Aibu to not know why you wouldn't be able to feed your DC's breakfast?

[Bearlover16]

Daughters school has recently extended the 'paid' breakfast club to 'free' breakfast club due to an increase in the number of children going to school not having had any breakfast.

Are people really that much on the bread line that they cannot buy a loaf of bread or some cheap porridge oats for less than a quid?

I'm not well off by any means and I do donate to food banks when I can. I also ensure my dcs have had breakfast before leaving the house as I was always led to believe it's the most important meal of the day.

[mmzz]

@Dippingmytoesin How awful for you.

I would say though that luckily most people don't suffer from anorexia.

Force feeding anyone? No. But yes to actively encouraging, up to and including the sort of firmness you might take for bedtimes, homework, going to school, etc., etc. I think failure to insist on being the parent in the relationship IS a sign of bad parenting.

[differentnameforthis]

I am saying get a grip and help yourself, if you can. If you can't, then we should all help you whilst according you the utmost respect. Oh that is SO not what you said in your 16/10 10.40 post!!!

[mmzz]

No that's exactly what I said.

[EvilDoctorBallerinaVampireDuck]

mmzz well for most of those examples I let DD take a bit more responsibility herself at 10. If she's still awake past 9pm she knows she'll be tired in the morning. If she doesn't do her homework she can explain why to her teacher. I'd make her go to school if I ever needed to. She suffers no ill effects from skipping breakfast, so I wouldn't keep encouraging her if she didn't want any.

[mmzz]

@EvilDoctorBallerinaVampireDuck The age when a child is mature enough to make those decisions for themselves is a very individual thing. There is no set age. Hopefully we can all agree on that.

I don't know your daughter, and you do so I have nothing to say about her.

However, IMO it is extremely uncommon for a child to be able to run her own life for these things at the age of 10. Any 10 year old can do it - but the question is: do they make wise decisions?
If they stay up late, skip meals etc, then likely they aren't making good decisions and the parent should still be making the effort to do it for them.

[EvilDoctorBallerinaVampireDuck]

They only make them once mmzz! 😂

[EvilDoctorBallerinaVampireDuck]

DD really doesn't need breakfast. We had parents' evening yesterday, and yet again there was nothing negative said about her. I don't want to boast on this thread, but she had a reading age of 12 at 6, she's asked to do y6 maths because she already knows the maths she's being taught, so she's going to free maths lessons at a prep school on Saturday mornings, she's obsessed with zoology.

I'm only saying all this because neither she nor her big brother have suffered academically because they don't eat breakfast. I can see how that would happen in some families, but presumably these children are actually hungry. DD does suffer if she doesn't drink enough, and that's an ongoing battle because I'm not there to remind her at school.

[mmzz]

The thing is its basic biology. You need sleep, water and fuel to thrive.
I know we eat more than we need, but if your DD last ate at 7pm say, then her stomach will be empty by 11pm and by 7am, she should need some more fuel so that she can work efficiently until lunchtime.

(Apologies for having written this because I know everyone knows it already).

We can train ourselves to do without food (5:2 diet, anyone?) , and after a while you learn not feel hunger, but it doesn't mean that our stomachs aren't empty and our bodies would not like to be refuelled rather than running on empty.

Your DDs achievements are impressive. She's more than meeting any government set targets and she's clearly bright. She'll do well anyway, but whatever her achievements, her body still needs to refuelled at regular intervals.

[EvilDoctorBallerinaVampireDuck]

I think 7am is just too early for her to eat. She eats at about 10 at the weekend, or whenever they have their break at maths class. Apparently they have squash, chocolate and apples.

[wannabestressfree]

@EvilDoctorBallerinaVampireDuck you were saying at the beginning of the thread that you couldn’t afford to feed them or buy them the things they need on your income.

It is basic biology. Yes there are going to be exceptions to the rule but 99% of children and adults do need to break the fast and eat in the morning to aid concentration, stabilise blood sugar etc.

I definitely notice the difference in behaviour and concentration levels of those children who have eaten and drink and what exactly they have had.

[EvilDoctorBallerinaVampireDuck]

Before that I stated that she doesn't want breakfast at 7.

I do manage to feed them, but very basically, and they don't have treats.

DD's behaviour has always been perfect at school, she does daydream, but I think that's a high intelligence thing, her DF, who's also extremely intelligent, tends to only listen to things he's interested in as well. When she ate breakfast every day she day dreamed just as much.