To ask for your stories of fucking up on your first day at a new job?

[SussexMedley]

Started a new job today (it's funny hours that include weekends). Fucked up. I'm smarter than my anxiety disorder has me appear sometimes, but anyway I fucked up on my very first day of a job I really really want.

Please tell me your tales of fucking up on your first day. Happy endings or shit endings, I don't mind. They'll make me feel better either way.

Thank you.

I stretched in bed before getting up, first morning of 6 month student placement. Trapped a nerve in my neck and it was agony. I couldn't straighten up, my chin was down on my chest. I crept into work, and lasted about an hour before telling my minder that I was in agony. I was escorted to the company nurse who sent me back to bed!

Had a seizure on my first shift behind a bar in a nightclub, smashed around 100 glasses.

Straight from school, excruciatingly shy and gawky as f* in my first job, the Director rang one of the phones when everyone else was out at lunch and he asked who I was. I still cringe at my response - "Oh, I'm nobody really". I had also shaken someone's proffered hand before realising that he was just trying to take my signed contract. Ouch!

Personally, I try to see some degree of (ok - dark) humour in events like this if at all possible. If not, allocate a horror scale of 1 - 10, with 10 being an interplanetary nightmare. Your bad experience will / should be low level (usually only 1 - 2, with a max horror rating of 3 - 4) and just realising that things aren't as bad as you think might make you feel better. Or at least that's my theory! (hopeful....)

Worked for an animal charity and went into the block of 10 dog kennels. First job to lift the individual hatches so that the dogs went into their outer runs whilst we cleaned their inner quarters. I hadn’t checked that the outer doors had been closed and was only aware when a friendly pooch came to say hello ... from outside the kennel runs! There were 10 dogs now running lose and having a whale of a time. Some had gone past the introduction stage and were humping each other.