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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to be absolutely furious at the bloke on Abortion on Trial (currently on BBC2)

83 replies

RestlessTraveller · 16/10/2017 21:30

He the only bloke in the debate. He was pro-choice until his partner had one against his will, so now he wants it recriminalised.

Dick.

OP posts:
DovahBee11 · 16/10/2017 21:55

What a tool!

Angrybird123 · 16/10/2017 21:55

He's just said now that the panel.of judges could decide to force a woman to abort ..oh no wait hmm.

user1485342611 · 16/10/2017 21:57

Wow. So men have no say in whether or not their child gets to be born? Obviously they then have to be prepared to take full responsibility for that child. But they do have rights as long as they're prepared to see the situation through.
And the child, ultimately, has the right to live.

PurpleDaisies · 16/10/2017 21:59

So men have no say in whether or not their child gets to be born?

They get to have an opinion but that's as far as it goes. The only person who decides is the one whose body it affects.

expatinscotland · 16/10/2017 22:01

'So men have no say in whether or not their child gets to be born? '

Until they can carry a child and give birth to it, they cannot force another person to carry and give birth so that 'their child gets to be born'.

MillicentFawcett · 16/10/2017 22:01

God he was thick

mirime · 16/10/2017 22:01

So men have no say in whether or not their child gets to be born?

No. At least partly because pregnancy and childbirth itself is a risk to the woman's health - something that seems to be conveniently ignored.

RestlessTraveller · 16/10/2017 22:02

He really was. Where the fuck did they find him?

OP posts:
Angrybird123 · 16/10/2017 22:02

They have every right to choose not to have unprotected sex, or to choose to not believe / trust / rely on the woman who says they are on the pill / have the coil etc and use a condom. Once they make the choice to risk it, and risk the possibility of a genuine failure of contraception then yes, the biological fact of female pregnancy ends their choices at that point.

juddyrockingcloggs · 16/10/2017 22:03

Suburbanrhonda -

Whilst I agree with the point initially raised and agree a woman is entitled to do as she chooses I would like to give an alternative view regarding it not being a ‘baby’. As a woman who has suffered numerous miscarriages and due to 6 cycles of IVF thus having 12 ‘embryos’ transferred I can honestly say they are ‘babies’. I miscarried babies not mere embryos.

IcingSausage · 16/10/2017 22:06

He realised he’d totally screwed himself with his ‘panel of judges’ suggestion when he realised in theory his panel of judges could force an abortion...which he is against...but that’s ok, it wouldn’t happen because his independent judges would all be pro life. Obvs.

poshme · 16/10/2017 22:07

What mirime said.

titchy · 16/10/2017 22:08

But they do have rights as long as they're prepared to see the situation through.

No they don't thank fuck. Can you imagine:
'Of course I'll take full responsibility for the baby when it's born.'

7 months later:
'Hello, hello, where are you? The baby's here and you need to take care of it. Hello....'

GabsAlot · 16/10/2017 22:09

its not their body therefore not their decision

MrsDustyBusty · 16/10/2017 22:10

He did seem to have a blind spot. Under his system, the only person who'd have no say is the pregnant woman.

No wonder his ex had an abortion. I wouldn't want to tie myself to him forever either, he's got very serious problems with women and control.

AppleTrayBake · 16/10/2017 22:13

No man gets to dictate what any adult women gets to do with her body. Ever.

Why is it so difficult for some men to understand?

SunnySkiesSleepsintheMorning · 16/10/2017 22:14

A man does get a choice....when he chooses what to do with his penis.

QueenOfTheAndals · 16/10/2017 22:14

No uterus, no opinion!

IcingSausage · 16/10/2017 22:15

That was a thought provoking programme.

Moving away from Lee, it does make me think though, my knee jerk reaction, like many of the programme participants, was ‘oh god no, no one should ever abort based on the sex of the baby’, and I do find the idea horrifying, BUT. If it’s ok for a woman to abort a baby based on her inability to care for it appropriately - might not a woman who DESPERATELY wanted a baby of a specific sex, view that in the same way? Ie, ‘I couldn’t love, care for and meet the needs of a boy because I so desperately want a girl?’ so therefore, for the sake of my mental health and the future of the unborn child, I need to abort?

Surely being pro choice means upholding a women’s right to choose no matter how unpalatable we might find the reason?

juddyrockingcloggs · 16/10/2017 22:19

*IcingSausage
*
But surely she knew that there was an awfully good chance of her conceiving the ‘wrong sex’ child? Does she continue to abort until she gets the sex she wants?

AppleTrayBake · 16/10/2017 22:19

A women's reasons for ending a pregnancy are no ones business but her own.

IcingSausage · 16/10/2017 22:25

Does she continue to abort until she gets the sex she wants?

Yes, I suppose she does. That’s choice isn’t it?

mirime · 16/10/2017 22:27

@IcingSausage While I'm pro-choice, deliberately getting pregnant then aborting a healthy foetus because it's a girl (and it is likely to be mostly girls) is not something I'm completely comfortable with.

mirime · 16/10/2017 22:29

Yes, I suppose she does. That’s choice isn’t it?

And if it's her husbands choice rather than hers?

juddyrockingcloggs · 16/10/2017 22:29

*IcingSausage
*
Personally I think she should consider embryo selection if she’s willing to do that!