To ask when your DC felt like a real person to you?

[WonderLime]

I'm just wondering when that moment of realisation hit that this little being is a real, tiny little person. Was it a sign soon as they were born? Before? When they said their first word? Or strung a sentence together?

My DC is 12 weeks and I see elements of personhood in him - like now I've found out he's ticklish on his chest, or a certain song that makes him smile. But overall it still feels like being a baby and having personhood are seperate things to me, and he hasn't quite developed full 'personhood', if that makes sense.

When did you first think that you had a real little person?

lela yes I think that was a big part of it...the shock of babies not being small, snuggly or huggy. Seriously DD would not be hugged and wouldn't sleep on me either. I felt like I only touched her when she was screaming.

It actually took till she was about 2.5 yo for her to get the hang of hugs...and even then she would kind of reverse up to you so she was facing outwards always....but at least she could sit on your lap!

I got to cuddle a baby niece a while back and I cried and cried afterwards because I'd so missed that part of having a baby with my own child. I don't think I'd even realised how much till I felt how right it felt to hold my niece in my arms.

When I was pregnant! My lower twin never stopped moving and jumping, the upper one was much calmer. They're at school now and exactly the same!

When I was having DD, I woke up at 5am on the Wednesday to be induced and didn't sleep until about 1am on the Friday when I'd given birth, been cleaned up and moved to the ward. I was so tired and on autopilot that it took about 3 days to realise that my tiny baby was even real. She started to seem like a proper little person at about 3 months old when she started liking different songs and being loving and cheeky.

Pretty much from birth.

At birth. When I was pregnant they were "babies" but as soon as I met them they were entirely themselves.

The second he was born. It was a shock. I was preparing myself for a baby and this person arrived. He was having a good nosey around when just his head was out the midwife told me. He's 14 now. Still the same. ❤

I think there were aspects of their personality that showed through early but with both mine I think 18 months is a huge milestone as you get to know likes and dislikes and its when they both started putting words together.

I would say about 10 months they start getting really fun and becoming proper little people. Before I had my kids I had no idea how much of a fully rounded little person a two year old was!

I know what you all mean but I have a 9 year old and it’s really now that I’m finding her interesting as her own person with her own opinions, if that makes sense. It’s fascinating. Before that of course they’re their own person but it’s sort of part of a family unit. But now I can see her beginning to strike out on her own to some extent.

To be honest from the word go - DS1 - difficult birth, difficult to BF but once we worked out what we needed to coax him around he was super easy. Even now, he's stubborn and normal parenting techniques rarely work on him even though he's a lovely, sweet boy.

In comparison DS2 - is very straightforward and easy in personality but prone to surprises which cause chaos. His birth matched this - barely knew I was in labour and then I nearly had him down the toilet. He can be playing really nicely one minute then the next minute he's halfway up a bookcase, or filling the loo with toys. You get the kind of thing - but super straightforward as a person - you only have to say 'no' 2-3 times, where as DS1 probably 200 times.

First child he was about 4 months before I felt anything but proper fear (I had very severe PND) and he was 18 months when I kind of felt wow I'm a mum.

Second one I felt it the moment I saw 2 blue lines (had major PND again and was hospitalised but it was never about my relationship with him).

I guess it makes sense that their personalities become more obvious when you have a second. Sometimes when he’s laughing or pulling faces, I’m not sure if he’s just being a baby or if that’s his personality shining through.

It’s interesting to see such a disparity between ages for everyone.

5-6 months

Apparently DD showed hers before I came round from the GA during my EMC.

She was very prem and a twin (hence the crash CS) and they tried twice to intubate her, but failed. On the third go she clearly thought 'Oh for gods sake I'll do it myself then' and started breathing unaided.

Pretty much sums her up.

When she first smiled, she is 1 month now. Babies are a bit like a sack of potatoes that need feeding and changing until they properly start interacting with you. She also rolls her eyes a lot so I know she has an attitude like me

When he was a restless wriggler in my tummy, we could see my belly move from.right to left and back again. That was when!

I hadn't thought about this but some time before he was born. When I saw him between my legs there was no break in the pattern, it was like catching sight of someone I already knew. He was calm in the hospital and quite reasonable, which he still is.

I think about 9 months with my first .Maybe a little later with my ds, he is 13 months now and definitely a proper little person - he has started dancing, he tries to make us laugh by running away with things or hiding and he gets really cross if he doesn't get his own way!

And actually ds was always quite a serious baby and quite clingy to me whilst dd was smiley and confident from very early on. But ds turned 1 and totally.changed he is now smiley and getting much more confident.

countlesS glad you said that, I thought it was just me. For me it was around6/7 when I realised they had their own thoughts/opinions and actually made reasoned statement s as opposed to demands/ observations. I like this bit.

The night they were born. Certainly within days.

He laughed at us. DP, DS and I were sitting on the sofa and I started going "no no no no no, YES!" (like the old guy from vicar of dibley ot the Churchill dog) and DS gave this beautiful magical laugh! So I did it again and DP joined in and DS laughed SO hard! We spent a solid 10 minutes doing it over and over and listening to his fantastic laughter, we even caught a minute or 2 of it on film.

He was about 3 months old.

With ds i went into labour 10 mins before my induction at two weeks overdue. Even now he won"t do things until the last minute when he knows he will be forced to.