Yes and I did it with three under five, full time work, sick elderly parents, ill husband - lets have some competitive hard times because I can trump yours a thousand times over - and I'd have hated someone to come into my house and slag me off because I broke out the hobnobs and didn't shake my weary backside once to the potty.
Oh please. If you want to play competitive go ahead, I wasn’t doing that m, have no interest in it and you know it.
I’m saying none of that is a reason to call your small kid an arsehole. Or any small kid an arsehole. Ever.
It’s also not ok to react aggressively to your toddler weeing or pooing when you haven’t put a nappy on them. Again, ever.
We’ve all done things as parents that aren’t ok. We’ve all lost out tempers, say things we regret. It’s important that we recognise those things so we can avoid doing them again. Normalising then to make ourselves or our friends feel better? No thanks.
OP is suggesting there is an ongoing pattern here, so suggesting it’s all about hobnobs and being a bit lazy about potty training, and don’t we all have days like that, teehee, is frankly minimising the impact that verbal abuse can have on anyone, let alone on small kids.
Let’s give OP ideas of how she can support and intervene with the friend and give both the friend and the kids a better outcome, great. I’m in favour of that. But minimising the friend’s behaviour isn’t going to do that.