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Original poster

Memories that make you laugh out loud

82 replies

Mammyloveswine · 13/10/2017 20:17

I hope I'm not being unreasonable on a Friday night to ask for those memories that when you remember them have you randomly laughing away.. . Even when you're in public (I.e sat on the bus..)

Here's mine...

When we both still lived at home my sister was laying in bed late one night, having fallen asleep listening to her iPod.. the next thing she is rudely awoken by our naked mother landing on top of her! Turns out my mum (pissed) had taken a wrong turn on the way to the toilet, wandered into my sister's room, slipped on a magazine and landed on my poor sister! Even funnier was that my poor mum broke her thumb in the process!

It still makes me laugh when I think about it now Grin

OP posts:
StepAwayFromGoogle · 13/10/2017 22:41

When me and my brother were in our early teens, we were out shopping with Mum and Dad one Saturday, being a bit sulky about having to be there. Mum had had enough and was marching through the shoe department telling us off. Only she wasn't looking at where she was going and walked right into a free-standing shoe display, one of the plastic ones. It fell flat on the floor and she was literally spread eagled on it. Thing is, she had also managed to work up quite some momentum with the tirade and so she didn't stop there. She just sailed on through the department, shoes going flying and customers jumping out of the way, until she came to a rest by the tills. The sales assistant, bless him, went straight over to my Mum being all 'madam, goodness, are you ok?'. Me, my brother and my Dad were on the floor. Dad was ahead of us and says he will never forget the sight of my Mum face down on a plastic stand overtaking him in John Lewis.

stopfuckingshoutingatme · 13/10/2017 22:42

Why all the ex best friends ? Did they pass away or did you fall out ? Sad to read

April241 · 13/10/2017 22:42

Oh oh and in high school music one day our teacher said to put on our headphones and practice. All of a sudden there's this REALLY LOUD classical piece, we all then round to see one of our classmates, headphones on, demo mode on the keyboard and hammering the keys like he was playing it himself. He had no idea his headphones weren't plugged in, absolutely hilarious.

Jemgoback · 13/10/2017 22:43

All my funniest memories were at school. One that always makes me laugh is me and my ex best friend got told to stay behind for talking too much. The horrid teacher was barking at us and asked my friend what she thought silence meant - she said quietly "not talking" and I just burst out laughing. I couldn't stop and the teacher just stood there and watched me laughing my fucking head off for about 10 mins.

Jemgoback · 13/10/2017 22:44

My ex best friend was because we fell out really badly when I had my first child. We had been friends for 20 years and now we are completely strangers. I miss her terribly.

tccat · 13/10/2017 22:49

I've told this before , friend and I had both stopped smoking but decided we would have a cheeky smoke
We drove to a shop bought a ten packet, she also decided to buy some chewing gum and mens deodorant to mark the smell
We smoked the fags like pan pipes and she then closed her eyes and sprayed herself liberally with deodorant....... except it wasn't deodorant she had bought, it was shaving foam😂 It was all over her face and hair and looked like she'd been in a mass orgy
I was laughing so hard there was no sound coming out

April241 · 13/10/2017 22:55

Oh my the tears are real here!!

I remember another day one of my friends came in to work mortified. Said the previous night he'd been walking home and his friends dad drove by and stopped. He hopped in the car all "thanks much for the lift home!" Only for friends dad to say they were actually on their way to a restaurant for a family meal and he'd stopped as the traffic lights were red - he had to get out and continue the walk home. I think I genuinely weed myself that day.

MorrisZapp · 13/10/2017 22:56

Mine was last night. DS chummed me to the shop and while we were out it started pissing down. DS had no jacket on and after some whining persuaded me to lend him my parka. He's 7.

I walked home accompanied by a strange mixture of a wookie and Liam Gallagher :)

I couldn't stop laughing. The wee cord bits at the back were dragging on the ground.

MeatAndPotato · 13/10/2017 22:59

I feel your pain Jemgoback it is hard to reminisce!! pours yet another wine

MeatAndPotato · 13/10/2017 23:03

stopfuckingshoutingatme sorry I didn’t see this, she passed away couple of days just before I gave birth to my DS Sad I’d do anything to have her back and laugh with her again and cherish her, I never truely appreciated her.

Sob story over, returns to laughing at other people Wine

CesareBorgiasUnicornMask · 13/10/2017 23:06

Some of these are amazing.

My favourite one is from when DH and I decided to go for a weekend away after we'd been going out for a few months. We took a wrong turn and he drove my car into what we thought was a ford but was actually just a river. It made a horrible clunk and got stuck, and I burst out laughing. He turned round and looked at me with utter horror and said 'stop laughing and start panicking', which just made me laugh more. Then we noticed the large congregation of French teenagers pointing and laughing at us from a nearby bridge. I had to get out and wade into the river to try to work out how he could manoeuvre us out, which I did while trying not to cry laughing, while he died of embarrassment and kept begging me to stop laughing which just made it worse.

Ohwell14 · 13/10/2017 23:07

Walking down the street with dp. We were talking about being embarrassed by each other. I told him there was nothing he could do to embarass me. So he pulled his pants down just as the back so you could see his ass and ran down the street. Loads of people honking and laughing as they went past. I was giggling my head off and no I wasn't embarrassed Grin

WantToFeelFabulous · 13/10/2017 23:09

StepAway that is utterly amazing! Grin

Whitelisbon · 13/10/2017 23:11

Dh was sitting on the computer chair, and he has a really bad habit of leaning really hard on the back of it. He was sitting telling me and his parents about his bad night at work the night before, when the back finally snapped like I'd been telling him was going to happen and down he went, legs in the air.
His mum went rushing over to help him up, and, as he got up, we realised he'd been drinking from his bottle of Lucozade, which had ended up all over his face.
I couldn't look at his dad, and had to leave the room before I wet myself.

zukiecat · 13/10/2017 23:27

Years ago as a young teenager I went on holiday with two aunties

Aunty No 1 and me were in the swimming pool and Aunty No 2 was coming to meet us for coffee. She slipped and fell fully clothed into the jacuzzi, Aunty No 1 and me were laughing so hard we nearly peed ourselves

Another time a friend and me were walking her dog in the park, Susie the dog spotted some ducks in the pond and took off down the hill towards them, my friend fell on her bum still holding onto the lead and got dragged down behind Susie with her legs splayed out as if she was sledging, straight into the pond. I nearly ended myself with laughing! Grin

LittleLights · 13/10/2017 23:33

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

plominoagain · 14/10/2017 00:40

I can't now move furniture with DH without breaking into giggles . Years ago , we bought a new sofa , which meant that we had to get the old one out of the house . We had paid for the council to collect it, but it had to be out on the drive for them to pick up. No problem . Except that since the old sofa had got into the house , we'd had the windows and front door replaced , and we couldn't get it out of the front door . So it had to go out of the patio door at the back, and down the side alley . Which was also too narrow, and the fucker got stuck . Well and truly . We shuffled and shuffled at every angle to no avail , and ended up in hysterics . And taking a chainsaw to it . The neighbours thought we were having a row , because all they could see was me wiping tears from my eyes , and the other half wielding this chainsaw ...

TossDaily · 14/10/2017 05:27

These are so funny I've had to take my glasses off to wipe my eyes.

The poor husband biting the chest of drawers and the cross mum in John Lewis are brilliant!

But the shaving foam!

MoodyOne · 14/10/2017 06:25

My little brother must have been around 8 or 9 and we all went to the local museum, which had very big glass windows and doors , he excitedly ran down and out passed reception and full force into the glass window, my entire family were laughing so much at him, the reception staff were mortified and could get to him quick enough wondering if he was ok, while we were all just laughing... I am giggling here now remembering it

LloydColeandtheCoconuts · 14/10/2017 06:53

Thanks for this thread OP they are very funny Grin

A few years ago I was in the local supermarket and as me and DP were walking out I saw a heavily tattooed lady in her wheelchair and was really staring at her! Next thing I knew I walked slap bang into what I thought was the sliding door! Blush It made an almighty bang, cue staff rushing over to see if I was alright. I was fine - just my pride was dented. Serves me right for staring!
Makes me laugh now although at the time I was mortified.

speakout · 14/10/2017 07:10

As a 19 year old in the early 80s I went on holiday with my ( very lovely) boyfriend to Greece.
We ate a lot of watermelon, not something I had ever tasted - living in a rural part of the UK, such fruits were rare then.
I naiively decided to bring one home in my hand luggage.
I chose the biggest watermelon I could find with a taught skin and stuffed it in the overhead locker.
When we arrived in the UK and opened the locker it looked like a crime scene.
The reduced pressure in the cabin during the flight must have caused the watermelon to explosively burst and the watermelon was splattered everywhere. Red flesh was stuck to everyone's luggage and red juice by now was dripping out.
It looked like someone had been murdered.

I was mortified but too scared to own up. Instead I tutted and complained with everyone else- who could have been so stupid to carry a watermelon on board? Some people have a nerve.l Hmm

Sorry if that was your bag. Blush

ShoutyMcShouty · 14/10/2017 07:23

These have made me smile so much! It's like the embarrassing page in a magazine where the worst wins £10, does anyone remember those?

Mine is from when I was shopping with DH in a department store, we'd split up to separate departments so when I was done early I went to find him. I snuck up behind him and pinched his bum but he pretended to look down on me did an exaggerated "whoa I don't know you strange woman" look. Then he did an outraged storming walk and went straight down the escalators!
Other shoppers were looking at me in that men's department like some sex pest! He was waiting for me at the bottom laughing his head off, and so was I by then.

HoofWankingSpangleCunt · 14/10/2017 07:31

In the early days of dating my late DP we were walking along Commercial Road (a hugely busy road) in London to get to the bus stop to go "up west". I was hungry so bought a banana from a shop. As I was am very immature, I started (mildly) simulating oral sex with my banana. At the very same time, I belatedly realised that a carload of nuns were stopped at the red lights and were of course all looking at me.
I had to sit down as I was laughing so hard.
I mean, what were the chances of that?
Cant look at bananas and nuns the same way anymore.
I had so many moments laughing like drains with him, I miss him.

YoureAllABunchOfBastards · 14/10/2017 07:46

Staying in a holiday cottage with electric meter. DH kneels down to put a pound in the meter, which was in a cupboard. He drops the pound and starts searching for it. A sudden yell and he emerges from the cupboard with a mouse trap on the end of his finger. To make it worse he stands up, hits his head on a handily placed shelf and knocks it off the wall - still with mousetrap on his hand.

Oh God, I thought I would die laughing...

Original poster
Mammyloveswine · 14/10/2017 07:52

Omg I'm 7 months pregnant and have actually just weed at the shaving foam, the "non lift" and the watermelon..actually crying!

I'll tell one of mine that is a bit outing but I can laugh about it now.

Went out when I was a student one Christmas, absolutely hammered..... any way trudged home in the snow to my parents house only to find that my key wouldn't work drunk me was distraught and wailing heavily as I was cold and just wanted my bed. Cue my parents next door neighbour appearing in the middle of the night to ask if I was ok k k. He duly came to help me with the key only to inform me id been trying to open the door with a 50 pence piece!

OP posts: