What does this mean? MIL Question

[ReallyConvolutedCareerHistory]

So my MIL is visiting from a foreign country and she was telling me about her jewellery.

MIL: "Do you wear earrings?"

Me: "No, I don't wear them."

MIL: "My sister also does not wear earrings. She says she doesn't like earrings because the pigs in the province have ears that are tied like earrings."

Was she taking a dig at my weight, like my friends say? Or is this a harmless comment?

Your friend is being professionally offended.
Pigs have ear tags the same as cows to identify them. Sister doesn't wear earnings because for some stupid reason she equates them with animal tags. That's her business but it's got nothing to do with you.
It's patently obvious that's what her sister meant and she is just repeating it.

The leftovers thing is probably just her not being used to it. If you feel she makes other real intentional digs them have a word with your dp.

Your friend is oversensitive --a fantasist* and looking to be offended. Your MIL meant nothing by the earring remark.

Your MIL probably did mean to express dislike of the leftover lunch idea, but she's allowed that opinion (slightly rude to express it thus though). A lot of other cultures are far blunter than ours and dissent on such trifling matters is socially acceptable, so I bet she'd be surprised to know you cared about her thoughts on the matter.

Why on earth can your NT, able-bodied husband (who is capable of holding down a job) not make himself lunch?

Do you put the leftovers in a lunchbox for him? Leftover chicken pasta or whatever is perfectly fine.

But how do you mean he cannot make/ box up his own lunch? He is an adult going out to work what's so difficult about packed lunches?

Harmless - shes just telling you what her sister thinks.

On the other hand - i would question the friend - she is the one having a dig about your weight, as most normal people would understand your MIL was just making conversation, whereas your friend immediately jumped onto the wrong (and very rude) comclusion.

He does not know how to cook. That's what I meant by he can't make his own lunches. We also eat low carb so we prepare everything.

Watch out OP this thread will fast become a DH bashing thread not it has been wheedled out of you that DH isn't all that adept in the kitchen!

"Watch out OP this thread will fast become a DH bashing thread "

Yes, because it's totally normal that a grown man can't make a sandwich. His cock is just totally in the way of the breadknife, and then it stops him getting to the fridge and finding the cheese, and then if he's not careful it leaps out and wees all over the finished article without him being able to do a thing about it.

Except for all those male chefs who are absolutely completely and utterly brilliant at what they do. They've all been castrated.

MIL threads have taken on a new level of ridiculousness.

My DH can't cook but he does really amazing things with technology. That's good enough for me!

Can he read? Drive a car? Hold down a job?

He can cook.

He can cook. He chooses not to learn.

There is no way his knowledge of technology or his penis stops him being able to cook.

If you are happy with that set up fine. Dh does all our cooking. But dont infantilise him by claiming he 'cant' do something when he clearly can.

Ok. Just to be clear by "he can't cook" I meant he does not know how to.

Blimey do you actually like either you’re dh or your mil.

If you are happy to do all the cooking crack on! But if he was starving he could cook.

Ditch your bitchy and possibly racist friend.

Blimey do you actually like either you’re dh or your mil.

Huh?

Honestly, isn't life difficult enough without dissecting every word the woman says to look for any hint, however tenuous of an insult? Interesting you state you like her - it doesn't sound like it. If your DH wont cook, that is entirely an issue between you and him.

Because you have hinted your mil is a sly cow and given us 2 incidences that everyone has said they were innocent remarks and you have made your dh out to be a bit pathetic.

It’s pathetic to say an adult can’t cook. Of course he can he just chooses not to.

To be honest I don’t really understand your posts

You've made a startling rod for your own back here. Your DH can't cook but can fanny about with a computer!? .

You also seem to be on a witch-hunt with regards to your MIL. I feel sorry for her actually. She has years and years of having her words dissected by you to look forward to.

I assume your MIL speaks English as a second language and am guessing much is lost in translation. Reminds me of when my DIL’s sister said “I am on the game” which would have offended your friend no doubt! She meant “I am on the case” which in her language is “on the game”.

Can’t get over how MNs are so invested in the division of labour in other people’s houses. I had 5 DC and a DH imagine if everyone had prepared their own lunch box from some enforced militancy. The chaos was bad enough as it was. Division of labour according to skill set. Fine by me.

I think your friend is stirring. Does she like drama? Your MiL sounds like fun (or in as much as one can say that from two comments).

How you and your DH divide domestic tasks is up to you. I don't understand why posters are jumping in to criticize when you have said there isn't a problem...

Of course he can cook - he just choses not to!

Just to be clear by "he can't cook" I meant he does not know how to.

Tee hee - yes of course he doesn't! It's called Competent incompetence. It means being very bad at things so other people pick up the slack and do it for you. Like putting leftovers into a container, or slapping some filling into some bread.

I am perfectly fine doing the cooking. Lol. Is it really a big deal?

sonjadog

Yeah, she is. I like her. Also she raised a wonderful, kind, loving, very intelligent person who loves me and supports me in all my endeavours. Only he does not know how to cook. Lol

Division of labour according to skillset - exactly!!!