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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think getting to appointments early is rude?

91 replies

splendidisolation · 22/09/2017 08:26

Every fucking time without fail, woman arrives 15 minutes early to her physio appointment which puts me under pressure to hurry up on machine so she can get on, even though my slot has another 15 minutes to go.

Its just like....seriously, can you not listen to a few extra tunes in the car? Have a fag? Enjoy a sit in the park right next door?

I can uear in my physios voice it annoys him too because he has to stop what hes doing to answer the door. ARRRRRRGH!

OP posts:
Pikachuwithyourmouthclosed · 22/09/2017 08:27

No, it's normal to arrive at an appointment early.

museumum · 22/09/2017 08:28

15min seems fine to me. They should have some chairs and magazines for waiting.
If she gets the bus or walks she won’t want to stand outside.

ProfessorCat · 22/09/2017 08:28

I get to appointments early because I have severe anxiety and I need the time to calm down actually in the setting I need to be in. Staying in the car doesn't work for me.

I know what time my appointment is, I don't expect to be seen sooner. Surely that's what a waiting room is for? To... Wait?

If you feel under pressure, I do think that's your issue and not the issue of the person using the waiting room for its purpose.

Phosphorus · 22/09/2017 08:29

Don't be ridiculous.

Your physio ought to have an open waiting room, or someone to answer the door, if they are going to run appointments back to back.

niknac1 · 22/09/2017 08:29

I always thought it was polite to either be on time or early, I would have felt rude to be late.

FriendshipBraclet · 22/09/2017 08:29

Do not take this on...tell your physio you find it uncomfortable and that he leaves your session. It's up to them to enforce their boundaries.

LisaSimpsonsbff · 22/09/2017 08:29

Is the appointment in his home? If so I do think arriving so early is different (and much more difficult) than doing it somewhere with a waiting room. It is tough though - traffic is rarely so reliable that you can avoid being early without risking being late.

shaggedthruahedgebackwards · 22/09/2017 08:30

If it was at a clinic with a receptionist then fine/normal to arrive early but agree that if your physio works from their own premises and doesn't have a receptionist then arriving 15 mins early is a bit inconsiderate

QuitMoaning · 22/09/2017 08:30

Not even slightly rude. Just being organised and allowing contingency.
Advising me to have a fag would get an inappropriate response as I hate smoking.

guilty100 · 22/09/2017 08:30

You can't stop her arriving early, but you can control your reaction to her arrival so you don't feel hurried. There's no reason why you should: I am sure she's happy to wait.

But I'm slightly surprised that you're doing physio in what sounds like a semi-public space. Is there not a separate waiting area?

FakePlasticTeaLeaves · 22/09/2017 08:31

It's more annoying the way the place is set up i.e. Him having to leave and open the door, which really isn't her fault. He can either get help in, or make a rule if he dislikes it i.e. Please turn up 5 minutes before. Both not down to her to fix.

You shouldn't feel pressure to hurry up though? Why do you feel like that - just pretend she isn't there and carry on till the end.

Urubu · 22/09/2017 08:32

YANBU
You are supposed to arrive early to most appts!
I imagine that people who plan to arrive exactly on time are the ones who are often late...

Original poster
splendidisolation · 22/09/2017 08:34

Yes you're right, it is my own issue re feeling hurried, and the place is set up in a weird way!

I still think it's weird though.

OP posts:
displacementofwater · 22/09/2017 08:35

It's not rude to arrive early so an appointment can start on time, no.

However, the setting shouldn't be such that you feel uncomfortable about it. Speak to your physio about them making more suitable waiting arrangements.

FrancisCrawford · 22/09/2017 08:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Laiste · 22/09/2017 08:35

Hmmm. If this is in a private home environment i think turning up 15 mins early is unreasonable. Not everyone has somewhere to 'store' early birds. I've twice used a professional working from home. Neither case had somewhere for me to sit while i waited and i wouldn't expect them to. They were employed to deal with me from x to y time - not whenever i fancied turning up.

Purpose built building will/should have a waiting room so in that case 15 mins early is no prob.

Birdsgottafly · 22/09/2017 08:35

Do you know that she drives and isn't relying on Public Transport or a Taxi, both which you can't exactly time.

Hospital appointments often ask you to arrive 15 minutes early, so many would apply that to any medical appointment.

It is your issue. You each have time slots, why do you think that she expects hers to start early?

Anecdoche · 22/09/2017 08:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PopcornBits · 22/09/2017 08:37

Well I think that's you're issue isn't it? The person turning up early hasn't done anything wrong but be punctual to their appointment.
I often turn up early to my appointments mostly due to the way public transport works, I can't just pick and choose when I turn up.

You need to a get a grip slightly.

Anecdoche · 22/09/2017 08:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

NC4now · 22/09/2017 08:39

I hate earliness (is that a word?!) more than I hate lateness. It makes me more anxious and when I'm on the receiving end I get stressed and rushed. I do find it rude.
I'm a bit weird like that though.

LoniceraJaponica · 22/09/2017 08:39

"I still think it's weird though."

No it isn't. It really isn't. DD has a lot of medical appointments. It is rude and inconsiderate to other people to be late, and stressful for the patient if they think they might be late. Even getting there just on time can be stressful.

Where we live we can't anticipate what the traffic/public transport will be like so we always have to factor extra time in to get to hospitals etc.

Sparklingbrook · 22/09/2017 08:39

He should allow more time between appointments if he has to answer the door.

billybagpuss · 22/09/2017 08:40

YANBU

It sounds like this appointment is at a professionals home, in which case he should make it clear that they should arrive at the appointment time as he has other clients and wouldn't wish to interrupt their time. If they arrive early, which most people do as it's usually organised and polite, they should wait in the car.

I am a private music teacher and have this issue fairly frequently particularly with new students but I politely request on the first lesson that they wait until their time so as not to disturb the previous student. My teacher as a kid used to leave her door on the latch so we just walked in, I certainly wouldn't do that these days.

SerfTerf · 22/09/2017 08:40

Bloody hell. I clicked to say I allow bags of time for things these days because my malfunctioning legs so strange and unpredictable things and I'm never sure if I'll be able to walk a minuscule distance or merely a short distance and I've even done stupid things like not put the crutches in the car and blah diddy blah...

And blow me down, you're bitching in a physiotherapist's clinic and want us to believe the physio is himself a miserable bastard devoid of empathy or tolerance 🙄

Get a life.