Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

That my references not being acceptable is a bit strange?

48 replies

MaryPoppinsPenguins · 05/10/2017 21:02

I had a job interview for a local part time job earlier in the week and got it... I have an interview tomorrow for a full time one I really want so asked them for a few days to think about it.

I've been a SAHM for nearly 7 years... the references on my CV are from my previous employers, but the company I worked for closed here a few years ago and moved to Manchester and the people who were my superiors have moved on to other places.

I've had a message today to say that gmail accounts for these people are unnaceptable, and they have to come from the business address I worked for, I explained the reasons for this, and they just said I have to try.. Confused

Then I got a seperae message saying they need a reference that covers the last three years. I said that I haven't worked for the last three years, so can it be a personal one, and they said no. I have to prove what I've been doing in this time?

Is this normal? And if so how does anyone get back into work after a career break to raise a family?

OP posts:
rightnowimpissed · 05/10/2017 21:07

That’s ridiculous how would anyone ever get anywhere if that was the rule.

Get your dc to do one in crayon show them exactly what you’ve been doing

Alanna1 · 05/10/2017 21:11

Well, hopefully someone with experience in HR will come alomg.... but I would ask the Manchester company to confirm you worked at their other office from (date) - (date) and that your boss was (name) who has since left their firm but can be contacted at (contacts); ideally ex boss now has a professional email address he or she can be contacted at.
I would ask someone who has a professional role to confirm what you have done for the last three years.
Then give them the package and ask if that is acceptable?

Original poster
MaryPoppinsPenguins · 05/10/2017 21:11

That's what I thought! Now I'm panicking that if a miracle happens and I actually get this job tomorrow I'm going to have the same issue...

No one knows me at their offices in Manchester!

OP posts:
Sparkletastic · 05/10/2017 21:11

That is quite standard. An example of stupid rigid HR processes but fairly standard nonetheless.

existentialmoment · 05/10/2017 21:14

If they must have a reference to cover the last three years, write yourself a reference. Or get the children to do it!
Might make them realise how stupid their request is.

RosyPony · 05/10/2017 21:15

The company should still have a record of the dates you worked there, even if no one personally remembers you. I would call the new version of the old company and speak to HR and ask them to confirm who the HR contact is.

Appuskidu · 05/10/2017 21:17

It doesn't matter if no one knows you. You worked there and they will have records showing your employment dates.

balancingfigure · 05/10/2017 21:18

Is the job in education or childcare or anything because they are fussy (understandably) about cv gaps? I had to come up with some evidence of my gap year 20 years ago!

Original poster
MaryPoppinsPenguins · 05/10/2017 21:19

But presumably they can't really say anything about me? They don't know if I was the best employee ever, or late every day and asleep on the job? It's just a really weird way of doing it.

OP posts:
Valeriemalorie · 05/10/2017 21:20

Have you done any voluntary work or helped in the school during this time? If so, could the head teacher be a referee?

Original poster
MaryPoppinsPenguins · 05/10/2017 21:20

The part time job is in customer service in a library...

OP posts:
Original poster
MaryPoppinsPenguins · 05/10/2017 21:20

I'm chair of the PTA... shall I ask her for a reference?

OP posts:
LizTaylorsFabulousTurban · 05/10/2017 21:21

If the job is finance, insurance, or security related then it may be for screening purposes. If do, you might be able to use bank statements or a stat dec from a solicitor. They should have explained this however.

PetalMettle · 05/10/2017 21:21

They can just confirm you worked there, what your final salary was etc

Valeriemalorie · 05/10/2017 21:22

Surely just confirmation that you were an employee and the dates you worked for them is enough?

pitterpatterrain · 05/10/2017 21:22

They don't need to say any more than you were employed and the dates, rare to get a reference that is more than that

MrsJamesAspey · 05/10/2017 21:22

They need proof from the company that you worked there those dates.

Actual references saying how good an employee you are aren’t worth much anyway as ex employers never say anything bad in case they get sued

PickAChew · 05/10/2017 21:22

Yes!

LizTaylorsFabulousTurban · 05/10/2017 21:23

Ah cross post, just seen job. Ignore my last post, it looks like it's someone misinterpreting HR policy.

BabychamSocialist · 05/10/2017 21:23

I've never heard it really. When I check references I e-mail and usually phone the person if I want a bit more information. Have never known an e-mail address to be refused - some businesses don't even have custom e-mail domains!

smellylittleorange · 05/10/2017 21:23

PTA is absolutely relevant - so yes ask Headteacher for ref

Fourmagpies · 05/10/2017 21:25

Most references these days just confirm the dates you worked for a company.

Dafspunk · 05/10/2017 21:29

When they say references, they are almost certainly just meaning confirmation of your role and dates of employment - they're not asking them for details about your performances so it doesn't matter if they knew you.

The person collecting the references is just following procedure - just be as helpful and resourceful as you can - e.g. the school head could confirm that they've known you for x years and to their knowledge, you've been bringing up your family, blah blah blah.

At the end of the day, they're just trying to confirm that you've not been in prison/running a satanic cult or similar pastime.

Slimthistime · 05/10/2017 21:30

Balancing " had to come up with some evidence of my gap year 20 years ago"

OMD. What do these people want? Why would they need to see that?

AnchorDownDeepBreath · 05/10/2017 21:31

* But presumably they can't really say anything about me? They don't know if I was the best employee ever, or late every day and asleep on the job? It's just a really weird way of doing it.*

This is fairly standard. The employer will write the dates you were employed and your position; maybe your final salary, and that’ll be accepted. It doesn’t matter that they don’t know you, they’ll have company records and nobody expects a proper reference after so long anyway.