Parent phones in sick for their DD at work. AIBU to think this is silly?

[AppleBananaCarrot]

I don't understand why my manager allows it. I'm a supervisor btw. I have name changed for very obvious reasons.

The woman is almost 19! I could slightly understand if she was 16 (although I'd still expect her to do it) it's in our policy that you can't get someone else to phone up and on the 3 occasions she has been sick (over last couple of years) it's always her mother that has phoned in, I asked my manager and he said that the DD was on a drug that makes her tired, so she couldn't get to the phone, but really? If my husband phoned in and said that, I think they'd life and tell him to put me on the phone.

My mother has had to email call etc. on my behalf and I run my own NGO. There can be many circumstances why she can't do it herself but you don't know about.

I think its odd to insist a sick person does the phoning in.
If I am too sick to work its not unreasonable to think I might be too sick to get up early and call in work if I have someone willing to do it for me.

At my work we just email in. This stops the entire charade of the "sick voice".

With all due respect OP you don’t know the full story here. My work will often let a colleague’s mum call in sick for him for a similar reason - found out very recently that it’s because he has severe lupus and gets so tired sometimes he can’t even lift his hands.

We have an email sick policy - as he can’t work his hands when he gets like this, the manager lets his mum call.

What if the person is too I'll to speak or is in hospital. If so.wone has MS it can make their speech slurred and difficult to understand. Yabvvvu.

DH phoned in for me once whilst I was in hospital miscarrying my baby. I could have spoken to her myself (he was sitting next to me) but I was too upset and in toovmuch pain to do it.

I work in a professional area but know that none of the managers have any problem with this, and know it has happened several times.

YABVU and judgey

I've never understood why it's an issue. When I was a teen I worked in a supermarket and they used to always give me a telling off 🙄 despite the fact I was suffering from recurring tonsillitis which eventually meant I had them removed. Whenever I did phone in myself they'd always make a huge song and dance about not being able to hear me on the phone and I'd end up passing it to my mum anyway. I'm now a nurse and if carers family call in for them I don't bat an eyelid. When you're unwell, the last thing you want is to try and speak on the phone.

MY old place of work had the same policy. I got disciplined for my dad calling in for me.

Bear in mind at the time I was in an ambulance, screaming in pain between sucking in gas & air because of a very severe sudden onset of renal colic.

But apparently I still ought to have called in myself.

When I stayed at home my mum phoned in for me . It was great. I hate phoning in now because there's always an awkward silence which I feel obliged to fill. This is why I never phoned in sick.

I employ a lot of 16-21 year olds and loads of them get their parents to phone in. I think it's silly too. I see as usual on MN people are going to the extremes and regaling stories of tubes down throats or not having a phone.

If she's just sick or has a cold then I agree it's a bit immature.

I already said that the policy is to call in sick yourself unless you're in hospital, so why keep bringing that up?

All these peopke who 'just couldn't" and had to have their partners do their big girl work for them - how do you reckon single people handle this?

I often text my boss, she's happy with a text message.

As a single person, I've had to text in and phone / email later. My colleagues, knowing I'm single, will then text to ask if I need help.

It does not matter. Get a hobby.

Everywhere I've worked they've insisted the person who is sick called in. I hate it, I don't pull sickys but you worry about how you sound on the phone, to chipper? Or like your putting on a sick voice? I get migranes a lot and I hate it becuase I wake up two hours before I start work and rather than resting I spend two hours stressing over that phonecall till its done and then the migraine is often worse and any chance of sleeping it off is gone! Not to mention I'd really rather not make a phonecall when moving, light, or talking is excruciating. I really don't get why I can't email.

Once I text my manager to let them know and they still insisted I call which felt accusatory to me.

Somewhere I worked once someones partner rang in to say their wife was to sick to come to work because she had been hospitalised due to her cancer diagnosis which they knew about, the manager informed him his wife needed to call herself and he apparently told her to fuck off! The joys of retail.

I think it depends why the mum was calling though, daughter has a cold? Not on. Daughter has been hospitalised or has lost her voice? Fair enough. Also, at my job I often have to tell my manager that x y z needs doing today or shit hits the fan. So its better I tell them that than expct my husband too!

Probably because its a fucking ridiculous policy that serves no purpose.

As long as you know they're not coming in, does it really matter who calls?

"it's in our policy that you can't get someone else to phone up"

As a hard and fast rule, the policy is clearly unworkable and your manager obviously understands this, and knows that she/he must use her/his discretion as to how strictly the policy should be applied in individual cases.

I don't see your problem. Your manager has indicated to you that ... in this case ... there is a reason why the policy should not be strictly applied, which is fine.

Your company policy is that the person has to phone in sick themselves. Unless there is a good illness related reason that they can't, then yes this woman should be treated like everyone else.
Although I have to admit, I wouldn't care about this myself.

what difference does it make? why get so hang up about something like this? why even have such a policy? is there some reason behind the policy I am missing? maybe there is, but it just seems so insignificant, surely the question is simply is the absence from work justified? if so, who cares who phones in?!

God, I really wish the philosophy around work was different, more humane and relaxed, we are still people when we are at work!

The reason companies have this policy, is that research shows that people are less likely to take a sickie if they have to phone themselves. It is a pretty common policy for companies to have. But exceptions are always made if people can't because of more serious illness.

I always think it's funny when people say "get a hobby" what's that supposed to even mean? My work comes before any hobbies. I'm glad it doesn't seem like an issue to you lot, but as a supervisor in my company, I have to discipline my team and make sure policies are being followed, if not I get the stick, not my manager. I get it from higher up.

Our absence policy requires the employee to phone in themselves and speak to a manager. Leaving a voicemail is a no-no, so if you can't get hold of your manager, you have to keep ringing different managers until you find one that's not on a course/on leave/in a meeting. I once had to ring head office and speak to a manager who had no idea who I was or what I did.

They're not unreasonable though, I'm sure they'd be understanding if you were in hospital or something.

Phoning in sick can be a huge cause of stress and anxiety for some people, and whilst in an ideal world the ill person would call personally, does it really matter who calls as long as it's reported in?

Flexibility and compassion in the workplace are far more important and effective than punishment and rigidity.

Who cares who phones as long as work know you can't come in.
There are a hundred and one reasons why you would be unable or don't want to talk to someone at that time to be quizzed over why you are off.

It doesn't affect anyone else, phoning in yourself won't make a difference to you going in or not.