Keeping 3yr old at home from school nursery for a morning

[MrsPringles]

Donning my hard hat just to be on the safe side!

DS was 3 at the very end of August, just started nursery school 5 mornings per week (had previously been at a private nursery 2 full days a week) He gets picked up by a childminder 3 times per week and stays with her til 6 (other kids there and other pick ups so no chance to sleep) and then the other 2 days I am at home and collect him from school.

He is exhausted. Ridiculously exhausted. Comes home and sleeps for 3 hours, pretty much wakes up for an hour or so play before dinner and is back in bed for bedtime at 6.30

I am so tempted to let him have a day off (well 3 hours as it's just the morning) next week to catch up, weekends we have the boring jobs we need to do and then my days off are gone by him sleeping.

So AIBU to keep him at home one morning next week? He's just 3 and it's nursery school.

Wow Evil - I didn't realise it was common. I cant imagone sending a child to "school" in that sense at 3. I thought reception at 4 was young enough!

I feel lucky we have preschools here that let you choose the days as I thought that was normal.

Sorry he's at a school nursery, not a Forrest school nursery but every Monday that have a Forrest school time, wellies and waterproofs on and outside to explore

All mine still napped after school until y1, DS2 has only just stopped in y2! Because of the distance to school and long hours (6.5), he wouldn't have got enough sleep otherwise.

right is that in Wales? I see above it's like that in Wales.

I'm in England and there's a whole selection of nurseries (usually longer day daycare) and preschools (more usually 9-3ish but choose sessions within.)

I woudlnt be sending my child at 3 every single day if I had a choice. (As I wouldn't have for reception year to be honest if that had been more flexible.) Around here it was just those who had to for childcare reasons.

Presumably if you have to do half days parents who work end up having to use childminders around that if there's no nursery/whole day option?

At 3 do what is best for him. I think I had DD in nursery 2 mornings at 2, 3 at 3 and 4 at 4. Nothing is compulsory till he is 5, so if you are able to then give both of you a break.

G1raffe it's not remotely academic though. In fact they've now lumped nursery and reception in together into EYFS, I can't really see much difference between nursery and reception.

My children loved preschool but I personally wouldn't have wanted it every day. Or the structure of uniform, bookbag,attendance either.

We used our whole days off to go seimming, to parks for the day, to the beach etc. I woulnt have wanted to give that up at 3. (And as Ive said am happy with reception but would be happy if in an alternate universe reception was 3 days a week )

There was a huge difference between preschool and reception here. Not least reception was a teacher and Ta and although lovely and play based was still only 2 staff to 30 kids

Preschool was much higher ratio of adults so there was always adults actively playing with the children, smaller group and about 4-5 adults. Much more family based and flexible.

I think our reception is much closer to your preschool. It's still very much focused on play, although they start the 3 R's. There are a lot of adults. When DS2 was in nursery and reception I think there were about 50 children in the 2 classes, and about 10 staff.

I think it's worth speaking to the school to see if you can do that on a regular basis.

I'm in Wales and my 3yr old could've started in the school nursery when he was 3yr3m but we delayed that for 6m so he was a bit older. Now it's 5 days 9-3.15, school uniform, etc. He had homework last week . It's definitely 5 full days or nothing.

Wow full time at 3. That's hard-core!!

Yep, same here, 8.50 - 3.15. They used to gradually up the hours when DD started, when DS2 started it was full time from the off.

Surely it’s your child your choice? There’s no legal obligation for them to attend Nursery so you can do what you like

Is there any option to move back to your other nursery?
I moved my oldest ds to the school nursery 5 mornings a week for the last 6 months before school. He had been doing 3 full days at his nursery so actually more hours, but I still had 4 full days at home with him. I really regretted the move as every weekday was taken over by preschool so we couldn't have days out or even just playing at home in pjs. it really made no difference to him starting in reception.
My younger 2 have both stayed at private nursery for 2/3 full days as needed for childcare so we can do our own thing before the strict school routine starts.

I done it with DD1 she was always really tired and suffered with constipation, so I always took the Wednesday off for at least six months. She is 9 now , she still is exhausted after school but has no problem going everyday.

I doubt you would lose the place. I would run it by the Nursery teachers.

Why are you worrying over something so unnecessary?

Your child you choice regarding your child's hours at Nursery.

So much pressure. And for what?

Children don't legally need to be in actual education until the term after their fifth birthday.

Why are you questioning yourself?

All my boys napped after preschool - luckily daycare just popped them in with younger kids having naps. Otherwise they were total demons so feel your pain. Poor middle dc slept though most afternoons in reception - teachers would ask and told them he's sleep by 7pm and up at 7am

Nursery as in private day care plus the schooling element then yes you can do whatever suits but if you choose to send a child to school nursery then you have to do the hours given. If you don't then you are taking a place that someone else could have had. I'm interested to know what a pre-school is because I hear it a lot on here but I'm in Wales and, where I live, it's private nursery or school nursery. Half day sessions at school nursery.

Where I live (England but I'm realising it varies within) there's a choice of "nursery" which is 0-5 and usually open hours to manage parents working. So I imagine some drop off at 8, pick up at 6 and some pick up a bit earlier. Often a series of "rooms" so bavies have their own space etc. 3/4 year olds follow the same kind of provision as preschool.

Lots of childcare trained staff.

Preschool here used to be from 3+ and was more to do with giving the child opportunity to play with other children without mum etc rather than childcare. When I wa doing parents would often pay for a few mornings, when I had kids the 15 hours free education had come in.

Usually you choose how much of the 15 hours you wanted and when - so for one child I did 3 mornings then increased to 4 nearer the end. Other child I did 2 9-3. Some used full 15 hours.

Preschools often are 9-1 or 9-3 here and you choose a mix of mornings and or afternoons. Some settings only offer certain days and/or mornings some days.

It's changed again now the 30 free hours have come in so I guess increased.

So no clear answer but the idea of a child going to actual school at times you've not chosen before reception is quite alien here! (Thankfully!)

Spoke to my husband last night and he agrees that as a ONE OFF, I'll keep him at home one day next week.

I am grateful that we got a place, it's an excellent school and I hope we get a reception place there but I don't think we realised what a big change it would be for DS.
He can have a morning off next week and then he's got a break over half term to recharge and then we just need to make it up Christmas before I have him home with me again for a week!

I'm not going to make it a regular thing for now as I don't want to jeopardise his place there but I just know my little legs needs a day off to not be rushed into uniform and taken to school so that's what we're going to do.

And as others have said, I know him best, he's still so little, doesn't have to legally be there so one morning I think, will be fine. We're definitely going to go to the park in our wellies, stamp around in the leaves, feed the ducks and find conkers and I already can't wait 💙

Have a lovely day :)

in all honesty, I wish I had left him at the private nursery and started all the school stuff next year when he legally had to be there but hindsight is a wonderful thing confused

Just wanted to point out that he never legally has to go to school.

I know he doesn't. But we have to go to work therefore we needed him to be in some form of nursery.

And this is the option we went for. In a perfect world, I would be a SAHM but we've got a mortgage to pay.

Okay. But school isn't childcare. And home educating doesn't require you to be a SAHP.

Sounds like you have a plan though.

The thread has probably moved on - but if you are at home 2 days a week,why does he go t nursery for 5 mornings? At 3?