Sorry this may be a bit long. think I already know what I should do about this,but I'm just asking for MNer's opinions. There are 3 issues in question here.
My OH (I can't even bring myself to call him DP any more) went back to his home country in Africa nearly 4 weeks ago to visit his family,for the first time in nearly 18 years. He said he was going for one month,so he would have been due back this coming week. I spoke to him on the phone this Monday just gone,and he kindly informed me that he will be staying for 3 months,not one,and will be back about a week and a half before christmas. He swears that it was a 'spur of the moment' decision,not pre-planned. I have my doubts. I was upset enough about him going for a month,so my gut feeling is that he knew it was for 3 months,but didn't tell me because he knew it would upset me even more. I just feel so let down and pissed off about it all. I was so looking forward to his return then he drops this bombshell.
The other issue is his behaviour prior to him going away. He had told me back in August that he was planning on going,he just wasn't sure at that stage exactly when it would be. I accepted this,but said could he please give me a bit of advance warning and not drop it on me at a minutes notice (he has form for being a bit of a last minute merchant). He assured me he would. Anyway,he turns up round at my place on the evening of the 18th September and says he's going on the 21st! As if this wasn't bad enough,he then asked me for all his clothes so he could get packed. I said that a lot of his stuff was in the dirty washing,they wouldn't be washed and dried until the following evening,thanks to him not giving me enough notice. He had the nerve to grumble about this,saying he had told me he was going. I said yes,he HAD told me he was going,but not exactly when.
I have since also found out that I'm pretty certain that he's lied to me about which airport he flew from. i.e. that he went from our local airport which is literally a 15 minute bus journey from where I live,even though he said he was going from an airport which is about 30 miles away,and impossible for me to get to on public transport (I am without a car at the moment).He said that if he had been going from our local one,I could have gone with him to see him off,but that it wasn't practical from the one he was actually going from. Out of curiosity,a couple of days after he left,I looked up online which flight he'd taken. I knew which airline it was and he had said it was a direct flight with no stopovers. But no direct flights operate from that particular airport to where he was going. In fact there were no flights to the particular airport he was going to,on that day,full stop. So I've come to the conclusion that he DID actually go from the local one,but told me otherwise to put me off going with him. Now,if he hadn't wanted me to go with him for whatever reason, (hating goodbyes etc) I would have accepted it. But why lie about it? I have not said anything to him about this during our phone calls,but it is bugging me. I feel like he has told me lie after lie. What would you think? And what would you say/do when you saw him? We've been together for 2 years and 7 months.