchment school in deprived nearby town

[daisymoo2]

We live in an affluent village where our DC attend the very good state primary school but our catchment secondary school is in a very deprived nearby town. The catchment secondary school seems to be well led and is working hard at helping all children achieve despite the difficult catchment area but it's still bottom of the league tables for exam results.
DC1 is nearing secondary age. A number of DC1's friends will be going to the catchment secondary and DC1 wants to go there too. Our other option is the private school in the village where we live. We could manage this financially but wonder if it's really value for money and we don't want our DC becoming entitled brats.
AIBU considering sending our DC to the catchment school despite reservations about the peer group and exam results?
PS: We're in the country so these two schools are our only two options.

Massive generalisation for the approx 93% of people who didn't attend a private school ttbb or whatever you're called.

Private every time.

Kids need all the help they can get.

But we don't all get choice do we autumn? That's the point. Only the affluent can choose and look at the snobbish responses above - people who go to comprehensives all smoke to much and demand council houses. It would be hilarious if not so offenive.
Is that how you want your kids to turn out, OP?
People don't really want choice, they want the school closest to them to be good. Middle class people pulling their kids out of school is never going to help achieve this. Make no mistake, if there was no such thing as private education, state school would be good enough. Politicians would see to it then.

My DCs generally choose their schools and we've used a mix including private preps, village schools, state grammars, bottom of the league table inner city comps and academic private schools (older DCs trying all of the above st different points). If a school does not suit them, they can always move. All DCs have ended up with the qualifications they needed to do what they wanted to do next. School is only part of their lives. What does your DD think of the schools on offer?

Well if it’s ok to state that children at private school are “entitled brats“ is it then ok to say children at deprrived comps are chavvy delinquents?

You sound horrid OP to speak about the children attending your village school like that.

I would look at both schools with your dc in mind (and try to go in with as open a mind as possible).

But I think it's worth remembering that there will be other parents with bright dc who are extremely invested in the education of their children for whom private is simply not an option (even if they follow the mumsnet answer to all money issues and ebay/take in ironing ). They will have not choice but to attend the local comprehensive. So your children will not be alone in the comprehensive - honestly.

I would go private If you can afford it without a struggle. If not I would use the local and top up with a tutor if you need to.
I'm flabbergasted someone has left their own home to go into the world of unknowns that I call private renting willingly!! What happens if the landlord sells / wants their home back for whatever reason? Crazy!

Send him to the state school, which is where he wants to go and where he will be with his friends. Make sure that he understands that he has to work hard or you will remove him from that school and send him to the private one.

If he underperforms academically, use the money you would have spent on fees to pay for tutoring.

I might be pointing out the obvious here but this school is also serving the communities around it...it won't just be filled with kids from the deprived area....it will also have the kids from the affluent surrounding villages and towns.

If the school is this bad I am sure its reflected in its Ofsted report and on the Gov. School comparison website......is it not in special measures maybe? If it is...the money will get thrown at it and the right head put in to bring it up to par.

This happened to one of our local secondary schools and I was very concerned about where my 10 yr old should go. I was floored by the exam result improvement in just 3 years....and being shown around the school....wow...all shiny and new...new school.name, new uniform....inspirational mottos around the schook....a canteen to die for. I felt so reassured about the school..I had been prepared to send him to another school which is not in our catchment area as its 1 mile further away. As it was my amazing son passed his 11+ and is going to the local grammar school.

Go round the school...arrange to go during the day and see lessons in progress....get a feel for the kids and interaction with the teachers.....then make an informed fevisiin. Good luck!

Make the world a fairer place. Send them to the state school!

daisymoo2 very rude of you to say that children who go to school are entitled brats. You know every single person who has been to private school do you OP?

Entitled brats may be taking it a bit far, shall we say a touch arrogant maybe? I am speaking only from experience

@AnxiousAngela we still own the house, but couldn't afford to buy in the new area right away. If we like it here long-term, we will look to sell/buy. If we don't, we can back to the previous house.

My 12 year old daughter, who has always been ambitious, came home talking about how it wouldn't be a big problem being late teenage and pregnant, and how it shouldn't really matter to me whether she worked or claimed benefits. How she didn't think she would bother with uni, as people from our area didn't bother and they were ok. This isn't just my DD, but stories I've seen repeated through her primary class if friends.

Tutors are all well and good, if it's a problem with teaching methods or understanding. But how does a tutor combat the underlying attitude in a school and the expectations of failure? It's not worth the risk to me, and 5 years of uncertainty can and will make a huge difference to her whole life. Gotta be worth it.

Go and look at both schools. And don't be taken in by shiney facilities.

Have/Will either school have a change of head? Has the catchments school been OFSTEDed recently? How did it do? If it is overdue then could a bad OFSTED really shake things up? (Some schools in very deprived areas of London get fabulous results, so deprivation isn't an excuse.)

Knob jockey you are the primary role model, not her peers or school. If she comes from a nurturing, intellectually stimulating, 'aspirational' home life, that will follow through to her school life. You don't need to go private to succeed in life!

If your dc are hard working and have supportive parents they will likely do fine. They want to go there. You said yourself the school "seems to be well led and is working hard at helping all children achieve".

I'm happy to send my kids to average schools, maybe even below average, if it's clear that the teaching is of such a quality that strong, supported children can succeed.

But some schools right at the bottom of the pile have long given up, and the day is more about firefighting and controlling outbursts, misbehaviour, children leaving classrooms and children who actually want to learn are forgotten about, sat in noisy rooms with teachers who can't be heard and suffering lengthy group punishments.

There's a line you have to draw. The school I want for my kids is in a mixed area, with a mixed intake, and it wholly supports every one, and achieves around 60-65% pass rate. Yeah, I wish it was higher, but I reckon kids who work hard will be OK.

However there's a school next door to me with a 20% pass rate and no kids get As or Bs. And I encounter them when they arrive at and leave school. And they are frightening. They hurled snowballs at me when I was pregnant and struggling on ice. They have beaten passers-by who have intervened when they have tried to help weaker students being beaten by bullies. There are acts of violence and arson frequently in the news. No matter how hard I imagine there are some teachers trying to teach well, and some students trying to learn, it frankly does not feel safe to sit in those rooms, with those students, nor can I imagine the days pass pleasantly with frequent police visits and the toilets being set alight.

You have to weight it up. Beyond a certain point, a 'school with a challenging intake but where everyone does reasonably well' becomes 'a hole'.

You must visit the state school. Get a feel for it. Try to speak to parents in your situation who sent their kids there. Motivated kids with motivated parents will do well in lots of different situations. Your kids could well shine at the state school, as well as having lots of really valuable experiences to mix with people outside a narrow social circle.

I would go and look around the state school and ask lots of questions to get a general feel of the place and go from there.

I can only speak from my own personal experience in that I was forced to attend a very strict all girls catholic school where I was bullied mercilessly for 2 years until in the end I refused to go back and my parents put me in the local comp, which was where I'd wanted to go in the first place. I didn't come out on top with my exams but I didn't do badly either considering I had huge issues around anxiety as a result of the bullying.

Children do tend to do better in places where they're happy in my opinion.

Visit the school and look at the results in detail. If they've got a good number getting A's and B's at GCSE then you might be ok. If not then go private. Harrop Fold school on Educating Greater Manchester is a fabulously we'll run school with a dedicated staff and some fantastic interventions but the GCSE results are appalling and with the best will in the world i wouldn't be confident that they could even teach to B level let alone A/A*

I’ll definitely be going for another look round both. I don’t want to have to top up with lots of after school tuition. If that’s the case I’d rather just pay and get the tuition during class time. The lack of peer group at the state school concerns me. The village school is very small. The vast majority of pupils come from the deprived town. It’s not all about exams either. It’s where DC will have the best experience. DC1 wants to transfer with friends (number of which I can count on one hand). I’m from a state school background and that would be my preference I suppose but I can’t help but worry I’m not doing my best for them when we could choose the private (our closest school) with a more ambitious cohort.

If you will still be financially comfortable with sending her private I would do it in a heartbeat!

@LethalDrizzle I appreciate I'm the primary role model. As I have been the sole parent in her life, I've always worked full time to provide for her and I have just completed as degree with the OU alongside this, which has taken 6 years of blood, sweat and tears, so I like to think I've set a good path for her to follow! I have always told her that her expectations in life should be high.

However, sometimes that's just not enough. Sometimes, for lots of kids, spending 7 hours a day with people who don't have that mindset, where parents don't work or big sisters are expecting a baby at 17, that runs off on them.

I could have employed a tutor. But that doesn't mean that she would pay attention any more in class. I could try to make her go to after school clubs- not sure how you ensure the teenager has gone, when you are out working.

I chose to take her from that environment, and put her in one with an ethos of good behaviour, learning and extended education. For the record, that wasn't a private school, it was another state secondary, but it has meant that we have moved to a new town. The difference in attitude in 1 year has been a revelation.

@DaisyMoo, it's easier to say than do, but take friendship concerns with a pinch of salt. I absolutely promise you that her group of friends now are 99% likely to be a different group by halfway through year 7.

If the two schools were level pegged, then absolutely choose state, why wouldn't you? But, if, like me, you live in an area where there is a very high unemployment rate, teen pregnancies, low exam results, low amount of teens going into higher education, then I think you do need to look at other options.

It's not raw exam results which are important but whether the school is helping each pupil reach their potential.