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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

AIBU to wonder why thread's are deemed OK until OP pulls them?

44 replies

KrytensNanobots · 29/09/2017 11:10

This morning for example, horrible thread, and MN said "they allow discussion on robust innermost thoughts" so the thread will be standing.
OP pulls it and it's suddenly deletion message "the last thing we want to do is upset people so it;ll be going now."
People saying it was upsetting this morning but it was OK to be upset then?
I don't get it.

OP posts:
LanaKanesLeftNippleTassle · 29/09/2017 11:17

Hah I thought this.

So @MNHQ....
It was fine for loads of people to be upset by that thread, it gets to stand, but as soon as the OP realises she's fucked up, she gets upset, and then suddenly it's ok to delete it because OPs getting a bit embarressed??
Have I got that right??

That thread should have stood, to remind OP and others of their shallowness and idiocy.

So fuck everyone elses feelings, just want to spare the OP's blushes when she couldn't hack some of the replies.

YOur deletions policies are getting weirder and more random every day HQ.

Original poster
KrytensNanobots · 29/09/2017 11:22

I just don't get why it's OK for people to be upset as robust innerthoughts are allowed then the next minute when OP pulls it as the thread's not going the way they wanted it to, then the last thing wanted by MN is for people to be upset so it's going?
That's the complete opposite of what was said earlier.
There'll be a lot of upset people out there ( me not so much, learnt to ignore twats like that years ago) but it still can hurt for some.
Why was it OK to be upset before the OP got upset? Genuine question, MN, I never usually post anything like this but I'm baffled.

OP posts:
Coconutspongexo · 29/09/2017 11:24

Or 'OP has concerns about privacy' or ever abouts despite the fact the OP hasn't given any information which would make them idenifiable to anyone

Justonemorepleasethen · 29/09/2017 11:25

Which one was it?

PoppyPopcorn · 29/09/2017 11:27

I've only once ever asked for a thread to be deleted. It was one about a dietary restriction at my child's school, there were about 500 posts on it and i had a private message from a "journalist" saying they wanted me to run the story, name the school and put in a photo of me and child.

Err, no. Told journalist to fuck off and never contact me again, and asked MN to remove thread in case they just ran it anyway. Which they very nicely did.

Mischa123 · 29/09/2017 11:28

Was this the one about finding fat people repulsive?

Original poster
KrytensNanobots · 29/09/2017 11:30

OP repulsed by people with certain bodies etc, people saying what they found repulsive too
MN said they allowed robust inner thoughts even if people were upset by them.
Then the deletion message said "the last thing we want is for people to be upset."
That's the opposite of what you said before the OP decided to get it zapped though as was getting pulled up in it... Confused

OP posts:
Original poster
KrytensNanobots · 29/09/2017 11:31

Poppy can understand that, that's privacy concerns so no wonder you wanted it zapped. Smile

OP posts:
flippinada · 29/09/2017 11:32

Yanbu. I've seen similar recently. Lots of threads taken down on OPs say so.

TheMaddHugger · 29/09/2017 11:37

Understandable Poppy. ((((Hugs)))

Justonemorepleasethen · 29/09/2017 11:45

It's really annoying that they just take down any old post, certain posters have regular threads taken down

unfortunateevents · 29/09/2017 11:52

I think MNHQ is in complete chaos over the proliferation of trolls, PBPs, journalists lifting stories etc and is seemingly completely incapable of either improving their security or coming up with a coherent policy to deal with trolls and people who request threads to be deleted. There is no consistency at all and it is getting worse.

TheHeraldOfAndraste · 29/09/2017 11:55

It was an awful thread. Completely at odds with MNs so called "This is my child" campaign and their professed "support" for the SN community. The reaction to it was dire on HQs part.

Purplemac · 29/09/2017 11:58

This really bothers me. Last year I posted something that turned into a very long thread that I thought might be identifying and potentially very harmful to my family if I was identified, and when I asked for it to be pulled because it was upsetting me, I got told no!

TheHeraldOfAndraste · 29/09/2017 11:58

MN said they allowed robust inner thoughts even if people were upset by them.
Then the deletion message said "the last thing we want is for people to be upset."

Or:
We allow robust debate because it increases site traffic and posting. Followed by oh shit, it's not quite working out as intended. Pull the bloody thing. Make some half arsed apology for upsetting people.

unfortunateevents · 29/09/2017 12:05

Exactly Herald

Original poster
KrytensNanobots · 29/09/2017 12:17

We allow robust debate because it increases site traffic and posting

Good point, must be that as it was apparently OK for people to be upset originally.

OP posts:
Original poster
KrytensNanobots · 29/09/2017 12:19

Completely at odds with MNs so called "This is my child" campaign and their professed "support" for the SN community.

Exactly. I don't understand why it was OK to stand until the OP decided to pull it - either it was upsetting or it wasn't Confused

OP posts:
MNHQ
SophieLMumsnet · 29/09/2017 12:22

Hi everyone,

Thanks for flagging this.

The thread received an increasing number of reports, a lot of MNers were upset by some of the posts, and then the OP asked for it to be removed.

In these cases we will keep an eye on a thread, and if we feel it's rapidly going down hill, as was the case here, we will delete. We would have removed the thread even if the OP hadn't requested us to - we should have made that much clearer, so we're sorry about that and we're sorry too, if we've caused any further upset; that's really never our intention.

Thanks Flowers

FrustratedTeddyLamp · 29/09/2017 12:28

Deletions do my head in there’s some really inane threads that get deleted like for example I saw one about a woman who’s bosses told her a secret but she wouldn’t tell anyone the secret so the thread was pointless, yet it got deleted.

A personal thread about my MH when I was vulnerable and family dynamics and personal detail, small thread I went back and counted 25% of responses were mine, it wasn’t fair because “ it wouldn’t be fair to others that had chipped in with their view” and got advised to hide the thread.

SandyDenny · 29/09/2017 12:32

The privacy deletion is the most insulting to the reader, I can't remember the details now but recently I was on a thread with zero identifying details that ended up being deleted for privacy.

A bit more honesty would be appreciated, the op's realised he/she is being a bellend maybe

FrustratedTeddyLamp · 29/09/2017 12:34

Yet it got deleted for Privacy reasons*

LongWavyHair · 29/09/2017 12:36

I think a poster has every right to have a thread removed that is either identifing and/or was posted in the heat of the moment when the op was angry/stressed/sad and once they have calmed down they panic about being identified and it causing shit for them in real life.

PandorasXbox · 29/09/2017 12:37

So you was vehemently against what that particular OP had posted yet you start another thread where it's inevitable that the content will get discussed OP?

FrustratedTeddyLamp · 29/09/2017 12:40

And it wasnt deleted because “ it wouldn’t have been fair to other posters who have chipped in and gave their view “ *

Sorry my heads all over the place